553 lines
18 KiB
Plaintext
553 lines
18 KiB
Plaintext
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mindflow #5 09.12.94
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ascii version
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(c)1994 mindflow publications
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about mindflow-------------------------------------------------------------------
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concept/editor: josh ruihley <jrruih0@ukcc.uky.edu>
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programmer : keith shapiro <kdshap0@nx41.mik.uky.edu>
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mindflow is a monthly ezine that features poetry, short stories, brainstorms,
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random thoughts, essays, ect. basically, mindflow features thoughts. it
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takes what people feel and what people think and it compiles these thoughts
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into a monthly mind trip for people across the country and world to enjoy.
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all that is really needed to enjoy mindflow is an open mind, so open up your
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mind, and enjoy.
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mindflow is free to distribute as long as its contents are not altered in
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any way. each piece in mindflow is personal property of its author and may
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not be copied in any way (except when distributed with the whole issue of
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mindflow).
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format:
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right now, mindflow is distributed in two formats.
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one: ibm .zip file. this file includes the actual mindflow program which
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is menu driven and has vga graphics. if you are on an ibm, ***i highly
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recommend that you check this version out.***
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two: universal .txt file. this is just all of the contents of mindflow
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typed out in ascii (.txt) format. this will work and print on almost any
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operating system out there. all of the same great pieces, but not as
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pretty as the .zipfile.
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subscriptions:
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subscriptions to mindflow are free. to subscribe, just send your email
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address to:
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kdshap0@nx41.mik.uky.edu or
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jrruih0@ukcc.uky.edu
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please include whether you want the ascii (.txt) version or the uue encoded
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.zip file.
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submissions:
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this is the most important thing about mindflow. without your thoughts and
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your submissions, mindflow would be nothing. for the most part, all
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submissions are accepted , so if you would like to see
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something of yours in mindflow, please, send us your submission.
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all versions of mindflow (.zip and .txt) are available at:
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bulletin board systems:
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ripcurl bbs (versailles, ky) 14.4 1.606.873.6637
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the void (hopkinsville, ky) 14.4 1.502.886.0517
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2400 1.502.886.5871
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fallen angel bbs (lexington, ky) 9600 1.606.299.2329
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aoyu (lexington, ky) 2400 1.606.273.6836
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commercial:
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america online
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keyword: writers
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writers club e-zines
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internet:
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anonymous ftp: archive.etext.umich.edu /pub/Zines/Mindflow
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editors note------------------------------------------------------------------
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welcome to mindflow #5! this month is a big month for us. mindflow is now
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officially on the internet. this means that mindflow is now available to a
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whole new group of people: definitely a step in the right direction.
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we here at mindflow are also heavily encouraging subscriptions to mindflow.
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subscriptions are absolutely free and mindflow will be in your mailbox the
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day of release each month. to subscribe, just send your email address to
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keith <kdshap0@nx41.mik.uky.edu>. please let him know if you would prefer
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the ascii (.txt) file or the uue encoded .zip file.
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this issue: once again, there are many, many great thoughts from different
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people in this mindflow. most pieces this month can be classified in the
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brainstorm, poetry categories. there was a shortage of short stories this
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month, so we can try to make up that next month! anyway, i hope you enjoy
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this monthly compilation of thoughts.....
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------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Autumn Storm By Danielle Cosney-------------------------------------------
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Crisp, iridescent leaves
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scrape the pavement
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as gusts of warm, damp winds
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carry them along.
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Swarthy, somber clouds
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swiftly roll in
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obscuring the bright sun.
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Irrigous drops
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fall from the ominous skies
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creating a gentle patter
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on the softening ground.
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The sweet smell of damp leaves
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floats soothingly with the breeze.
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cobain by Kurt Moskowitz--------------------------------------------------
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why idolize something
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why worship someone
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because there life is not finished and done
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4 he brought it upon himself
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not you
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there is no need for hysterics
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no need to hold your breath
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no need to repress your own freedom
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because most people expect more of you
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media surrounded him
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sharpened there knives
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and you can damn well say he payed the price
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for it was them
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that did it
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they wont admit it
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for the gun he used the media filled
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why do they morn for someone they
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killed
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a thought by Ann Keller----------------------------------------------------
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Sometimes the best times we have are only shared with our dreams.
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the fall by Andy Malloy---------------------------------------------------
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looking down i see the rocks
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and water flowing, white turbulence
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leaning forward thinking only
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"is it worth it?" and
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"is it worth it?"
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tipping past the point of balance
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moving beyond no return
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i'm falling, falling
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toward the rapids
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wind howling in my ears
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everything's a blur
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then in an instant
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it's over
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and my body swings
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under the bridge
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Untitled by Mike Laiacona--------------------------------------------------
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5am and sober
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i've never felt better
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life isn't broadcasted in 2 tones of gray
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life isn't hating myself or you
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life isn't a hazy delirium dream
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i still haven't forgiven myself for your death
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but i think about it almost every day
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I remember watching the news about
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our latest effort overseas
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and I can never forget seeing your name among
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those killed,
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and I can never forget feeling sick to my stomach
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so numb i couldn't begin to think it was true
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I crawled into a bottle that night and
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did not leave until now
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In altered states, I am the fool
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the prophet who seizes life in one breath
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and easily brushes it aside with the next
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In altered states the pain is all to real
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I wanted to lay side by side with you
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forever
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It was all to easy to do
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and that scared the hell out of me,
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so now it's 5am and sober
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and I never want to go back...
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flagging down the angels by Su Byron----------------------------------
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you gotta try to catch them
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these winged beings
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as they fly over churches on Sundays
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you gotta be quick
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to catch these pure things
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barely born and still covered with that cloak
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that coat of newborn goodness
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you gotta jump high to bring them down
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you gotta climb to the highest step
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while the minister curses you
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under his breath
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you gotta be quick
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and kiss every hand that will help you to
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where you need to be
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you gotta be able to stay on the roof
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all night while other guys
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make love and drink beer and read verse
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to their g-stringed mistresses
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you gotta play the game to get there
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to catch those flying angels
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believe me
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I caught one in a dream once
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and flew all night
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through bursts of violin music
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and sights of strange color
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that broke my heart
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you gotta kneel when you're close below them
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and with the cleanest face you can muster up
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you gotta gaze on them
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and with pure thoughts you
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gotta beg them not to pass you over
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Untitled by Bryan Mullins-------------------------------------------------
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little flower, why do you wilt so?
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when all your days are filled
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with sunshine
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and green fields?
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a dark cloud has passed over you
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and threatens not to leave?
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blocking the sunshine,
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making green fields grey.
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little glower, worry not
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your pretty purple petals,
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the sunshine within you
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turns again the grey fields
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green.
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Mirrors author unknown-----------------------------------------------
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Who was he? The strange man in the mirror. I never knew. I laughed with him
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sometimes, cried with him more, yet I never knew who he was. We often stared
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at each other but he never spoke to me or betrayed his secrets to me.
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I've heard that some people believe the mirror holds their soul and provides
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them a short visitation of it. Yet each time I came to the mirror, I was met
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by this cold stranger. I was forced by him to search within me to find my
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soul.
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After long searching I finally came to her, sealed behind many walls and
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buried beneath tears and lies. I looked to her and cried, embracing her after
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so long. I began tending her wounds and helped her from that place, giving
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her freedom. She smiled and rose, filling me and embracing me. Now when I
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meet the mirror, I see her and she smiles tenderly to me. We share our
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thoughts and secrets. I speak fondly to her and feel her reply.
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But I wonder what happened to the man in the mirror and who he was. I wish I
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could have known him and spoken to him. He is gone forever now. Perhaps he
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never existed, except as the guardian protecting my soul until she was strong
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enough to stand alone.
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--------------------------myself by paul kell------------------------
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to
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crawl
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outside
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myself
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and view what's
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left
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the visions of what
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i want to be
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my sights on what
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i want to see
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the
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mellow meadows
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of my mind
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changing seasons
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changing time
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changing things
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i want to find
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all wasted words
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from
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wasted lines
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the
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cold creeps
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in the
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light eludes
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my soul's what's
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left
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the
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dark secludes
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all that i see is
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what i am
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not
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what i'll be
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not
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what i've been
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alone
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to be
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without you
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here
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i see my sin
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i see my fear
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i see myself
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in this
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mirror
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an
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empty shell
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of what is
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dear
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what was
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life
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is now not
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there
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so
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what is it
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that
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i've found
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in these
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walls
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that
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surround
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to make my
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hopes and thoughts
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resound
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an
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inner peace
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before
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unfound
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tis it life
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flows from within
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beneath my breast
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beneath my skin
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beneath my soul
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the light within
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or is it
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not
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a
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myth
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a
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tale
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a
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talisman
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old and frail
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could it be
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something else
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gold within
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an untold
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wealth
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i know not
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what
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makes me decide
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right and wrong
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in all confide
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my
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conscious state
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of
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love and hate
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both absolutes
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we both
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debate
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loss of life
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or
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loss of soul
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the
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quest for truth
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my
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final goal
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"stricken, smitten, and afflicted"
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the
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anti-climax
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makes me
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whole
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Impatient Patience by Don McCormick---------------------------------------
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People say I'm impatient
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And that I have to learn
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That the world won't move when I want
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And I've got to wait my turn
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In my heart I know they're right
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And I'm doin' what I can
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But until I attain deliverance
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This is just the way I am.
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Now I know that the earth harbors
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Many strays, dimwits, fools and worse
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And I hear tell in third world countries
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Many people die shortly after birth
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But here in the U.S.A. Texas Triangle
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'Ole Beaumontville
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Our longevity permits
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That we may fret
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Over nothing more than a utility bill.
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But, lately I've found something that seems important
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And disturbs my little brain
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Concerns this girl I met the other night
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And if I'll ever see her again
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That may seem a little selfish,
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(Living in such a microcosmic world)
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But despite my adventurous spirit
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I'm just another boy lookin' for a girl.
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So, anyway, I thought I'd found her
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I felt so safe and warm
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My heart tremored
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Quakes of delight
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A rose without a thorn!
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So I cascaded down the steepest slopes
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Suddenly without fear
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Pretending everything was all right
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And that I wouldn't have to steer
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Thinking everything was OK
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And that I wouldn't have to turn
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That I would sail right into her life
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But I just had to learn;
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|
|
That I was ordinary
|
||
|
|
No matter how special I may feel
|
||
|
|
And that special feeling is temporary
|
||
|
|
And that's what makes it oh so real.
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
Like the bird and the worm
|
||
|
|
And the fish and the fly
|
||
|
|
And the balance of nature
|
||
|
|
And the way we survive
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
And the loving and the lonely
|
||
|
|
And the frost and the seed
|
||
|
|
And it's only through contrast
|
||
|
|
That we may see...
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
That it's the feeling that we crave
|
||
|
|
That drives us near insane
|
||
|
|
Yet we demand whoever brought it
|
||
|
|
Bring it back again
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
But then they're just carriers
|
||
|
|
Like it could have been the flu
|
||
|
|
-First they love you
|
||
|
|
Then they don't-
|
||
|
|
And there's nothing you can do
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
'Cept button up 'gainst
|
||
|
|
The gales of emotion
|
||
|
|
And fall in love
|
||
|
|
Whenever love gets the notion.
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
silence. (c)1994 josh ruihley---------------------------------------------
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
the stabs of silence
|
||
|
|
poke at me
|
||
|
|
robbing all
|
||
|
|
i'll ever be
|
||
|
|
no chance for reversal
|
||
|
|
no chance to turn back
|
||
|
|
now is too bright
|
||
|
|
and then is too black
|
||
|
|
i forked to the right
|
||
|
|
when left was what was true
|
||
|
|
i forked to the right
|
||
|
|
when left it lead to you
|
||
|
|
so here i am
|
||
|
|
confused and mislead
|
||
|
|
my chance is dead
|
||
|
|
my chance is dead
|
||
|
|
so here i am
|
||
|
|
confused and mislead
|
||
|
|
there's nothing said
|
||
|
|
my chance is dead
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
Spiny Blue By Joel Wheeler------------------------------------------------
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
I've only seen you once --
|
||
|
|
your azure mysteriousness
|
||
|
|
is so obvious to
|
||
|
|
all but me.
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
You're everywhere, but not for me
|
||
|
|
-- a Saturday morning dream.
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
A satisfied smirk is ever
|
||
|
|
apparent --
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
Sixteen short bits going
|
||
|
|
on thirty-two.
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
"the view from here" (c)1994 Amber Goddard--------------------------------
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
once, when i was very small and all things seemed good and shiny,
|
||
|
|
i fell into a round hole under the kitchen sink, and as i floated
|
||
|
|
weightlessly towards the prince of salamanders, i threw back my head and
|
||
|
|
laughed, because i knew things he didn't.
|
||
|
|
then he chewed off my innocence and, through the straw in my ear,
|
||
|
|
sucked away my
|
||
|
|
laughter.
|
||
|
|
this was when i was very small.
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
the bond of life (c) 1994 by keith shapiro--------------------------------
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
somehow i knew that
|
||
|
|
when i first saw you
|
||
|
|
that you were the only
|
||
|
|
someone for me.
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
at first you piqued at me
|
||
|
|
and then my curiosity
|
||
|
|
took over and wanted to know
|
||
|
|
something about you, dearest
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
there is a bond between us
|
||
|
|
even if we cannot see or admit it
|
||
|
|
it has always been and will always be
|
||
|
|
from a moment frozen in thought
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
time plays its leprechaun's tricks
|
||
|
|
dancing about and trying to break it
|
||
|
|
but that bond was formed out of time
|
||
|
|
and so he will never separate us
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
even though you may have left
|
||
|
|
gone away to anther place
|
||
|
|
these bonds are formed of something
|
||
|
|
that has no bounds or distance
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
and i will go on, doing and existing
|
||
|
|
waiting for the day when i can truly be
|
||
|
|
that is the day that you come back
|
||
|
|
that is the day that you return for me
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
somehow i knew... the first time i saw you
|
||
|
|
that there was something different about us
|
||
|
|
i never knew until i first saw you
|
||
|
|
that you were meant to be my match
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
and this bond will always be there
|
||
|
|
even after a million years
|
||
|
|
it is there and always between us
|
||
|
|
it lets us share our hopes and fears.
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
but this is hard, the words don't come easy
|
||
|
|
each one is a though about you
|
||
|
|
i don't know if i can bear it much longer
|
||
|
|
being here, without seeing you.
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
|
||
|
|
.
|