72 lines
4.0 KiB
Plaintext
72 lines
4.0 KiB
Plaintext
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ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #832
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`888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8 "A Short Lesson In Applied Calculus
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888 888 888 888 888 (or: How I Learned to Stop Hating
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888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8 Math and Love the Aluminum Can)"
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888 888 888 888 888 " by Ior
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888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 9/20/99
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o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
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when newton and leibniz concurrently discovered/invented calculus,
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they had little idea of how it would revolutionize industry. today,
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calculus is used for many things, far beyond the boring textbook examples of
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'if a hollow object created by rotating curve y = x^3 - 2x^2 around the x
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axis is being filled up by water at a rate of blah blah yadda yadda how long
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will it take for the object to be completely full?' analog electronics
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engineers use calculus to decide on the proper resistors to use when
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building that fancy new p8-12389752 gHz computer you're contemplating
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purchasing. architects might use it to understand the actual space of a room
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under and arching roof. and professors might use it to bore high school and
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college students.
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regardless, we owe some of the most astounding feats of modern
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engineering to calculus.
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the best example of this is the typically underappreciated aluminum
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can.
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stop for a minute and think about the aluminum can. you probably use
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at least one a day. it doesn't seem like anything special. however, the
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virtues of the aluminum can cannot be examined enough. the aluminum can is
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optimized for several things. let's list those:
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-- the can is optimized for maximum volume.
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-- the can is optimized for a minimum of physical space.
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-- the can is optimized for a minimum of physical weight.
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-- the can is optimized for maximum integrity.
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the first two optimizations are actually fairly simple problems to
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solve for anyone who has had a first year calculus course. the third
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optimization is possible with aluminum, a space age material made possible
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only through the use of calculus.
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it's the last optimization that is truly mindboggling. even just
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observing a single aluminum can full of a carbonated soda, the implications
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of this optimization are incredible. the authors lack of knowledge about
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the amount of carbonation in soft drinks means that the exact amount of
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pressure exerted outwards on the can is not known. it can easily be assumed
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to be over 1 atmosphere, if it weren't there would never be a problem with
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carbonated sodas fizzing over the edge of the can when opened.
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this optimization is even more spectacular when observing the
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aluminum can in groups. the groups being referred to here are not just the
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packs of six cans or the flats of 24. these groups are most easily seen at
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large warehouse stores such as price-costco. frequently, a single full
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aluminum can will be supporting easily another 20 or more cans directly on
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top of it! even the human spine would fracture if a single human were to
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support 20 other humans vertically. yet there is no doubt that the aluminum
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can could carry over 50 times its own weight with direct vertical
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compression.
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truly, the aluminum can is a marvel of the manufacturing process and
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is only possible through the great math of calculus. next time you finish a
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soda or a beer, do not simply throw the can in the recycling. instead,
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pause to look at the can. to notice its perfect shape, its meticulous
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design, and its dazzling abilities. only when one has contemplated this
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thouroughly may the can be discarded.
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[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #832 - WRITTEN BY: IOR - 9/20/99 ]
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