123 lines
7.2 KiB
Plaintext
123 lines
7.2 KiB
Plaintext
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T h e G R E E N Y w o r l d D o m i n a t i o n T a s k F o r c e
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Presents:
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"Literary Publications by S & S"
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by Seth Sometimes and Lasher
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*** This file is the combination of an article by Seth and an editorial by ***
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*** Lasher. They were originally printed in the Lubbock High newspaper. ***
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Overpopulation besieges us, our country over floweth. No less in the halls
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of ye olde Lubbock High, idle students mill in the halls causing congestion and
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curses.
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How many times have you been stuck in the second floor hall behind the
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mindless moron who, for no apparent reason turns and proceeds to yell to his
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friend in theater, first floor? What goes through your mind as your vital and
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shortened passing period passes by and you are stuck behind Mr. Ranting-Boy, or
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even worse, stuck behind the guy who is stuck behind the guy who is stuck behind
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the guy behind Mr. Ranting-Boy? What about when you have just enough time to
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speed-walk to your class, and suddenly the 6th year senior in front of you
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decides he's had too hard of a day and he needs to take a nap, right there, in
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the middle of the hall. When these things happen, what goes through your mind?
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Hatred? Death? Naughty Words? Suicide? Well, maybe that's just me, but no
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student may say that he has not had to deal with this each and every day.
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This year LHS has the great honor of hosting its largest sophomore class
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ever, over 800 fresh out Jr. High neophytes to help clog up the halls with
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sounds and bodies. Yes, sophomore pinball has always been a great way to
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relieve the stress of the day, but with a shortened passing period and over 800
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sophomores, there just isn't time enough for you and your sophball to get to
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class. Besides, this is school, and 800 sophballs is exceeding the allotment of
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"fun" that you are allowed to have, so you not only get a lunch detention, but
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you also get an "enjoying themselves, just too much" citation.
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Of course, the sophomores aren't the entire problem, the bulk of the crowds
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in the halls are created by those with ever-so-much care about their student
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career. I know sometimes, you just have to stop and talk to Bob, or walk about
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2 feet a minute and stare at your shoes, but face it, you can only talk to Bob
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so much, and those worn old converse just aren't that interesting.
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Then there are those who can't pass any acquaintance in the hall without the
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thought going through their mind "Gee, they didn't say anything, so they must
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not have seen me, I better go make them notice me", these accursed individuals
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then proceed to plow through everyone behind them, causing great havoc, hatred
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and generally bad mind sets.
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None are so bad as the ones who prefer not to go to class and instead feel
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the need to choose the busiest spot possible, mainly in hall intersections, and
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discuss the meaning of life, or something equally as important, gossip. These
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socialites are the very bane of any hall walker's existence.
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Our stairs are just unthinkable to even attempt to use with the popular guys
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who simply must wait betwixt floors for their friend Fred who has their Algebra
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II homework. I've seen cows with less body mass than these. Fred is dead, get
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moving.
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Then there are those who just can't stand to sit idle for any, no matter how
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meager, amount of time. Ah, you finally make it to class, quick drop your books
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and run into the hall to mill around! Can't be in class a second more than we
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have to 'eh?
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You're all beautiful people, but I don't want to touch you. Clear the
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halls.
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-Seth Sometimes
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School is typically portrayed as a non fun, rather boring, unexceptionally
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monotonous learning experience. With something to keep the students
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entertained, like a dog or elephant, school would most likely improve a bit.
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Allowing pets in school would be one of the most wonderful things that ever
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happened here, and besides some people get lonely around lunchtime, and need
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some company.
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There are a few negative aspects to having pets in school, like the strange
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50 ft chickens running rampant from the biology lab. There would be a few gang
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fights between vicious animals like wolverines and badgers. And there would be
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more tardies issued, because of pets walking their students.
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The good sides of having pets in school greatly outweigh the bad sides.
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Pets would help students stay sane in school, and they look pretty also. For
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instance those people who have no friends at school would finally have someone
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or something to accompany them. There would be all kinds of new food in the
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cafeteria like "Broiled Bunny Rabbit" or "Fido Pat<61>." Also, the money we will
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be making off the vending machines for pet food and snacks will raise the school
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budget.
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There would be no littering in class, for some student would have an animal
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that eats anything and everything that even pretends to move. Students that
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sleep in class could have a pillow, or for the student that can never get
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comfortable, a foot rest.
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You could easily load all your books onto a pack mule . . . you could even
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load your self onto the mule! It would eliminate many parking problems, because
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students would ride their pets to school. Finally, we would better educate our
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pets, so that one day they might be world leaders.
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The issue of pets in school is viewed as a wonderful idea. In a poll, two
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out of three Seths agree that pets on campus should be considered by the school
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board for the 1995 school year. Think of all the good times you and your pet
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have had together at home, and think of all the good times you and your pet will
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have at school.
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-Lasher
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--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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/-----------------------***** GwD Propagandists *****--------------------------\
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| Lobo - Seth Sometimes - The Lizard King - Spanky McDougal, Sir! - Sir Flea |
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| Zippy - Aracnia - Zen - Trojan-Man - fastjack - Diamondback - Bill Hooper |
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| Lasher |
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\------------------------------------------------------------------------------/
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------------------------------[GwD Command Centers]-----------------------------
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Chaos (806)797-7501 | Brazen's Hell (301)776-8259
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GridPoint Durant (405)920-1347 | Pirate's Cove (806)795-4926
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Federation Slayers' (806)798-8168 | The Anti BBS (806)763-3549
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The Snake's Den (806)793-3779 | PCI (806)792-3302
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The Siege Perilous (806)762-0948 | The Sprawl (806)797-0820
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--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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/---------------\
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copyright (c) 1994 by Seth Sometimes and Lasher of GwD Inc. :FIGHT THE POWER:
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GREENY world Domination Task Force copyright (c) 1993 by Lobo: GwD :
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All rights reserved \---------------/
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