196 lines
9.5 KiB
Plaintext
196 lines
9.5 KiB
Plaintext
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<20> <20><><EFBFBD> <20> <20> <20>
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<20><> <20><> <20> <20> <20>
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<20> <20> <20> <20> <20>
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BLaH <20> <20> <20> <20><><EFBFBD> <20> <20>
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File <20><><EFBFBD> <20> <20><> <20><><EFBFBD><EFBFBD><EFBFBD> Written March 20, 1994
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#043 <20> <20>ig <20>ong <20><><EFBFBD> <20>nd <20> <20>airy
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<20> <20> <20> <20> <20> <20> <20>
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<20><><EFBFBD> <20><><EFBFBD><EFBFBD> <20><><EFBFBD><EFBFBD><EFBFBD> <20><> <20><>
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Presents
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<20> <20><> <20>
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"I Came, I Saw, I..."
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<20> by <20>
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Guido Sanchez
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<20> <20><> <20>
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----------
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was jaded:
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hah.. a year ago I wrote the BLaH cum-bak file.. rebirth of BLaH and all that..
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what a joke.. just called up obloid sphere in another "window".. hah..
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I'm on a 486dx33 with 5 megs of ram and I feel like a fool every time some
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warez geek asks me what kind of computer I've got and I oblige him flawlessly
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with one breath... I see all these groups spawned by BLaH, or at least paying
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homage, like PuD, MiLK, Propaganda Unlimited.. pretty incredible to say the
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least.. I get mail from people on boards telling me that they loved BLaH, it
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sure was funny, but they don't understand what it means when I reply "3y3 sed
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mah FaRtZZZzzz sh0rrrre iZ ZtinK333"...hell, I sit down to write a BLaH file
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and I can't even remember what number I'm on... call up Obloid Sphere, and I
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can't even add a voting question.. download the files and remember their
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names.. remember going through and editing them, or writing them if they were
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mine.. remember talking to Connie on the phone "wouldn't it be great if we
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could.." remember on a 300 baud Kaypro ][ with MITE term program.. still on
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2400 though, not that you all care.. great clause that relenquishes me from
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any "mis"perception of poserishness from you.. "who cares" is the phrase that
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allows you to abdicate any responsibilty for what you say.. not that it matters
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is another one.. I look through BLaH, old stuff and new, and cringe when people
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greet me with "that stuff was great!" or "oh yah, I read your stuff". I'm
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like every other pseudo-intellectual aspiring artist coffeehouse genX'r who
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thinks that all his previous work was crap.. and it was.. but I revel in my
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media, I suppose, and damn the message.. hah.. was watching Renegade on TV
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today.. there was a guy arguing that he wasn't doing it for the result but
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the process.. the thrill and all that.. human beings are processes, a stretch
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in the rubber band of our biosphere.. science teaches that nature strives to
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reach a lowest possible anything.. be it lowest possible energy level of
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electron clouds, be it decay radioactive or otherwise, be it the very force
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of gravity that makes us possible.. so what are humans? a spike in the rubber-
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band of evolution, eventually going to snap back to normal.. point is, in the
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beginning there was nothing, in the end there will be nothing.. we _are_ the
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middle.. a process that will be undone soon enough, but we matter anyway..
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because we're the only thing capable of mattering.. mathematics.. even
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computers, are just virtual platforms built on a well of 1s and 0s.. computers
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interpret and make a big thing about binary numbers, make virtual causes and
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effect within the platform and while we should never lose sight of the fact
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that it's JUST a platform, you've gotta take into account the fact that it's
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the platform that made you and contains you.. human beings when you get right
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down to it are merely discernation machines between chaos and order.. we search
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for order continuously in an attempt to scythe away the unknown.. from our
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first blurry blobs that we came to know as mom and dad to the extrapolation
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of what is inherently good and what was inherently evil, we look for patterns.
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And we act on these patterns.. that's what's so bullshit about the whole P.C.
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anti-stereotype crusade.. Human beings are creatures that are built of
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stereotype and prejudging. What am I saying? Nothing.. just feeling the
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thrill of confusion.. I always said that the best way to confuse someone
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was to give them unlimited choices.. be it cable tv or buying a car, you
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can take advantage of these things.. noticing patterns and all.. the
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cyclical nature of behavior and indeed BLaH itself.. okay, fuck this,
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BLaH is back, faster than you can say que la fuerza este con usted..
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------------
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was spanish:
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it's the number one show on TV worldwide, it's <20>SABADO GIGANTE! With Don
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Francisco.. aka Mario Kroitzberger.. some guy from central europe with a
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flair for spanish.. I always get a kick out of the english influence on
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the show and culture it represents.. "Esteban y Carlos tocos los discos
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en la biblioteca. Yo tengo PEPSI COLA, es muy frio." regardless of
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chatline and Irc assholes who call me a fucking spic, the result of many
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years in texan school systems leaves me a bit wanting in the art of
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conversation.
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---------
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was done:
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girls that are innocent try to prove that they're guilty, and guilty
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ones try to prove that they're innocent.. call her innocent and she
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claims she's not and is on her back faster than you can say Gloria
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Steinham <sp>.
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Speaking of which, I found something in the newspaper the other day that's
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sure to be worth millions in the years to come. That riot of a comic strip,
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Cathy, of which I'm a regular reader, printed an error last week... in this
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one strip, NOT A SINGLE TEAR OF SWEAT WAS FLYING FROM ANY CHARACTER AT ALL.
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Needless to say, that one's going into the safety deposit box along with
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<insert joke here>.
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--------------
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was conquered:
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fine, here's a damn top ten list for you assholes who skip through
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tfiles instead of pouring through, committing each line to memory like
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you should... BURN ALL OTHER TFILES, BLAH HAS RETURNED DAMNIT..
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Top Ten Reasons I'm A Fuck
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--------------------------
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10. I just thought of a punchline to that Cathy joke and I'm too damn
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lazy to go back and add it in. ["along with that one episode of Fred
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Basset that was actually funny"]
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9. I think of titles of issues of BLaH before I think of topics.
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8. His name was Rico, he wore a diamond..
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7. Self-pity, self-loathing, self-domination
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6. No future and no penis
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5. Joey Buttafuoco
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4. After I write this I'm going to turn on the TV, find a good fuck
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movie and wack on, wack off..
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3. Shit, it's 2am .. all the good ones are probably over by now.. wait,
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it's a Saturday night.. I dunno
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2. Too much influence over those easily influenced
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1. Profundity doesn't come very easy to me.
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------------
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was flipped:
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hah.. I do that a lot.. get a word any word, and then find the perfect
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acronym definition for it.. see that dash separator up there? the ---
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thingie? I did that first, and then stopped at an arbitrary length and
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typed whatever, knowing that it would fill it all the way.. maybe I'm
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watched over, maybe i'm naive, maybe it's subconscious, but the second
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highest thing I believe with the most conviction <yes, there's a drop or
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two left in me> is that things will ALWAYS work out.. I could be 30
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miles away at 2am and have no way of getting home, but I have the faith
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that things will work out.. and I've sure as hell gotten more than my
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share of positive reinforcement because things always DO work out..
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there's always a cheezy blaze 103.5 fm rockin schaumburg guy who'll give
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me a ride 30 miles out of his way.. I go out and don't plan a when and
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how I'll be back, I just know that I will... because what's the
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alternative? Death, of course... the alternative is the nothingness that
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is synonymous with death.. that's the burden of recognizing no god.. is
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that when you die, you die.. to be an atheist is to be an ignorant fool.
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Theists too. You'll find out soon enough what happens when you die, why
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worry about it now.
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---------
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was BLaH:
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Moral to this shit is that BLaH is.. vague at best, and it's the very
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best indeed. Releases will be when I feel like it.. what I need now is
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to spew <almost used the verb write> out some silly crappy release
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that'll make joe Q warez laugh his 0-2 day ass off.. and still it gives
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me pleasure, catering to people. I still feel empty feelings inside and
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nothing will placate me. fuck this.. okay, I'm wacky again.. got gn00
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ideas for gn00 filez... gn00 beginning? probably not.. the same old shit
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recycled from conversations you've never heard but will see the
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embellishment of in these tfiles.. the way god intended. Fuck You.
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Love, Me.
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<*** End of Rant ***>
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<-Propaganda and Shit---------------------------------------------------->
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BLaH is Big Long and Hairy, a tfile group for writers who want exposure,
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fame and fortune, and a BLaH Prez Baseball Cap. Those interested in
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joining should form your own damn group. What I can do you can do it
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better. Not to promote isolationism, but in a global society with an
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increasingly homogenous culture, spikes of individuality are precious
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few. Why taint it by joining together with someone else.
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People who think that was crap are encouraged to contact Guido Sanchez on
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any board anywhere or through internet at sanchez@foley.ripco.com.
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BLaH - Where we don't know what we think.
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BLaH Support Boards - Where to get the fileZzz <sIgH>tZZz
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Nun-Beaters Anonymous <708> 251-5094 - my place
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The Obloid Sphere <708> 965-3098
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Look for hardcopy BLaHzine, a collection of PrintShop clip art and zany
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yet socially relevant cartoons, stories, essays, etc.. at your more
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obscure bookhouses and coffeestores.
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<---PUT THE FUCKING LOTION IN THE BASKET--------------------------------->
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