537 lines
16 KiB
Plaintext
537 lines
16 KiB
Plaintext
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"Blink, did you see the half moon?"
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"Wow, Shimmer. What a sight."
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To The Editor of ATI:
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Either go to a 40-45character line
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length, or take me off your mailing list
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From: "Real Name:" (210)
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g
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r
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t
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n
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g
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s
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n
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d
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w
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l
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c
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m
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2
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AAAA TTTTT IIIII
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A A T I
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AAAA T I
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A A T I
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A A T IIIII
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ACTIVELY, TRYING 2 INVESTIGATE.
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issue # 161
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9901110111
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1234, we don't need your heretofore,
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5678, latinsufixurgitate.
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Numbers, numbers. here r sum #'s
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http://www.historybuff.com
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http://www.abbiemovie.com
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http://www.walmartsucks.com
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http://www.dirtmagazine.com
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http://www.infiltration.com
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Hey.
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Go to http://www.phobe.com/furby/
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They dissected a Furby and had a
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"Furby Autopsy." It's pretty funny.
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http://www.sorabji.com/livewire/payphones
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http://www.well.com/user/jd
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http://www.freespeech.org/kokopeli/column.html
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http://www.napsnet.com
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"You can fool 48% of the
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people 63% of the time."
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-Ed Margulies
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PUBLISHER'S COLUMN.
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Well, that's all we needed to hear.
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40 columns it is, then. Tell U true?
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I have a softspot in my heart 4 40col.
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Brings me back to my atari 8bit days.
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6502. U know. Like the one that's
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prolly in your fave talking doll.
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Or your toaster. Or your toothpaste?
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Anyways, lemme know how you like our
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"new look." If you look at issues
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1-25ish though, you'll see it's kinda
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sorta like a great coming back.
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Shut up, Odysseus.
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prime audi...
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N Y S E - - - - -
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P Q
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- - - - -
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140 9/16 50 3/8 PAP 1.5 310 2480
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80 1/8 70 5/8 80 1/8 +9 1/8
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erp,gup,lug,sug,puk,pus,gor,kop,fud...
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Letters?
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heh, eh, hck, we get letters...
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Yes we still publish the iron feather
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journal. Here is the current
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contact infos:
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Iron Feather Journal
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po box 1905
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boulder CO 80306
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http://mycal.net/ifj
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stevyn@edj.net
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We are working on the new issue,
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IFJ#16, right now and hope to get it
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finished in a few weeks.
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Always looking for cool infos,
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contacts, GFX, etc.
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Have a happy 99, Stevyn
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AT. FONE TONE.
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Letter to the Editor:
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Marco,
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my man. it's good to hear you've
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back to talkin' guitar. Even if
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it *is* just folk and classical and
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such now that you've getting old.
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<g>
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I think my fondest mem. of ATI was
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always when y'all exposed the AT&T
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dialtone for containing a 440 A in it
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so you can tune your gitbox anywhere
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on earth where there's a fone.
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I bet it still works.
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Cypher (305)
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DEAR ATI,
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On that Desert Fox Angola thing.
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Are you suggesting hundred(s)
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were killed in "Fox" and then
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the plane went down in Angola with
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the bodies? Or did it go down
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on purpose with the bodies to cover up?
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Or did Muldar really see his sister?
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Sorry, confused on the Fox issue.
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What are you saying???!!!!
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DON (617)
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to ati@etext.org
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Gen. Zinni made a freudslip out there
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he called this mission Desert Storm.
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And didn't even correct hisself!
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Just think, I served under that
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incompetant boob so many years ago!
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Anthony. US Army Ret.
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President SFJA,
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Member, Gainesville Chap.
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[ed note: great to see SFJA (soldiers
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first, journalists always) still kikkin
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'round. It was always soooo hard 2 start
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unions inside the military. Some of our
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finest tiny coups...]
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Yo Prime,
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Where's that grand
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over by NORAD?
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Gotta Run,
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Agent Steal (213)
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Carlo,
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thought you may like this..
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also///forward to marco for his ATI.
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talk soon.
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AOL...awesome. (203)
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Ghandi was a remarkable Indian Mystic
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who walked thousands of miles barefoot,
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developed thick callouses. Fasted for
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months, became very fragile, and was
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cursed with bad breath from starving
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himself. He was a:
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Super Calloused Fragile Mystic
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Hexed with Halitosis!
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to ati@etext.org
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Wow, Marco, you're good. Damn good.
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Not only did all those links actually
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work, but you also invented the phrase
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"ebasket of pears", which is without
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a doubt the funniest thing I've read
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all day.
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Jeff (785)
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Hi,
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Look again, at your message[following].
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Sure, quote me, if you like.
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And add, if it suits you, that as a
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CIS professional, I recommend that people
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set their computers to display in 12, or
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14 point fonts, to reduce eyestrain,
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and to help 50year old eyes like mine to
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read it at all .
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Don't take this as permenant
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permission to quote me, I frequently respond
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to newsletters with personal anecdotes,
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and the last thing I want to do, is to read
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them in distribution .
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I do try to remember to preface
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messages with all caps warnings, when I'm
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sensitive about how they're to be used.
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Stay Stronger,
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Ken. (210)
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--- --- ---
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Headlice:
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MONICA DRINKS BRANDY
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MENAGE RUMORS IN CLINTON WHITEHOUSE
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EVIDENCE OF DUST SPOTTED AROUND
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RINGS OF AGING ROCK STARS
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ROCKY MOUNTAIN TESTICLE FESTIVAL LOOKING
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FOR NEW CELEBRITY OYSTER SHUCKER
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GINGRICH: IRAQ IS NEXT VIETNAM -
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CLINTON INSISTS WWI
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HILLARY EATS PEACH
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CHELSEA STEPS DOWN FROM STUDENT
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COUNCIL. SAYS SHE'LL RUN FOR '00
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JESSE BODYSLAMS HULK HOGAN
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KATHLEEN WILLY FATHERS ILLEGITIMATE LAMA
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NEWSPAPER BEATS LOTT WITH ROLLED UP DOG
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ARNOLD: WON'T RUN - RATHER KEEP RIDING HMMWV
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12 YEAR OLD VETERAN COURT MARTIALED FOR
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FRATERNIZING WITHOUT SEEKING MOM'S PERMISSION
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MAN GETS 6-YRS FOR ORDERING PIZZA
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TO SOMEONE ELSE'S HOUSE
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LEWIS & CLARK COLLEGE NAME
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CHANGE: LEWINSKI & COLLEGE
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REHNQUIST FINDS OUT HE'S PART JEWISH;
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SECOND COUSIN OF ALBRIGHT
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#
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Tone Can Ruin A Good Book
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by C.D. Reviewer. Special to ATI
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for Book of the Week Club.
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"THE SHADOW UNIVERSITY: The Betrayal
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Of Liberty On America's Campuses,"
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by Alan Charles Kors and Harvey A.
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Silvergate.
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This was the most boring book I've
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ever read I think. The topic was so
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compelling I tried to stick with it
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from beginning to end, but I must confess.
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I put it down many times. To be nice
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I shall say it was dry reading.
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It was a brilliant collaboration
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between two New Jersey men who met at
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Princeton in the 60's and they set out
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to tackle such issues as the famous
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"Water Buffalo" case, and assaults on
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student speech and also faculty speech.
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I couldn't wait to read it, but then
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I was quite let down by their writing
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style.
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I think you should try to read it
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anyhow. It's a very important book.
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But good luck getting past the writing
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style.
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SAN CRISTOBAL DE LAS CASAS, Mexico (Reuters) --
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Mexico has resumed expelling foreigners from
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the embattled state of Chiapas, and in doing
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so has reignited a human rights debate.
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The government has made it clear that it
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considers many foreigners meddlesome activists,
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while human rights groups insist that Mexico is
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targeting those seeking to be peaceful
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observers. The U.S. non-governmental organisation
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Global Exchange said on Wednesday one of its
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members was expelled on Monday from the southern
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state, the battleground of a five-year standoff
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between authorities and Zapatistas.
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Two other U.S. citizens were "invited" to leave
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the country while an Italian and a Japanese
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tourist were "interrogated" about their
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activities in Chiapas, Global Exchange
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representative Ernesto Ledesma told Reuters.
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#
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PRESS RELEASE:
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A benefit concert for the Sovereign
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Dineh Nation is taking place at the
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House of BLues in LA 17Jan Doors open:
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8pm, music: 9. Tickets are $25.
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Big names on the bill include Indigenous
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and John Trudell. Rumour has it that
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Stevie Wonder may show up.
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The event is part of the annual MLK/HofB
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Foundation awards.
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[ed note: I confirmed all this through
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the people at NAMMYS (native american
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music awards) and also that Burning
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Sky will be playing.=)
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Black Mesa Indigenous Support (BMIS)
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will be bringing a van, rented by SOL
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Communications and 6-8 Dineh to LA for
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one week. During that week the elders
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will participate in press conferences,
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radio shows, concert and ceremony.
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They may travel on to SF to attend
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the Many Beads court. As you know
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the Many Beads case has been
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going on for years.
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I sincerely hope that BMIS finds the tools
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they need to get the elders through the
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winter. They go up on the mountain each
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weekend, cutting wood, herding sheep,
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being a taxi or whatever they are asked.
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Please support this group.
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# is 520 773-8086.
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Leave message for Dixie or Daniel.
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-Mauro
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SOL Communications
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1 888 41PRAYER
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#
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ATI - The Web Offset Press
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That is NOT a HOE.
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THIS FROM THE "DO NOT PUB" BOX:
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Not a week goes by here at ATI we don't
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have 2 or 3 stories kikkin 'round we choose
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to sit on. Oh, myriad reasons from "still
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checking accuracy," to "don't wanna get
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killed," with just about everything one
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could imagine in between.
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Rest assured, no one's ever called askin'
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the Times to kill a story in our 11-year
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history on the net or even before that on
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pape. (sic.)
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We'd laugh if they did, to be honest. Our
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endeavors have been successful thus far with
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a news-to-ad ratio of 1:0 for all these years.
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We're surely not wealthy, but solvent.
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So guess what? Mostly we just couldn't care
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less. That's a pretty good feeling, actually.
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Not to brag, but most other groups of newsies
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have had to play that balance like an antique
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Stradavarius tuned up to concert 440.
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So today, there's one story from that box
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that we suddenly felt better of this morning
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or so, so here goes:
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It's an official PAP prediction.
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Larry Flynt will "out" Phil Gramm this week
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sometime; then Ted Kennedy will try to have
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Flynt shot.
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<ducking>
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OK. Take it easy. Keep your head down. I must
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go now, and put a pop-bottle on my doorknob.
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Me voy.
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NeW CoMiX: FogHaRt - LeGhARt.
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The adventures of Joe Lockhart and the
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big hairy bird - EMU.
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lutenist@geocities.com for ordering info.
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Making the world safe for Wolfe
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Blitzkrieg's UnionStation WhiteStore
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credit card bill.
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Rehnquist Says He Can Already
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Taste Clinton Trial
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---------------
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by Lori Associa
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Special corres.
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---------------
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<PAWN>
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Washington - Chief Justice William P. Rehnquist
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criticized Kenneth Storr on Thursday for being
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perhaps too lenient on the "ex-president-elect."
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"Only four articles??" Rehnquist rhetoricized
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in his annual year-end report on Democrat-
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bashing and its attempt to get declared an
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Olympic sport by 2008.
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"I think you were a little easy on the Beev,
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Wally," the Justice said amid uproarious laughs,
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heaves and guffaws.
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During his top-secret one-hour tour of the
|
|||
|
|
Senate chamber and its anti-rooms Thursday, he
|
|||
|
|
allowed this author to get a quick interview
|
|||
|
|
in under tight security.
|
|||
|
|
"I've been just licking my chops," he told
|
|||
|
|
me, "ever since Desert Fox began."
|
|||
|
|
He offered me a cigar from the pocket of
|
|||
|
|
his half off jacket, then apologized for not
|
|||
|
|
asking if smoking was OK.
|
|||
|
|
He explained he was very tired from 57,691
|
|||
|
|
cases in one year and that he just wanted to
|
|||
|
|
relax with a pretty young girl on her way up
|
|||
|
|
over a nice fresh "Cuban seed Cuban."
|
|||
|
|
He said he'd love to share one with me,
|
|||
|
|
popping Viagra like a fiend.
|
|||
|
|
I told him I'd gotten all I needed, that
|
|||
|
|
I wasn't offended and that if he didn't mind
|
|||
|
|
I was going to kick him really hard somewhere
|
|||
|
|
and then take my leave.
|
|||
|
|
The already half-naked old law-subvert
|
|||
|
|
reached down to cover where he thought I
|
|||
|
|
might attack leaving himself completely open
|
|||
|
|
to the idea of my sticking his smelly old
|
|||
|
|
Cuban contraband where he'll never find it
|
|||
|
|
without corrective surgery.
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
[ed note: Bill was last seen fully clothed
|
|||
|
|
on the sidewalk in front of the Pennsylvania
|
|||
|
|
Ave. Kinkos in the fetal position blubbering
|
|||
|
|
madly.]
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
SMURF-STONED MERGER SETS OFF PAPERWARS
|
|||
|
|
<PAWN>
|
|||
|
|
New York - The paper industry will likely
|
|||
|
|
see more death and carnage in 1999 with
|
|||
|
|
Smurf purchasing Stoned Container Corp.,
|
|||
|
|
Texacold, Amicable and British Far-Troleum
|
|||
|
|
all in one 24-hour period just three days
|
|||
|
|
before 1998's end, an analyst said.
|
|||
|
|
Despite all the new acquisitions, the
|
|||
|
|
analyst said, the month-old mega-corporation
|
|||
|
|
will keep its current name, Smurf-Stoned.
|
|||
|
|
On the pallet for 1999, according to sources,
|
|||
|
|
is the purchase of cardboard boxes, heavy
|
|||
|
|
brown paper, hundred dollar bills, and
|
|||
|
|
balance sheets of anyone else who wants to
|
|||
|
|
"just roll over and die."
|
|||
|
|
Smurf-Stoned is also considering working
|
|||
|
|
with International Scraper and Union Cramp
|
|||
|
|
to market the idea of wrapping dead people
|
|||
|
|
in brown paper instead of the more expensive
|
|||
|
|
and eco-unfriendly caskets.
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
<PA>worldnewz can always be reached at:
|
|||
|
|
http://www.thepentagon.com/primeanarchist
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
IT STARTED WITH A SWEAR: An Exercise In Hostility.
|
|||
|
|
by Monique Nixon
|
|||
|
|
Special To Prime Anarchist World News
|
|||
|
|
(PAWN) - Seymour, WI.
|
|||
|
|
Oh, and two Furby dolls.
|
|||
|
|
Since there were plenty of Furby's left
|
|||
|
|
at Walkmart, Toes 'R Us, and Wilworth-Wilco
|
|||
|
|
I bought two at my local retailer. Set me back a
|
|||
|
|
mere 30 bucks. From then 'til yesterday (Jan 1)
|
|||
|
|
I'd had them in seperate rooms digesting much TV.
|
|||
|
|
One got its learning entirely from non-stop NBC.
|
|||
|
|
The other was glued to MTV 24-7.
|
|||
|
|
As I suspected there was a generation gap of
|
|||
|
|
sorts from the very beginning. I faced them
|
|||
|
|
toward each other in a walk-in closet with a voice-
|
|||
|
|
activated microcassett recorder nearby. I planned
|
|||
|
|
to change a 90-minute tape on slow speed every 4
|
|||
|
|
or 5 hours.
|
|||
|
|
Neither said a word to each other for twenty
|
|||
|
|
whole minutes, so I altered the experiment,
|
|||
|
|
deciding to get things rolling saying the word,
|
|||
|
|
"shit."
|
|||
|
|
I guess the NBC-fed doll had never heard the
|
|||
|
|
word because she, he or it started in with "what
|
|||
|
|
the hell did you just say? Because I don't
|
|||
|
|
understand you, and it sounded like crap." How
|
|||
|
|
he'd learned Wolf Blitzer's voice perfectly in
|
|||
|
|
both tone and syntax I'll never know.
|
|||
|
|
Well the MTV Furby must not be used to the
|
|||
|
|
word "crap" because s/h/it broke in with "Oh
|
|||
|
|
my God. That was, like rad, I mean no way, man
|
|||
|
|
take a picture of my butt. Does she go down on
|
|||
|
|
you in a theatre? Scratch your fingernails down
|
|||
|
|
my back, oh nice ass, let's eat at Hooters."
|
|||
|
|
I swear s/he sounded just like Jesse, the
|
|||
|
|
enviro-retarded heroin-addict wannabe VJ.
|
|||
|
|
I didn't hear NBC's retort but when I
|
|||
|
|
returned to change cassettes one of the dolls
|
|||
|
|
was on top of the other doing something
|
|||
|
|
horribly obscene saying "calls are just
|
|||
|
|
35 dollars a minute, order now, operators are
|
|||
|
|
standing by," while the other was just laying
|
|||
|
|
there saying, "it's freezing in here, I don't
|
|||
|
|
think you love me anymore... is there a room
|
|||
|
|
I can darken? I need to perform an autopsy."
|
|||
|
|
---------------
|
|||
|
|
http://www.solcommunications.com/mauro/video.html
|
|||
|
|
And now, Mauro's message:
|
|||
|
|
---------------
|
|||
|
|
I have a 28:30 second "underground"
|
|||
|
|
cable show called "The Battle of Big
|
|||
|
|
Mountain". I had given Klandiken some
|
|||
|
|
copies and ISCO in Oregon. This is
|
|||
|
|
not the documentary that we have been
|
|||
|
|
working on, but it does contain
|
|||
|
|
footage that no doubt is in that piece.
|
|||
|
|
Anyway many people have asked me about
|
|||
|
|
the cable show. I will send a copy
|
|||
|
|
to any BIg Mountain group that wants it.
|
|||
|
|
Since I will be paying for the copies and
|
|||
|
|
mailing I just ask that only groups or
|
|||
|
|
people that intend on educating with it
|
|||
|
|
reply. Also, any group working with the
|
|||
|
|
nuclear issues please contact me as well.
|
|||
|
|
We made a similar piece during Corbin Harney's
|
|||
|
|
event at the Mercury gate last spring
|
|||
|
|
and it came out great. Both pieces
|
|||
|
|
have great interviews, The Battle of
|
|||
|
|
Big Mountain with John Benally,
|
|||
|
|
Roberta Blackgoat, Marsha Monestersky,
|
|||
|
|
Norman Benally and others. There is
|
|||
|
|
also a music video called Amerika
|
|||
|
|
that I made as well.
|
|||
|
|
For the record, no exempt monies
|
|||
|
|
were used in these productions.
|
|||
|
|
Mauro (SOL)
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
===================
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
as tradition begs us: we end w/ poem:
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
i never did understand the crash of 29
|
|||
|
|
by Clifford Stabbert
|
|||
|
|
Reprinted From Usenet
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
the crops still grew but nobody harvested
|
|||
|
|
factory still there but nobody at the belt
|
|||
|
|
bricks and mortar just lay gathering dust
|
|||
|
|
it was all a bad dream
|
|||
|
|
of numbers on a wall
|
|||
|
|
let's do things right this time
|
|||
|
|
i will harvest i will sew
|
|||
|
|
you can join me
|
|||
|
|
let me know
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Happy B-day and a lb. of pot 2:
|
|||
|
|
Jimmy Page, Joan Baez, Bob Denver
|
|||
|
|
& Dave Matthews.
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
ATI would like 2 thank:
|
|||
|
|
Snap!, Winona Spyder, Bob Jr, George,
|
|||
|
|
Abbie!, Ace Bumpersticker Co.,
|
|||
|
|
SmashTheTV, Bob Donovan, Cygnus, FahQ-2
|
|||
|
|
Neil Strauss, and the usual bunch of
|
|||
|
|
scrubs. (or was that scrunch of bubs?)
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
INGREDIENTS: ...Natural and Artificial
|
|||
|
|
Flavors...
|
|||
|
|
Umm...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|