189 lines
5.2 KiB
Groff
189 lines
5.2 KiB
Groff
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From werner Wed Jul 13 14:06:34 1988
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Flags: 000000000001
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From: ross@smokey.ua.oz.au (Ross Williams)
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Subject: Breakthrough in Computer Science Educational Technology.
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Keywords: funny, original
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Date: 26 Sep 88 15:30:03 GMT
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Organization: Computer Science, University of Adelaide, Sth. Australia
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HORIZONS IN COMPUTER SCIENCE EDUCATIONAL TECHNOLOGY
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===================================================
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By Ross Williams 3 June 1988.
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Recent studies have shown that while undergraduate students are more intelligent
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than kindergarten students, the mentality and attention span of the two groups
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are similar. With this in mind, we introduce a new concept in Computer Science
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education:
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COMPUTER SCIENCE SESAME STREET
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==============================
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Narrator:
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One of these programs is not like the others,
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One of these programs has a bug.
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One of these programs is not like the others,
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And if you can't tell which one, you're a mug.
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One of these programs is not like the others,
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One of these programs will really teach yer,
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One of these programs is not like the others,
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Yes, that's not a bug, that's a feature.
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----------
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Voiceover:
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c
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C
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C?
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C!
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printf!
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while ((c=getchar() != EOF) {}
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C!
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----------
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Song:
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Dum diddle diddle diddle dum de dum dum,
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Dum diddle diddle diddle,
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1
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2
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3
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4
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5
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6
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7
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8
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9
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A
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B
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C
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D
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E
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F
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----------
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Narrator: Hello Oscar, how are you today?
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Oscar the Grouch: Go away: I've just found a new garbage collection algorithm.
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Narrator: Tell me about it Oscar....
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----------
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Kermit: This is Kermit the Frog reporting for Sesame Street news. Today, we
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interview Professor Biskit who works on cookie biosearch. Hello Professor
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Biskit, what have you got there?
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Prof: Arcchhh, I am trying to find out iv there is zarch a sing as an infinitely
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long coorkie. Dis machine vill produce every sort of coorkie possible: big
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cookies, dittle cookies, square cookies, round cookies. The cookies come out dis
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hole here.
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Kermit: You mean if you get a really long cookie, it will come out of the hole
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like a sausage?
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Prof: Yaaaass, that's right. Now I vill set de machine going, and ve can start
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vatching de corkies.
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GRRRRUNNNCCHHHH CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA...
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Prof: Aass here comes one,... CLUNK
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Cookie Monster: Cooooookie! Chomp.
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Prof: Und another. Dis one eees square: CLUNK.
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Kermit: Uh professor...
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Prof: Don't bother me now, I'm vatchin coorkies.
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Kermit: What if there isn't an infinitely long cookie?
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Prof: Then they vill come out of dis machine forever - there are an infinite
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number of possible corkies you know.
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Kermit: And what if the machine starts making an infinitely long cookie?
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Prof: Thats obvious you frogk, I vill have to vait for it to come out.
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Kermit: And how long will that take?
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Prof: Forever.
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Kermit: So if there isn't an infinitely long cookie, you have to wait forever
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and if there is, you have to wait forever too. How are you going to find out if
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there is an infinitely long cookie today?
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Prof: Don't interrupt. Here comes a triangular one viff purple spots.
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Cookie monster: CRUNCH. GULP.
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Prof: My machine!
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Kermit: Well, it looks as if the cookie monster has transcended the question of
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whether there is an infinitely long cookie by eating the cookie machine. A good
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thing as the computation was UNCOMPUTABLE.
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----------
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Narrator: Hello Big Bird. What's all this mess?
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Big Bird: I'm planting a binary tree. That way, I can nest in it and I won't
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have to fly South for the winter.
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Narrator: How long will it take for the tree to grow tall enough?
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Big Bird: If I add branches randomly it will take me log_2(t)/1.386.
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Narrator: Tell me why, Big Bird?
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...
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----------
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This program has been brought to you by the language C and the number F.
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This has been a production of the Computer Science Television Workshop.
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--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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COMPUTER SCIENCE YOUNG ONES
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===========================
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Neil: Ow, WOW heavy! My lentil binary trees are growing exponentially.
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Vivian: This calls for a subtle combination of mathematics and extreme violence.
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Rick: Oh you couldn't theorize even if you picked your nose with a silicon chip.
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Vivian: OK, watch! This is how you dismantle a binary tree in constant time...
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CRUNCH, CHOP, CRASH...
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Neil: WOW. Heavy. Look at the mess. Look at all the garbage!
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Garbage: Now they'll try to clean me up in constant time, but they've forgotten
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about all those cycles caused by curly lentils...
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Vivian: Oh no we didn't because I cut all the cycles before I chopped down the
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tree...
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Rick: You can't do that in linear time! What sort of a snotty nosed gullible
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girlie do you think I am?
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Vivian: Well I had him fooled!
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Neil: No you didn't! I was just waiting for the tree to spontaneously
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re-assemble.
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.....
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--
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Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes to watmath!looking!funny .
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Attribute the joke's source if at all possible. I will reply, mailers willing.
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Remember: If you POST your joke instead of mailing it, I will not reply.
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