264 lines
8.4 KiB
Standard ML
264 lines
8.4 KiB
Standard ML
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Rich DaDante is known as "The Goon", or "Dadadada Dadante", and sometimes
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they even call him "Dee-Dant"(said with a lot of stress, like 'DEEEEEE-Dant!'.
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In the yearbook, he looks like Richard Nixon, so they mock him by saying, "I
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am not a goon." (instead of "I am not a quitter", which Nixon said, you dork)..
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If you would like a picture of him, write to him at:
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Ricardo DeeDant
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4243 West 62 Street
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Parma, Ohio 44144
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Or call him at <216>/398-0405.
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The Revenge of the Two-Faced Vojta Bottle continues. . .
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As I will now recite a poem. I call it "The Laboratory".
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_______________________________________________________________________________
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W A R N I N G
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This work of insanity requires an open mind and the utmost attention.
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Do not laugh at the forces that surround us, especially the forces of one's
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mind. You never know who is watching, or what will happen when you end up
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watching someone. Don't try to outsmart the unknown, and recite this work of
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art in your head, and you will be guaranteed to live at least until you are
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finished reading.
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_______________________________________________________________________________
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ANCIEN REGIME
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Now that I, tying thy glass mask tightly,
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May gaze through these faint smokes curling whitely,
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As thou pliest thy trade in this devil's smithy --
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Which is the poison to poison her, prithee?
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He is with her; and they know that I know
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Where they are, what they do. They believe my tears
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flow
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While they laugh, laugh at me, at me fled to the drear
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Empty church, to pray God in, for them! -- I am here.
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Grind away, moisten and mash up thy paste,
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Pound at thy powder -- I am not in haste!
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Better sit thus, and observe thy strange things,
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Than go where men wait me and dance at the King's.
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That in the mortar -- you call it a gun?
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Ah, the brave tree whence such gold oozings come!
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And yonder soft phial, the exquisite blue,
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Sure to taste sweetly -- is that poison too?
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Had I but all of them, thee and thy treasures,
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What a wild crowd of invisible pleasures!
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To carry pure death in an earring, a casket,
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A signet, a fan mount, a filigree basket.
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Soon, at the King's, a mere lozenge to give
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And Pauline should have just thirty minutes to live!
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But to light a pastille, and Elise, with her head
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And her breast and her arms and her hands, should drop
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dead!
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Quick -- Is it finished? The color's too grim!
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Why not soft like the phial's, enticing and dim?
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Let it brighten her drink, let her turn it and stir,
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And try it and taste, ere she fix and prefer!
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What, a drop? She's not little, no minion like me!
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That's why she ensnared him; this never will free
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The soul from those masculine eyes -- say, "no!"
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To that pulse's magnificent come and go.
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For only last night, as they whispered, I brought
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My own eyes to bear on her so, that I thought
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Could I keep them one half minute fixed, she would
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fall,
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Shriveled; she fell not; yet this does it all!
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Not that I bid you spare her the pain!
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Let death be felt abd the proof remain;
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Brand, burn up, bite into its grace --
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He is sure to remember her dying face!
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Is it done? Take my mask off! Nay, be not morose;
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It kills her, and this prevents seeing it close:
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The delicate droplet, my whole fortune's fee!
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If it hurts her, beside, can it ever hurt me?
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Now, take all my jewels, gorge gold to your fill,
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You may kiss me, old man, on my mouth if you will!
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But brush this dust off me, lest horror it brings
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Ere I know it -- next moment I dance at King's!
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_______________________________________________________________________________
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Ah! The sweet smell of a fresh corpse makes me dance! A glossary is inserted
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here for those that do not understand some of the academic words in the poem:
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Glass Mask :a face mask worn for protection against poisonous fumes.
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prithee :I pray thee.
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Mortar :A bowl used to grind things into powder.
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Phial :1.small glass bottle 2.what's in a Phial Cabinet.
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Casket :jewelry box.
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Signet :Seal, probably on a ring.
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Lozenge :piece of candy.
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Pauline :the speaker would like to murder two other women as well,
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namely Pauline and Elise.
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Pastille :small candle used to perfume a room.
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Minion :here, a small person.
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_______________________________________________________________________________
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Getting off the subject of insane poetry, maybe we can chat a bit on iced
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tea. It is best when home-made and basked outside for a few hours in the
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hot summer sun. Than-kyo..
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OUCH! I stubbed my tow! (beep beep).
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@@@@!!!!@@@@
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!!FLORAL !! Not to get off the beaten path, but
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@@DESIGNS @@ if you have 40 columns, this shouldn't
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!!BY VIC !! be coming out well. Anyways, you're a
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@@@@!!!!@@@@ ugly dick for having only 40 columns
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and not upgrading, or buying a shithead
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40 column cOmputer in the first place.
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Forty Columns RULE! heh, do you
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suck my disk! have to use your
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printer to read
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files?
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not an exactly straight line. _____________________________________________
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/
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______________________/
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/
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/
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/
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/ But it CAN divide. 2 / 2 = 4. I just noticed, there is no
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/ division key on my computer. Does that me things don't
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/ divide in the computer world, they just multiply? (Kind
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/ of me to change the subject), __
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/ /\
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/ \___ The Lost Comma
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/
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_
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Your Comod0re C(_)m _ yoUter rules!
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/_)
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___/
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Yeaaahhh!
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Shhh! It's tyme to g0! Qw-eye-et! (rhymes with Diet).
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EAT YOUR DOG FOOD, JACK, OR YOU WON'T GET TO SUCK MOMMY'S PUSSY TODAY! NOW
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GET TO IT, AND I WILL LET YOU EAT ME OUT!
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(The preceding line of fowl language and gross human distortion may be deleted
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before you make a hard copy and tack it to your wall, locker, forehead, or
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whatever. But if you like it, it can stay.)
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_ __
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/\// \_\
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/ / E T A L L I C \ \
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< >
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w0w. I'm not even into thrash and I'm making thrash signs. What will mommy
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say? Oh shucks, it's tyme to go (stated twice.)
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_____________________+++++++++_+_+$^^^^^^^#&^^^^^##@@@!!!!!!!!!!!!!%%%%%%%%%%%
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% Ramble7.fun? What happened to the other 6? dhit #
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% %
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% If you thought that this file was at all inane and a waste of your %
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%time, by no means kall the following anti-kool boards (the uzers aren't %
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%ko0l at all. they LOVE TO TYPE IN LOWER CASE! DATS N0T KOOL U NO!!!!11! %
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%..and wait for ramble6.fun to come out...it'll explain all about lost sheep %
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%%%%#%%%%%%%%%%%%%55555%%%%%%#^*(^^^)^)))$@___!1@@@@!!1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!$$%%%%
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Oh. The numbers.
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404-659-0150 Generik board A
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800-848-1337 Amerikan Republik Board B
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011-44-1-930-4832 Queen Elizabeth's Good Tyme Too C
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216-241-0024 Tymenet Express illegel haker stuph for boys and girlz- D
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313-644-9968 Peabody's church and peanut factory...E
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914-238-8195 I'm not gonna tell you what this one is. That's because
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it really doesn't exist, actually. I just made up the
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number because I ran out of k00l b0ardz to kall, so don't
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kall it.
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______________________________________________________________.
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A>exit
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(>View:RAMBLE7.FUN
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[capture buffer: on]
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I'm Doctor kools and This FILE RULES!1
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:Upload Aborted
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DOWNLOADED FROM P-80 SYSTEMS...
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-------
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-KBC - -Kilroy was here-
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-File -
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-------
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============================
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This file taken from:
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The Sherwood Forest // Elite
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============================
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Pireate threasher.. mosher dude, did you get it?
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YEAH...THANKS FOR THE FILE. LOOKS COOL, BUT I
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DIDNT' FINISH READING IT YET. WELL LATER DUDE
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Yeah, later. %#3 @.:ATH
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_______________
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/ Hey...who /
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/wrote this /
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/worthless /
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/piece of shit,/
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/anyway? /
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/It sure wasn't/
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/me, /
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/--The Cruiser,/
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/I'd NEVER /
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/write shit /
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/like this! /
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\yeah, rite. \
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\We believe \
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\you. And this\
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\is a straight \
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\line... \
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\______________\
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