informis/textfiles
1
0
Fork 0
Code Issues Pull Requests Packages Projects Releases Wiki Activity
textfiles/bbs/KEELYNET/BIOLOGY/telepsyk.asc

331 lines
16 KiB
Plaintext
Raw Normal View History

Initial commit
2021-04-15 13:31:59 -05:00
(word processor parameters LM=8, RM=78, TM=2, BM=2)
Taken from KeelyNet BBS (214) 324-3501
Sponsored by Vangard Sciences
PO BOX 1031
Mesquite, TX 75150
August 17, 1990
courtesy of the Parapsychology Forum at 214-368-5474
--------------------------------------------------------------------
FROM TELECOMMUNICATIONS TO TELEPSYCHING
INTIMACY AT A DISTANCE
by
Maurice M. Small,Ph.D.
From a business or practical perspective the advantages of
electronic mail and real time live telecommunications are obvious
and clear. Thus for example, it speeds up the flow of information
and amongst many other things helps to eliminate the game of "phone
tag" (you are 'out' when I call and I am 'out' when you return my
call).
Similarly it allows you to very inexpensively set up an
electronic conference where geographically separated individuals can
'meet' and exchange information rapidly and conveniently. Presumably
the rapid growth of data ( as opposed to voice) communications usage
of our telephone systems as well as its predicted surpassing of
voice communications in terms of volume of usage are at least in
part a result of these perceived advantages.
Nevertheless there is another side to telecommunication which
is not specifically business or practically oriented; it is what I
will call the 'personal' use of telecommunications.
As with the business use of telecommunications, the personal
use is varied, probably even more so. It includes but is not limited
to the flirting between "DREAMYGIRL" and "TALLTEXAN" involving a
combination of OLM's ( private online messages ) and public real
time message in the OVER 30 room of QANTUMLINK's PEOPLE CONNECTION (
PC).
Similarly there is the somewhat regular private discussions
between DOCTOR and WINDYCINDY about her divorce on GEnie or there
is the rather heated thread of messages discussing child support on
COMPUSERVE's ISSUE SIG - special interest group .
What is unusual about these examples and an almost unlimited
number of others is that here are large numbers of varied
individuals interacting with each other in all the leisurely and
entertaining ways we would expect them to but in all likelihood very
few of them have ever laid eyes upon each other.
Everything is taking place electronically, at a distance.
Moreover there is a surprising vitality, vigor, openness, and
Page 1
sharing of oneself. In our culture such psychological intimacy is
usually limited to private settings between individuals well known
to each other. Here the interactions are often public and between
people who may have just met.
Using some of my own experiences as a window let us look at
some of the details of this 'intimacy at a distance'phenomena. I log
on to CIS (Compuserve) and get a message indicating that I have
email waiting.
I read my mail and lo and behold there is a note from a former
student of mine who I haven't heard from in several <20>ears. His
message is interesting in several ways. It is nice to hear after
several years from a former student and friend of the family but
more to the point, there is a 'magnetism' to his letter not unlike
the experience I have with good theatre and literature.
It jumps out at me. I answer his letter with one of my own,
filling him in on the changes that have happened since our last
meeting and inviting him to stay in contact. In about two weeks I
get a very surprising reply. Even more surprising than the openness
and intimate sharing of the letter is the refreshing absence of any
differential behavior. This is not a communication between a student
and his teacher but an intimate sharing between two close friends.
Intrigued by this I set up a luncheon meeting with my newly
found friend. Its amazing how much he has matured since we last
meet. At the luncheon I am disappointed because my former student is
just that - the deferential behavior is there in full force. Now
matter how I try the barrier is still there.
My potential new friend and I are trapped in the web of our
habitual patterns of interacting. He is my former student, friendly
but not a friend.
What has happened?
Given the characteristics of the telecommunications medium -
particularly the absence of the typical clues to social class and
status - we are free to react to each other as equals, individuals
who can and wish to share the intimate details of our lives. Given
face to face communication the symbols of our socio-economic and
cultural status are at least for the present irresistible and we
default to the old patterns of interacting. There is hope. By
continuing to share electronically we may yet overcome these
hurdles.
Let us peer through another window. I am at a CB party
sponsored by Compuserve being held at the Sheraton Hotel in
Merrimack NH.
CB like the original Citizen Band is the name Compuserve has
given to its realtime online telecommunications service. Only here
you have 2 bands of 40 channels each and can reach a national and
often international audience. In the room are about 30 people
meeting each other face to face for the first time even though some
are quite familiar having conversed many times via CB.
"So you're 'Teleshrink' (my handle)..... You don't look
Page 2
anything like I pictured you." Around the room are several computers
linked to Compuserves's CB, of course.
People tend to form small groups around each of the computers
alternating between talking with each other and conversing with
others not there via the CB - saying hello , inviting people to join
us, giving them directions, etc. As I watch I notice something
rather odd.
One of the conversations on the CB is between two individuals
that are PRESENT IN THE ROOM. Rather than talk face to face ( they
could not be more than ten feet apart) they are communicating with
each other via the electronic telecommunications media.
How artificial, how sad, how alienated... these people can only
or prefer to communicate with each other in the restricted stilted
manner of telecommunication. Here it is, right before my eyes, an
example of how computers isolate and dehumanize us!
Then I step back for a moment, look carefully at the
individuals and begin to realize that things are not what they seem.
From her appearance, her demeanor, and the way she is dressed it is
clear that she is an upper middle class suburbanite who later tells
me in her Kennedyian accent that she is from Boston while he is a
somewhat overweight taxicab driver from Brooklyn New York, accent
and all.
Of course it is awkward for them to talk face to face; their
backgrounds and socio-economic status are so different. Yet they
frequently and enjoyably communicate with each other on the CB
Simulator.
What's going on ? Telecommunications is inherently democratic.
We are judged by what we type ( the quality of our ideas ) and not
the external signs of our wealth or social status.
It has some of the characteristics of being in direct contact
with someones' mind unencumbered by the accoutrements of social
class and status that we so often hide behind. In much the same way
as we can by writing personal letters or talking with a stranger
whom we are sure we will never see again we can be open and intimate
in expressing our innermost feelings.
The social barriers are lowered yet at the same time we remain
a 'safe distance apart'. Rather than dehumanizing them the
telecommunications is enriching their lives with new social
experiences.
They get to meet, to share, and to know a variety of
interesting people that they otherwise would have been unlikely to
have had the opportunity to interact with. No wonder they enjoy
telecommunications so much and even in some cases prefer it to face
to face conversations. So do I, even for some of the most
psychologically intimate forms of interaction - psychotherapy.
Below is a raw unedited excerpt from the transcript of the
third Telepsyching session ( psychotherapy via online realtime
telecommunications) of a 35 year old male who I had been seeing on a
face to face office visit basis.
Page 3
We seemed to have been getting nowhere fast so I suggested we
switch. He agreed and as they say "the rest is history". The
transcript speaks for itself. The intimacy and power of the media
are obvious.
Would that all psychotherapy were as productive as this fairly
typical Telepsyching session. Like Freud's couch this new way of
doing therapy - this shall we say electronic couch - eliminates the
distractions associated with face to face communications and let's
us go directly for the therapeutic gold. And you don't even need a
notebook, both therapist and patient can easily get a complete
transcript.
Have we stumbled onto the royal road to psychotherapy ?
Possibly. I do know beyond a doubt that for some people in some
situations Telepsyching is the preferred mode and is extraordinarily
effective. What a powerful teaching and learning tool it is for
those wishing to learn the otherwise ephemeral art of psychotherapy.
What more needs to be said except I would very much appreciate
your comments and criticisms.
EXCERPT FROM THE THIRD TELEPSYCHING SESSION WITH 35 YEAR OLD MALE
THERAPIST:
Can you describe one or two of the incidents were you really
wanted to be angry with one or both of your parents and didn't
dare to?
PATIENT:
the tomato juice incident when my Father wanted my to drink
tomato juice, and I was refusing to because the stuff made me
sick.. I would spank me ever so often when I wouldn't drink
it. After a few round my mother intervened, but I was just
resigned to the situation and not being able to do anything.
THERAPIST:
Do you realize in the above you said" I would spank me...".
Maybe its nothing but could it be that you are identifying with
your father and now doing the psychological spanking?PATIENT: I
hadn't realized that I typed that until you pointed it out, but
yes there have been quite a few things to support the idea. I
do mentally beat myself a lot.
THERAPIST:
Hm... in this incident(s) there also seems to be a blending of
thought, feelings, and actions.... Your father was forcing you
to do something that was detestfull to you and you were
fighting back by resisting... even when he spanked you ... As
an adult can you see how horrible that situation is?
PATIENT:
I don't know if I would use the word horrible to describe it.
In fact I think that I have a feeling of triumph associated
with it. After all, I won by not drinking the tomato juice.
That last observation is new, I've always considered the
incident as an example of one of my bad experiences.
Page 4
THERAPIST:
Interesting.... in your eyes you won!!! Nevertheless, doesn't
the idea of forcing a child, or trying to, to do something as
inconsequential as drinking tomato juice against his will...
doesn't that strike you as unfair, wrong?
PATIENT:
It's certainly something that I would hope I would never catch
myself doing to my own kid. I don't think it was a nice
thing to do.
THERAPIST:
Okay so as both an adult and a child you at some level
realized that your father was wrong and you resisted... when
you did he would spank you... You were punished for asserting
your rights , your individuality. In addition you were being
taught what has been called a kind of "LEARNED HELPLESSNESS".
PATIENT:
That sounds right, although I don't think I ever consciously
came to view it that way. In fact it cost me some effort to
type that last sentence about it not being a nice thing to do.
I'm just realizing that I still view my Father as infallibly
right.
THERAPIST:
Good... things are starting to come together..... Bear with me
for a moment more... you resolved this conflict/issue with
your father by becoming "resigned" to it. Is that just
another way of saying that as a child thru these and similar
incidents you learned to fear/dislike/avoid being assertive
and getting angry when somebody violated your personal
space... at least getting angry was wrong because you got
punished for doing so?
PATIENT:
I think that was close . I also remember a strong feeling of
helplessness.
THERAPIST:
Fascinating!!!! that fits very well... the "LEARNED
HELPLESSNESS". As a child you were in fact much more helpless
and dependent on your parents than you are now as an
independent adult.....
--------------------------------------------------------------------
If you have comments or other information relating to such topics as
this paper covers, please upload to KeelyNet or send to the Vangard
Sciences address as listed on the first page. Thank you for your
consideration, interest and support.
Jerry W. Decker.........Ron Barker...........Chuck Henderson
Vangard Sciences/KeelyNet
--------------------------------------------------------------------
If we can be of service, you may contact
Jerry at (214) 324-8741 or Ron at (214) 484-3189
--------------------------------------------------------------------
FINIS
Page 5
Reference in New Issue Copy Permalink