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F I D O N E W S -- Vol.11 No.40 (03-Oct-1994)
+----------------------------+-----------------------------------------+
| A newsletter of the | ISSN 1198-4589 Published by: |
| FidoNet BBS community | "FidoNews" BBS |
| _ | +1-519-570-4176 |
| / \ | |
| /|oo \ | Small animal psychology and |
| (_| /_) | Spiritual guidance Department: |
| _`@/_ \ _ | Rev. Richard Visage 1:163/409 |
| | | \ \\ | |
| | (*) | \ )) | Editors: |
| |__U__| / \// | Donald Tees 1:221/192 |
| _//|| _\ / | Sylvia Maxwell 1:221/194 |
| (_/(_|(____/ | Tim |
| (jm) | Newspapers should have no friends. |
| | -- JOSEPH PULITZER |
+----------------------------+-----------------------------------------+
| Submission address: editors 1:1/23 |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
| MORE addresses: |
| |
| Don -- don@exlibris.tdkcs.waterloo.on.ca |
| Sylvia -- max@exlibris.tdkcs.waterloo.on.ca |
| Tim Pozar -- pozar@kumr.lns.com |
| David Deitch -- 1:133/411.411, deitch@gisatl.fidonet.org |
|
| submissions=> editor@exlibris.tdkcs.waterloo.on.ca |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
| For information, copyrights, article submissions, |
| obtaining copies of fidonews or the internet gateway faq |
| please refer to the end of this file. |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
========================================================================
Table of Contents
========================================================================
1. Editorial..................................................... 2
2. Articles...................................................... 2
Election Nominations - Zone One Echomail Coordinator........ 2
Dear Reverend Visage,....................................... 3
Subject: Graduate Research Paper on Fidonet................. 4
Subject: Regarding your message in Fidonews!................ 5
The Rain Ditty.............................................. 7
Subject: Archival editions of FidoNews ..................... 7
Deere Madman Emilia......................................... 8
3. Fidonews Information.......................................... 11
FidoNews 11-40 Page: 2 03 Oct 1994
========================================================================
Editorial
========================================================================
Again Sunday night, again late, and again company downstairs.
A good snooze this week, starting with an update on the ZEC
election. More NC vs NC battles in Hong Kong (why not *three*
positions in the net [RC, NC, & PC {Political Co-ordinator}]),
then we could have a rule that the PC *has* to play politics,
The NSC *cannot* play politics, and the RC's cannot to anything
but tally the membership lists ...
mmm, sounds like the world ....
========================================================================
Articles
========================================================================
Election Nominations - Zone One Echomail Coordinator
by Adrian Walker
1:153/752
Interim Z1EC
ELECTION NOMINATIONS
Published Nomination Schedule 1994:
===================================
Nominations were open from 19 September 00:01 PDT (07:01 UTC).
to 25 September 23:59 PDT (06:59 UTC).
Published Nomination Rules:
===========================
Any Zone 1 SysOp listed in the 16 September 1994 Nodelist
(NODELIST.259) was eligible to be nominated.
Nominations were to be sent by netmail to Adrian Walker at 1:153/752.
A nomination was only valid after a message from the nominee accepting
the nomination was included or posted.
Nominees:
=========
The following Nominations for Zone 1 Echomail Coordinator were
received, and the nominees have accepted the nomination. They are
listed in alphabetical order:
===================================================================
Name Node Reg/State Nominated by Node
===================================================================
Martin Belcke 232/16 11 IL Rick Ashworth 108/90
Bruce Bodger 170/400 19 OK Bill Schnell 170/200
David Calafrancesco 2624/306 13 NY Derek Balling 236/48
FidoNews 11-40 Page: 3 03 Oct 1994
Steve Cross 123/19 18 TN Floyd Drennon 375/14
Ed Propes 2215/470 11 OH Murry Francis 2215/100
===================================================================
One additional sysop was nominated, but did not accept the nomination.
Remaining Election Schedule:
============================
Discussion now follows from 26 September 00:01 PDT (07:01 UTC).
to 7 October 23:59 PDT (06:59 UTC).
REC Voting period will be from 10 October 00:01 PDT (07:01 UTC).
to 14 October 23:59 PDT (06:59 UTC).
Results announced by 17 October 23:59 PDT (06:59 UTC).
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Swamp Swine Magazine,
Shuckmagosh, Ohio
Dear Reverend Visage,
I am sorry to hear that you have been detained by passport
control at the Quebec border. I suggest that you explain
that you are merely returning to Ottawa to courier another
$34 million dollars worth of federal swag to our culturally
paranoid brethren in the burgeoning republic of poutine.
After much research I have discovered the reason why our
ZC, Bob Satti (cue the plague of locusts), has remained
singularly uncommunicative during his term. It seems that
he has been locked in a conclave of cardinals with the other
ZCs where they have been sacrificing goats and divining the
entrails in an effort to choose a new IC. Their
deliberations were made more complicated due to the fact
that they had to find an appropriately weaselly exception to
their beloved Bible: PeeFour; before they could boot George
Peace upstairs into the position. Our prayers and our
edible underwear should go out to them for having attained
Divine revelations. In region 12 we are reminded that the
ghost of Bob MacKay will hover over George Peace as a result
of Peace's Thomas a Becket, "Would that he were gone"
efforts which occurred when our region was slowly emerging
from the malign ministration of Fidodespots.
I advise caution, Visage, in using your various hard-earned
Fido titles appended to messages. It seems that the contused
minds in Net250 have determined that messages calling for
the RC, Rick "Cocoon" Johnston's nether bits on a platter,
when signed using a Fidotitle, are grounds for a policy
complaint. Of course, in the socially arrested environment
of Net250, *everything* is grounds for policy complaints and
it has become such a happy hunting ground for the litigious.
FidoNews 11-40 Page: ? 03 Oct 1994
They have perfected a means of file attaching lawyers to
each other in their efforts to "prove" points. The most
recent dwarf-like concern arises over their net's purchase
of a satellite dish. As an aside, Visage, I fear they may be
less than amused when they discover that we have sold them
the left cup of Mitsou's bustier but with the planetoid
beings' abysmal technical standards, it'll take them months
to notice.
The only good news arising this week is the meltdown of the
NHL player/owner trough-wars. I am outraged, as would any
average citizen, that a rookie player should be compelled to
accept a paltry $270,000 for chasing a small black rubber
object over frozen surfaces, and that journeymen players
should be asked to put a freeze on the mere $47,340 per game
that they have been offered. The news of the lock-out is
excellent because, in a moment of weakness, I had purchased
season's tickets to the games of the women's broomball team
which the Ottawa elflords had erroneously identified as the
NHL hockey team: The Senators. Watching their playing style
has been about as exciting as watching squid mate. (Note, I
said "watching", and I realize that your participatory
endeavours in such activities may have added more interest.)
I must go, Visage, your secretary has an evil snarl on her
face and is threatening to phone Bill Clinton to tell him
that our office is the next easily conquered Third World
country. Her distemper has nothing at all to do with the
fact that I have spent her entire pension on Glenlivet
quality control testing. As a good and decent gesture,
Visage, I suggest that we offer her an all-expense paid
vacation on a Swedish ferry.
Regards,
Doc Logger,
Trout-on-Trent,
FlinFlon, Manitoba
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: Bob Nightingale (1:230/71)
Subject: Graduate Research Paper on Fidonet
I'm in the process of writing a term paper for my Networks and
Telecommunications class at Illinois Institute of Techology's Stuart
School of Business. The professor is an expert in the federal
governments FTS-2000 network standards and contributed to a large
part of the ISDN standards for high speed data communications. He is
still called upon for expert testimony in Washington every now and
then. Even after all this he had not heard of the Fidonet.
My paper will discuss the history and current status of the Fidonet.
I've had my system, Ham'nd Eggs, a node on here since March.
FidoNews 11-40 Page: 5 03 Oct 1994
Fidonet, I feel, is one of the unsung heroes of the Information
Superhighway story.
In order to base my paper on facts (and official hearsay), I would
like as many back issues of the Fidonews as possible. Also if there
are standards, documents, personal stories, etc. that would help me
tell the story of Fidonet, I would love to have access to them. Just
point me in the right direction!
Thanks a bunch.
--Bob.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: Louie Chan (6:700/101)
To: Editor (1:1/23)
Subject: Regarding your message in Fidonews!
* Forwarded from Louie Chan, 700/101
* Originally to Nils Hammar
* Originally dated 30 Sep 94 19:39:19
* Forwarded from "Netmail"
* Originally from Roger Nie
* Originally dated 30 Sep 94 06:17:46
-=> Note:
Forwarded (from: netmail) by Roger Nie using timEd.
Originally from Roger Nie (6:700/200.0) to Nils Hammar.
Original dated: Sep 30 '94, 06:17
Hello Nils!
> Nice to meet you! Let me introduce something about me first, my
>name is Roger Nie, Hub 200 Coordinator of Net700, and the current
>NEC of Net700, (until 30-September 94).
Regarding the "Re-engineering of Net 700", I can say that it seems
like the RC have appointed a NC that isn't supported by the nodes in
the net in question. This isn't a good situation, and from what I can
tell, the RC is a servant, not a master when assigning a new NC. If
the RC is assigning a NC that isn't accepted by the majority in the
network, then the RC has failed and should either resign as RC or
make a new assignment in cooperation with the nodes in the net in
question.
> Regarding your message in Fidonews Day 29, finally we can wait
> one of Internaional FidoNet SysOp to be careful what matter's
> in Zone 6 Net700. Now I will tell you the story about what
> happening now in Net700 and will quote you some of message who
> draft from our previous NC. (May be this is only a point of
> view on one side, but I just want someone to know that we now
> are staying in a non-democracy network in Zone 6 which
> controlled by our current RC (Samson Luk), ZC (Houlin Lui) and
> NC (Chris Leung)
> Also I can tell you all of the Hub in Net700 are already
> removed in International Nodelist without any warning, only
FidoNews 11-40 Page: 6 03 Oct 1994
> have the reason, we are not to obey him. Is this a dictator
> such as the government in China who get rid of dissentients in
> Tien On Mun.
> Now we have no way to complain, and we really hope someone
> can stand erect to help us which we only want to hold a
> election to vote who are we accept. Even we have try complain to
> Zone 1 head quarter but it seem no response.
>Quoting :
>==========
Area: Net700 Sysop Echo
Date : Sep 29 '94, 04:41
From : Louie Chan 6:700/101.3
To : All
Subj : The real story between Samson and me which is
proved by most SysOps !!
@MSGID: 6:700/101.3@FidoNet.org 88033f34
@PID: FM 2.2c.mL OX000151
* Originally by Louie Chan, 6:700/101.3@FidoNet.org
* Originally to Kenneth Lau
* Originally dated 29 Sep 1994, 4:39
Simpify the story as the following: Samson fired me because I
couldn't handle the node application forms very fastly (he said). But
in fact, he fired me due to his jealous to me. And he wants to
control Fido under his hand. And the old Zone Coordinator and I had
removed his RC and NC positions before 7 years. Therefore, he was
angry with me because I had fired him before 7 years. Before one
year, my father was dead and soon my girl friend had left me. And I
had moved my house and some hardware problem happened in my system.
During those periods, I had no spare time to reply some application
forms very fastly. Therefore, Samson had got two complaint letters
from two new SysOps. Then, Mr. Samson Luk used this reason to fire me.
In fact, I and my co-sysops are serving Net 700 smoothly. He fired me
without any warning. Why no warning although I had talked with him by
VOICE before he fired me ??
TOO BAD !!?
Thanks for your attention !
Best Rgds. Louie
FidoNews 11-40 Page: 7 03 Oct 1994
The Rain Ditty
by Murry Francis 1:2215/5
Rain, my thoughts...
Note: This is just a very short story about rain, if it is off topic
for the Snooze, please feel free to do your duty;-)
It was raining, raining very hard and steady and I loved the rain.
Somehow when it was raining I felt so close to nature in a way,
and that feeling was so nice, that of feeling at home with my
surroundings. I could see the drops raging down from the sky,
beating on the grass, roof, and anything else in it's path. The
trees, and all plants gave off this aura to me that they were
being fed the lifes essance that was needed so badly by them.
Many people do not care for the rain as I do, whenever it rains
they seem to bitch about it, and shiver. I just figure those
people are not "Rain" people as I am. They wish for sunny hot days
so they can do what "Sun" people enjoy, you see those people do
not welcome changes in weather, alot of them want it to be 85 to
90 degrees and sunny every day. I enjoy sunny days also, but
welcome the changes that nature sends me, they on the other hand
do not, and whine about rain, hhrrrmmmppphhhh!!
When I was a child my siblings and I would go outside in the rain
and play in it. In the middle of summer, rain was a welcome sight
and a relief from the scorching heat of the day. We would go to
puddles, and the side of the street where the rain would gather to
make the long trek down to the storm sewer, we would lay in the
rain water, and splash, jumping and stomping, we had a blast in
the rain. I guess that was my beginngs in my special relationship
with rain, and it has grown with me through this life. To this day
whenever it rains I want to go out in it, and walk, yes strange as
it may sound, I truly enjoy the rain.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Area Netmail, Msg#439, Sep-22-94 06:50:00
From: Mariusz Handke (2:481/1.48)
To: FidoNews (1:1/23)
Subject: Archival editions of FidoNews ...
Hello FidoNews !
Please ask me where in Europe could I get some archival
editions of FidoNews ? I'm looking for :
1. completly vol. 1-8
2. no. 1-39,42-46 of vol. 9
3. no. 7,12-14,23,24,28,30,32,33,35-48,50 of vol. 10 (A)
4. no. 1-5 of vol. 11 (B)
and I couldn't find them here in Poland. Please help me.
FidoNews 11-40 Page: 8 03 Oct 1994
Peace and Love,
Mariusz
*EDITOR'S NOTE:*
We would also like to hear from archival sites. we have
the last four or five years only, and would like to get copies
of all issues available for freq.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: Michael Nellis (1:240/1.27)
Hi, Editors.
The following is something I zipped off during my night course on
Intro to MacIntosh Word, at least the letter is. When I showed it
to the teacher it really cracked him up, so I thought I'd share it
with folks. As long as MADam Emilia is doing her Ann Landers
Wanna-be scthick, I figured I might as well do it as a letter to her,
and submit it in the following format.
Begin submission:
From: Fang-face @myplace
Deere Madman Emilia....
Im taking nite courses in MacIntosh Word and i have just
completed one of the exersices. It is a good peace of writing cause
i used the spell checquer to spell checque it.. But i do have a
question cause of the way it turned it out. It is not exzactly the
same way as in the excerise book. Hear is what i writ.
Dear, Dufous.
This year is the 50th anniversary of the introduction of tofu and
other mind altering substances at this university. To celebrate this
special demi-centennial, a number of student groups, most noticeably
the Panzer-jagends Feurher, have joined to plan Tofu Festa 50, a week
long celebration forced on us by Big Brother and the imperialistic
geeks of totalitarianism who are too spineless to stand up, never
mind stand up to the fascist antidisestablishmentarianist regime of
kindergarten drop outs.
To quote Laura Palmer (and boy am I glad they killed her in Twin
Peaks), who was head of the Student Soy Council and Hog Calling Club,
as well as last year's Tofu Queen (a position awarded to her for
turning in her kid sister):
The spirits of distilled tofu products has touched all of us on
this campus. Never before has a mind altering substance created
such feelings of camraderie and hang over. We truly are what we
eat, a concept difficult to reconcile with a liquid diet. As a
result, the theme of this year's special festivities shall be
FidoNews 11-40 Page: 9 03 Oct 1994
"Tofu Is Us."
Fifty years of fascist preparation and suppression, as well as several
executions, have gone into planning the "Tofu Is Us" campaign. We now
demand your support, on behalf of the Ministry of Truth, as a sponsor
of this event to provide whatever money, supplies, or manpower we
require, whether you can afford it or not, to make Tofu Festa 50 the
hallucination propagating fantasy-come-true sucess the tyrants want so
they can continue to brain wash us.
Thank you for your generous contributions and for not giving Big
Brother any reason to suspect your loyalty.
Sincerely,
A mutant cannabilistic fang-face bug-eyed
tentacular slime-thing creep from
the far wash of the galaxy
My question is am i computer illiterate or is my memory too
random access?
End submission.
Thank you for considering this submission.
Michael Nellis @1:240/1.27
From: Madam Emilia (1:221/192)
To: Fang Face (1:240/1.27)
Subject: twin piques
Q: My question is am i computer illiterate or is my memory too random
access?
A: Dear fang-face, you have entered the realm of non-linear thinking,
which is evidenced by your cravings for delusion and amusement seeking
demeanor. No, you are not computer literate, you are computer literati.
I would suggest immediate immersion in fifth generation languages before
completion of your Introduction to MacIntosh word course.
i thank you with enthusiasm for your contribution to the snooze. i've
become rather schizoidal having to consistently tlak to misself in the
emilia column, and find you are offering a refreshing escape from the
drone of voices in my own mind. wanna play?
Q: Dear Fang-face: Laura Palmer has re-entrantly situated herself inside
my memory. I've tried various virus checking progroms to erradicate her
existence, however she has managed to interrupt control of my keyboard on
numerous occasions, leaving me with a ghost in my machine. What should i
do??
From: Fang Face (1:240/1.27)
To: Madam Emilia (1:221/192)
Subject: twin piques
FidoNews 11-40 Page: 10 03 Oct 1994
Hi, Madam Emilia.
A: Dear fang-face, you have entered the realm of non-linear thinking,
which is evidenced by your cravings for delusion and amusement seeking
demeanor. No, yo are not computer literate, you are computer literati.
I would suggest immediat immersion in fifth generation languages before
completion of your Introduction to MacIntosh word course.
OK. but that might be hard to due cause I'm only a third generation
person. i also prefer to immerse myself in the hot tub or playboy
magazines.
=============
> wanna play?
Always. :-)
=============
Q: Dear Fang-face: Laura Palmer has re-entrantly situated herself
inside my memory. I've tried various virus checking progroms to
erradicate her existence however she has managed to interrupt control
of my keyboard on numerous occasions, leaving me with a ghost in my
machine. What should i do??
Deere Emilia.
This sounds very sirius. if Laura Palmer really is back then i think
we will have to treat her the way Scrooge recommends.
"If I had my way then every fool who goes about with a merry christmas
on his lips would be boiled in his own pudding and buried with a steak
of holly through his heart."
I understand that is standard treatment for people who won't stay dead.
You better board up that rear entrance too or there is no telling what
else might wonder in.
O yeah. I understand that an old remedy for viruses is to eat a clove
of garlic. this should also work against laura cause when the bug
bites you she'll drop dead from poisoning.
doant forget to clean the keybored. if you doant clean it often enuff
then a family of gerbils will move in to nest in teh dustballs and live
off the crums that drop from your snacks. Then you will have to call
the spca to find them a home....
Fang-face
Michael
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
* Ammendment to popular animals in Fidonet Statistics: *
* *
* Mooses - 10 *
FidoNews 11-40 Page: 11 03 Oct 1994
* bats - 16 *
* wombats - 5 *
* albatros - 3 *
* *
* thanks to Kurt Kurosawa of 1:271/313 *
* and Scott Brown of 1:221/1401 *
* for zoological investigative efforts. *
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
------- FIDONEWS MASTHEAD AND CONTACT INFORMATION ----------------
Editors: Sylvia Maxwell, Donald Tees
Editors Emeritii: Thom Henderson, Dale Lovell,
Vince Perriello, Tim Pozar
Tom Jennings
"FidoNews" BBS
FidoNet 1:1/23
BBS +1-519-570-4176, 300/1200/2400/14400/V.32bis/HST(DS)
more addresses:
Rev. Richard Visage -- 1:163/409
Don -- 1:221/192, don@exlibris.tdkcs.waterloo.on.ca
sylvia -- 1:221/194, max@exlibris.tdkcs.waterloo.on.ca
Tim -- pozar@kumr.lns.com
(Postal Service mailing address)
FidoNews
128 Church St.
Kitchener, Ontario
Canada
N2H 2S4
max & Don voice: (519) 570-3137
Fidonews is published weekly by and for the members of the FIDONET
INTERNATIONAL AMATEUR ELECTRONIC MAIL system. It is a compilation
of individual articles contributed by their authors or their
authorized agents. The contribution of articles to this compilation
does not diminish the rights of the authors. Opinions expressed in
these articles are those of the authors and not necessarily those of
FidoNews.
Authors retain copyright on individual works; otherwise FidoNews is
Copyright 1994 Sylvia Maxwell. All rights reserved. Duplication
and/or distribution permitted for noncommercial purposes only. For use
in other circumstances, please contact the original authors, or the eds.
OBTAINING COPIES: The most recent issue of FidoNews in electronic
FidoNews 11-40 Page: 12 03 Oct 1994
form may be obtained from the FidoNews BBS via manual download or
Wazoo FileRequest, or from various sites in the FidoNet and Internet.
PRINTED COPIES may be obtained by sending SASE to the above paper-mail
address, or trade for copy of your 'zine.
INTERNET USERS: FidoNews is available via FTP from ftp.fidonet.org,
in directory ~ftp/pub/fidonet/fidonews.
Anyone interested in getting a copy of the INTERNET GATEWAY FAQ may
freq GISFAQ.ZIP from 1:133/411.0, or send an internet message to
fidofaq@gisatl.fidonet.org. No message or text or subject is
necessary. The address is a keyword that will trigger the automated
response. People wishing to send inquiries directly to David Deitch
should now mail to fidonet@gisatl.fidonet.org rather than the
previously listed address.
SUBMISSIONS: You are encouraged to submit articles for publication in
FidoNews. Article submission requirements are contained in the file
ARTSPEC.DOC, available from the FidoNews BBS, or Wazoo filerequestable
from 1:1/23 as file "ARTSPEC.DOC". Please read it.
"Fido", "FidoNet" and the dog-with-diskette are U.S. registered
trademarks of Tom Jennings, and are used with permission.
"the pulse of the cursor is the heartbeat of fidonet"...
-- END

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