224 lines
7.8 KiB
Plaintext
224 lines
7.8 KiB
Plaintext
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<+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+>
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<+> <+>
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<+> The Self-Righteous Boys Present <+>
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<+> <+>
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<+> THE JOYS OF A VENDETTA! <+>
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<+> <+>
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<+> By The Scientist & The Samuri <+>
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<+> <+>
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<+> Written on January 23, 1986 <+>
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<+> <+>
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<+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+><+>
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Dictionary definition:
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VENDETTA:A prolonged feud marked by
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bitter hostility.
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Our definition:
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VENDETTA:A fun way to terrorize your
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enemies and make their life a living hell.
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Introduction:
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Who do you hate? Really hate! Hate so
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strongly you would like to ruin their
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life. Make them suffer. A good vendetta
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can give you a warm, wonderful feeling
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as you watch your sworn enemy suffer
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endless torments at your hands!
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Choosing a Victim:
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You have to be very serious about a
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real Vendetta. This isn't just a few
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pranks. Your hate has to be strong
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enough to maintain numerous attacks of
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incredible cruelty, without fear of
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punishment and no doubts about
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destroying the victims personal
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property or health. If you aren't
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serious, this phile is useless to you.
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The best victims are geeks who have no
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friends. The friendless are the
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helpless. There is no mercy in a
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vendetta, and no sportsmanship. The
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best kind are computer geeks who think
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they know it all but are really just
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know-nothing assholes. They are very
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easy to hate.
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Scout your Victim:
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Having several people in on the
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vendetta always helps, especially if
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some of them are unknown to the target.
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Be sure to find friends who are mean
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enough to hate this person just as much
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as you do.
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Follow the target around. Get to know
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what classes he takes at school and
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when. Find out where his locker is, how
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he gets home, where his house is, get
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his phone number. Find any regular
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patterns in his movements (usually
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something stupid like Cello lessons
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every Tuesday) You must learn to know
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your enemy, your hate ever growing. The
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more you know about someone, the easier
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it is to crush them from a distance.
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Harassment:
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Your hate will make you very creative
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in devising new torments. To get
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started, here is a collection of ideas
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both old and new:
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Target-Victims house:
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Go at night. Go on the night they put
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out the garbage and spread the garbage
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all thru the yard. Dump lots of garbage
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from other houses into the yard. Pour
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bright orange paint over the bushes,
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lawn, house, and car. Break the car or
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house window or cut a hole with a glass
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cutter. Find the hose and put it
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through the hole. Turn on the hose.
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Leave it there. Go at the house with
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hammers. Look for external phone boxes,
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gas meters, or any wires entering the
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house. Trash it all. Slash the screens
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to their screened-in porch. Steal the
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doormat. Throw the garbage cans filled
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with garbage through a window. Get some
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philes on bombs and use those. Here is
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a less subtle trick: Fill a plastic
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gallon milk container with gasoline or
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some flamable substance. Put it under
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the car or on the porch. Rig up a fuse
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or just surround it with oily rags.
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Throw a match into the rags and run.
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For maximun effect, pour gas on the car
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or on the house around the main
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container. No attack is too large or
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small.
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Target-Victim is at school:
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Steal his possessions. This is usually
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pretty easy. Steal his homework. If you
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have a class with him and a teacher
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makes you all pass homework or
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something to one place, intercept it
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and deftly pull his out. Steal his
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textbooks. They usually run at about
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$20 and he will have to pay. Go to his
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locker. If it is the kind with vent
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slits, squirt water or ink or gas in.
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Slip matches in. Look over his shoulder
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and get the locker combination. If you
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have biology and cut stuff up, take a
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fish or frog or fetal pig or whatever
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and rip it up. Smear it all over his
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locker and his books. Mangle it. Leave
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a note saying "you are next!". An easy
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one is just to take all the stuff out
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of his locker. Planting stuff in there
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is usually to complicated to set up so
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that they get caught, unless you have
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regular locker inspections. Buy some
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rats at a local pet store. They are
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pretty cheap. Put them in his locker
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and throw in something for them to eat.
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Do this over the weekend. Steal a
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bottled specimen from biology. Pour the
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formaldahyde over his stuff and leave
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the repulsive creature in there. Also,
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you could just beat the shit out of
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him, but that is a little to obvious.
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Remote fun:
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Demon dial his house in the middle of
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the night. Order pizzas for him. Send
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him taxicabs. Send him magazine
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subsciptions. Order sex aids in his
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name. Call and get his water and gas
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and electricity shut off. Call your
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local anonymous police hotline and say
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you saw him commit a crime (nothing to
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serious or it will be an obvious
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frame). Call the post office and get
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his mail stopped. Fill out change of
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address forms and get his mail sent to
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another state. Call a pool cleaner and
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have him go out to the victims house.
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Call a garden service, a snow plowing service, house painters, chimney
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sweeps, TV repairman, plumber. Call the
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police and say that there is a robbery
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in progress. Call the fire department.
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Call paramedics. Do it all in the
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middle of the night. Order anything you
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can find which is C.O.D. for him. Get
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a credit card number and order a ton of
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expensive stuff you know he would like
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for him. Overuse the card. Keep
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ordering stuff until the card goes bad.
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He might make some new friends in the
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FBI. Mail him a dead animal or a letter
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bomb. Send him a dead weasel 4th class.
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Mail him garbage or dog shit or some of
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his possessions you stole (trash them
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first). Catch his dog or cat and kill
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it and mail it to him. Send him hate
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mail and threatening letters.
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Conclusion:
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This phile is nowhere near complete,
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but can get you started. Accumulate
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several philes on explosives and
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harassment for even more ideas. Just
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remember that the more cruel,
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disgusting, sick, and evil you get the
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more fun it will be because the asshole
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will suffer more. A true anarchist
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would firebomb his house or rape and
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kill the guy's mother and sister and
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castrate the victim and break his arms
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and legs and knock out all his teeth
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and shove a sharp stick in his eye and
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bash him on the head with a lead pipe.
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This is advised only for serious,
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experienced psychopaths.
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You have not know joy until you stick a
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knife in the back of your enemy and
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slowly twist it and watch him wither
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and die as you laugh.
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Kill the bastard!
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(
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X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
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Another file downloaded from: NIRVANAnet(tm)
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& the Temple of the Screaming Electron Jeff Hunter 510-935-5845
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The Salted Slug Strange 408-454-9368
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Burn This Flag Zardoz 408-363-9766
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realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 510-527-1662
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Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 415-583-4102
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Tomorrow's 0rder of Magnitude Finger_Man 415-961-9315
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My Dog Bit Jesus Suzanne D'Fault 510-658-8078
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New Dork Sublime Demented Pimiento 415-566-0126
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Specializing in conversations, obscure information, high explosives,
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arcane knowledge, political extremism, diverse sexuality,
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insane speculation, and wild rumours. ALL-TEXT BBS SYSTEMS.
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Full access for first-time callers. We don't want to know who you are,
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where you live, or what your phone number is. We are not Big Brother.
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"Raw Data for Raw Nerves"
|
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X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
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