336 lines
13 KiB
Groff
336 lines
13 KiB
Groff
|
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
|
||
|
$~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~bF$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
|
||
|
$~~~$~~~~~~~$~~~~~~~$$ $~~~$ $~~~~~~~$~~~~~~~$ $ $~~~$~~~$~~~$
|
||
|
$ $ $ $ $ $$ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $
|
||
|
$ $ $ $ $ $$ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ " x$ $ $ $
|
||
|
$ $ $ $ $"""$$ $ $ $ xxxx$ xxxx$ $ $ $ $ $
|
||
|
$ $ $$$$$ $ $$ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $
|
||
|
$ $ $$$$$ $ $$ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $
|
||
|
$xxx$xxx$$$$$xxxxxxx$$ppppppppppp$ppppppp$ppppppp$ppp$ppp$ppp$pppp $
|
||
|
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ $
|
||
|
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
|
||
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
||
|
IRC Weekly - "not just yermom on drugs" - IRC Weekly
|
||
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
||
|
Edition #1:
|
||
|
|
||
|
IRC Weekly? subzero
|
||
|
IRC - An Electronic Drug Zircon
|
||
|
Zircon's Interview With Benny(the ircoper) Zircon
|
||
|
Quote of the Week logged by subzero
|
||
|
iRC LaNGooAGE Mad Sniper
|
||
|
ode tew tha irc warriors Valgamon
|
||
|
When your good your good? Stumble
|
||
|
Version polls subzero
|
||
|
Windows95 IRC SCRIPT fiend/zircon
|
||
|
What we call the END subzero
|
||
|
|
||
|
----------------------------------------------------------------------
|
||
|
|
||
|
------- - --- - - - -
|
||
|
IRC Weekly?
|
||
|
---- - - -- -- -
|
||
|
|
||
|
If your happy and you know it clap your hands... anyways its
|
||
|
2:30am on a thursday/friday night/morning.. what did you expect
|
||
|
a emag idea on FROGS (no offence srfrog if you read this heh).
|
||
|
Ok by now you gotta be asking wtf is IRC weekly (doh illegal use
|
||
|
of words WTF!*@^@!)... well its simply a weekly write up of stuph
|
||
|
todo with EYE ARE SEA(you know the thing you are addicted to?).
|
||
|
Nuff said...
|
||
|
|
||
|
- subzero
|
||
|
|
||
|
ps. if you want to add anything to this funky new wave generation
|
||
|
type irc emag thingy then email subzero@marooned.tamu.edu
|
||
|
with your submissions, articles, logs or whatever...
|
||
|
|
||
|
|
||
|
------- - --- - - - -
|
||
|
IRC - An Electronic Drug
|
||
|
---- - - -- -- -
|
||
|
|
||
|
IRC - An Electronic Drug
|
||
|
Written By Zircon
|
||
|
|
||
|
You may wonder about the topic, but i'm sure many of you know
|
||
|
what i mean. How many times have you relized you're addicted, physically,
|
||
|
and mentally to IRC? I'm sure you have noticed yourself experiencing
|
||
|
withdrawl after being away for a week or so, still don't see it? Well
|
||
|
lets compare, cocaine, and IRC.
|
||
|
|
||
|
Cocaine: 1. One usage, and you're hooked.
|
||
|
2. Costs lots of money.
|
||
|
3. Seperates you from your family.
|
||
|
4. You develope a tolorance, and always need more.
|
||
|
5. Leads to a life of crime.
|
||
|
6. You probably started because it's "Cool"
|
||
|
|
||
|
IRC: 1. One hour, you're majorly hooked.
|
||
|
2. The higher the speed, the more it costs.
|
||
|
3. I doubt you IRC with your family in your room.
|
||
|
4. 1 hour is never enough, then 2, then 3.
|
||
|
5. You start carding, setting up confs, trading warez,
|
||
|
all illegal things to support your habbit.
|
||
|
6. Well ... you probably started for WaReZ, but i bet
|
||
|
you thought they were kewl.
|
||
|
|
||
|
There you have it, almost identical, IRC Is a drug. Want more? By
|
||
|
definition in the Oxford dictionary a drug is:
|
||
|
|
||
|
drug 1 n. medicinal substance; narcotic, hallicinogen, or
|
||
|
stimulant, esp. one causing addiction.
|
||
|
|
||
|
I know i've seen shit while on irc, and don't tell me you goto
|
||
|
bed with a clear mind, without a thought of IRC, after a heavy 8 hour,
|
||
|
addict session.
|
||
|
|
||
|
Well since it's 5am i'de like to keep this sort of short and to
|
||
|
the point, but one last thing, who sells the drugs? Who controlls the
|
||
|
flow, no, not the ISP, those, big know it all IRCOPS (*cough* benny
|
||
|
*cough*) walking around, pimping, sucking dick for more drugs, they want
|
||
|
the next level, the better high, ahh yes, the O: (refer to 'Zircons
|
||
|
interview with Benny') the best high IRC has to offer. We need to help
|
||
|
those people, they've gone to far, they can't handle the high anymore,
|
||
|
and start murdering (*cough* vanity kill *cough*) people for MORE high,
|
||
|
but they don't get more, they need help, or soon, they're gonna end up
|
||
|
like the dood in that TCL 'Waterfalls' video.
|
||
|
|
||
|
Zircon
|
||
|
(The Worlds Problems Are A Result Of Rap Music)
|
||
|
|
||
|
|
||
|
------- - --- - - - -
|
||
|
Zircon's Interview with Benny(the ircoper)
|
||
|
---- - - -- -- -
|
||
|
|
||
|
<Zircon755> > [benny] how much diq would i have to suck for an O: ?
|
||
|
<Zircon755> *benny!mike@dolphin.elec.Shasta.CC.CA.US* lots
|
||
|
<Zircon755> > [benny] how much did u have to suq?
|
||
|
<Zircon755> *benny!mike@dolphin.elec.Shasta.CC.CA.US* lots
|
||
|
<Zircon755> > [benny] how hard did u have to suq?
|
||
|
<Zircon755> *benny!mike@dolphin.elec.Shasta.CC.CA.US* very hard
|
||
|
<Zircon755> > [benny] did u have to give it up the ass?
|
||
|
<Zircon755> *benny!mike@dolphin.elec.Shasta.CC.CA.US* nah
|
||
|
<Zircon755> > [benny] did they make you swallow?
|
||
|
<Zircon755> *benny!mike@dolphin.elec.Shasta.CC.CA.US* nope
|
||
|
|
||
|
|
||
|
------- - --- - - - -
|
||
|
Quote of the Week logged by subzero
|
||
|
---- - - -- -- -
|
||
|
|
||
|
<benny> my finger dont work
|
||
|
|
||
|
wheeee more benny bashing
|
||
|
|
||
|
------- - --- - - - -
|
||
|
iRC LaNGooAGE: Wut to thinq wen sum1 sayz "0-day 31337 gnu warez"
|
||
|
---- - - -- -- -
|
||
|
|
||
|
-an ereet atrikle by mad sniper, explainink da reet stuph we've
|
||
|
developed over da yearz-
|
||
|
|
||
|
Wun day eye wuz on da internet relay chat and i wuz like "phuq these
|
||
|
people are kawllink me layme n shit wtf is layme!?" and it is now that I
|
||
|
realize w0t the language meanz. here's like... uhm... a translashun
|
||
|
tayble thing:
|
||
|
|
||
|
layme, l4m3, llama, laymuhr, lamah, lamer = joo needa touch up on your
|
||
|
kourieurink skillz.
|
||
|
k-raddy, k-rad, neato ereeto, elite, 31337, leet = joo kick sum majah azz
|
||
|
on da irc.
|
||
|
0-day = this is gewd.
|
||
|
gewd = this is vundahfewl
|
||
|
vundafewl = this is gewd or 0-day.
|
||
|
|
||
|
Okay, that's pretty mooch a basic translation table. With that, joo will
|
||
|
be jah coolezt ereeto d00d on irc in no tyme.
|
||
|
|
||
|
On to the next sekshun, where the author learns to spell things
|
||
|
correctly, gets a haircut, and stops masturbating.
|
||
|
|
||
|
Okay. You may find yourself on a channel with no people. There are two
|
||
|
possibilities for this to occur:
|
||
|
1) You have no life and like to hang out on channels alone.
|
||
|
2) You just netsplit.
|
||
|
In the former case, we can't help you, just get your ass off irc and call
|
||
|
1-800-388-PIR8 (irc help hotline) and ask them what you should do about
|
||
|
your pirate problem (pirate is a synonym for "irc"). However, in the
|
||
|
latter case, do this:
|
||
|
/quit
|
||
|
It's the only way to get out of your current situation without
|
||
|
accidentally taking over a channel (that would be bad, because then if
|
||
|
you did, you'd have ops, and everyone knows that all channel ops are evil).
|
||
|
|
||
|
Alrighty. You may hear sum dood named "Pele" or "Sheiky" (2 different
|
||
|
laymuhrz) say 'irc scripts are lame'. They're wrong, irc scripts are
|
||
|
really really eleet! Get one that joo pheel cumfterbull with n shit. Coz
|
||
|
like.. If pheenickz is dah onlee thing on yer account, joo gotz problemz.
|
||
|
And joo are a laymuhr. Jew needa get sumthink like "Lice", "Tech5",
|
||
|
"FausT", etc, to be considered "Ereet" and "0-dayz" by your irc comrades.
|
||
|
Fuck me stupid! I almost forgot the most important thing:
|
||
|
|
||
|
Women.
|
||
|
|
||
|
Women hang out on irc, believe me now and hear me later. Joo may not gno
|
||
|
it until like aphter you've called one of them a guy (like i did wunz
|
||
|
with lsi oops I was laym back then), but there are sum jix out there that
|
||
|
are just dying to have you say "Heya big woman, wanna irc with me for a
|
||
|
few hours?". They wub dat. Wunz I kawlled jewels on the telefown and I
|
||
|
wuz like "so you like kourieuring, eh?" and she wuz like "yeah." and we
|
||
|
really hit it off. It's like this wun time when I went to school in 3rd
|
||
|
grade and pulled down my pants and everyone saw my pecker and I became
|
||
|
really popular in skewl.
|
||
|
|
||
|
..But..
|
||
|
|
||
|
You can't get the 0-day women unless ya gots the 0-day script and yer
|
||
|
chatting on the 0-day channels. There's nothing like kawwlink an ugly hoe
|
||
|
you just met in #canada (a laym 5-90 day channel) and have her tell you
|
||
|
how much her wuzzle is aching for you. It's a waste of valuable time you
|
||
|
could be spending masturbating (which I don't do any more).
|
||
|
|
||
|
So like.. Remember these elite irc thingz, they may get you unbanned frum
|
||
|
a channel.
|
||
|
|
||
|
-> ms
|
||
|
|
||
|
|
||
|
------- - --- - - - -
|
||
|
ode tew tha irc warriors
|
||
|
---- - - -- -- -
|
||
|
|
||
|
For staying up till four in the morning...
|
||
|
For showering every three days...
|
||
|
For never leaving the house, unless it catches on fire, and then only
|
||
|
after we grab our computers...
|
||
|
For sleeping late into the afternoon...
|
||
|
For totally wasting the summer with meaningless conversation...
|
||
|
|
||
|
We are...
|
||
|
|
||
|
-/- THE IRC WARRIORS -/-
|
||
|
(Not to be confused with the Couch Commandos)
|
||
|
"Sworn to sit on our asses day after day and stare at the screen."
|
||
|
|
||
|
Here is the IRC WARRIORS' token fight song:
|
||
|
(it sounds vaguely like the Ren and Stimpy "Log" song)
|
||
|
|
||
|
We sit in a chair,
|
||
|
at the screen we stare,
|
||
|
as our boredom slowly mounts
|
||
|
|
||
|
We sit home all day,
|
||
|
and we'll never pay
|
||
|
for our hacked cris.com accounts
|
||
|
|
||
|
the warriors, the warriors, we're on IRC all day
|
||
|
the warriors, the warriors, at home is where we stay
|
||
|
|
||
|
- Valgamon
|
||
|
|
||
|
|
||
|
------- - --- - - - -
|
||
|
When your good your good?
|
||
|
---- - - -- -- -
|
||
|
|
||
|
Date: Wed, 21 Jun 95 01:41:06 MDT
|
||
|
From: Eric Hillis
|
||
|
To: root@escape.com
|
||
|
Subject: Don't know if you really care
|
||
|
|
||
|
a real lamer has apparently some ability to do nick collisions on IRC
|
||
|
at will.. and it is extremely annoying.. so do you care? maybe not.. I
|
||
|
thought
|
||
|
I would try and see if anyone did..
|
||
|
|
||
|
his supposed address was:
|
||
|
stumble@elite.escape.com
|
||
|
|
||
|
he said f*** my sysadmin
|
||
|
so hmmm does anyone care? maybe not
|
||
|
I'm really fed up with EFNet
|
||
|
we have tried for a year to keep a peaceful channel called #bible
|
||
|
not one of the IRC admins gives a crap.. and they gladly ban our
|
||
|
bots..
|
||
|
thanks a lot to all of them.. and now this lamer gets to run our
|
||
|
channel..
|
||
|
thanks
|
||
|
Eric (Edub on IRC)
|
||
|
(hillis@mirza.colorado.edu)
|
||
|
|
||
|
|
||
|
------- - --- - - - -
|
||
|
Version Polls
|
||
|
---- - - -- -- -
|
||
|
|
||
|
"out of 100 people surveyed..." - family fued
|
||
|
|
||
|
---------------------------------------------------------------
|
||
|
SCRIPT AUTHOR NUM/100 PERCENTAGE H.VER L.VER
|
||
|
---------------------------------------------------------------
|
||
|
FausT DrD 1 .01% GOLD -
|
||
|
TextBox CKeeper 4 .04% 6.21 -
|
||
|
PurePak CKeeper 8 .08% 1.08 1.00b
|
||
|
splitSUrfer unknown 2 .02% 1.10b -
|
||
|
LiCe SrFrog 33 .33% 1.3pl1 1.1pl5c
|
||
|
DsTRuKT subzero 3 .03% 1.02p -
|
||
|
PhoEniX Vassago 43 .43% 2.25 2.01
|
||
|
DJiNN Vassago 1 .01% 1.01 -
|
||
|
Tech5 Zakath 1 .01% 1.0w -
|
||
|
y0h0h0 Alphasux 4 .04% 'N' v'M'
|
||
|
---------------------------------------------------------------
|
||
|
* H.VER = Highest Version Seen ** L.VER = Lowest Version Seen *
|
||
|
|
||
|
|
||
|
------- - --- - - - -
|
||
|
Windows95 IRC SCRIPT
|
||
|
---- - - -- -- -
|
||
|
|
||
|
Now you too can use up more ram, disk space, bandwidth etc etc.
|
||
|
|
||
|
# **********CUT HERE***************
|
||
|
|
||
|
# IRC95 - Now you, like windows95, can use up more resources, ram,
|
||
|
# bandwidth, the whole nine yards
|
||
|
# Written by Fiend/Zircon
|
||
|
|
||
|
alias s {
|
||
|
if ([$0]) {
|
||
|
if ([$temp95]) {^assign temp95 ${temp95} $(0)95}{^assign temp95 $(0)95}
|
||
|
s $1-
|
||
|
}
|
||
|
{
|
||
|
//send $temp95
|
||
|
^assign -temp95
|
||
|
}
|
||
|
}
|
||
|
echo *** IRC95 Loaded - Use /s <message> and you can use more irc resources
|
||
|
|
||
|
# **********STOP HERE***************
|
||
|
|
||
|
|
||
|
------- - --- - - - -
|
||
|
What we like to call the END
|
||
|
---- - - -- -- -
|
||
|
|
||
|
Zircon's final note:
|
||
|
*** #twilight_zone Sorry, cannot join channel. (Banned from channel)
|
||
|
hmmf, somebody please unban me.
|
||
|
|
||
|
subzero's final note:
|
||
|
lalalalala
|
||
|
|
||
|
|
||
|
What more to say... cept you have reached what we call the end.
|
||
|
|
||
|
Founder of IRC Weekly: subzero
|
||
|
Chief Editor : zircon (but he cant spell?)
|
||
|
|
||
|
Thanx for this edition go out to:
|
||
|
- Mad Sniper, Valgamon, fiend, Stumble and the benny bashing crew
|
||
|
|
||
|
NOTE: if a version doesnt come out every week its due to technical
|
||
|
difficulties and because noone said HIGH to zircon.
|