401 lines
20 KiB
Plaintext
401 lines
20 KiB
Plaintext
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LIBERTY TREE PUB: Her Honour
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by D.M. Hanna
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When Mister Johnston's apples reached the size of her clenched
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fist, the misses informed me as to her intention to visit kin. Not
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in so many words, mind you; her dealings with me are more subtle than
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that. What she actually said was something altogether different.
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"Look here, Wil," she began, holding one of the fruits aloft, "have
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you ever seen such a pitiful sight? This time of year the fruits should
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be much better -- would you not agree? Why, my own mother's apples are
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most probably near ripe by now! And her blackberries! Oh, Wil if I could
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have some of both, I would have fine preserves for this winter -- GRAND
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pies I could serve you then!"
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The dear offered me these observations when my mouth was filled with
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her bread awash in barley broth, and a gentleman's reply could not be
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given. More to the point, it was not required. Having known this woman
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for nearing a score of years, I was to know that she was not expecting
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an answer to her words; she was dangling the carrot! Past dealings had
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been much the same choice: accept the carrot -- or suffer the stick!
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With haste, I stuffed my cheeks with more of her savory bread well
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buttered, wishing to purchase time in which to mull-over a proper
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response and the timing of said.
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One thing was to be certain: the misses wanted to travel to her
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native homestead, and I dared not disappoint her plan. Other men may
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not admit, but it is God's truth that the hen rules the coop, and the
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rooster is merely granted occasional privilege. Should he ever attempt
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to rule the roost, a sound pecking awaits his head and other, softer
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parts.
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Were my mother to have reared a dunce, I may have replied, "Sorry,
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dearest. What with my columns due and the book growing full, I have no
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time for frivolous travels. But don't dispair, my love. Perhaps, after
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I have made sufficient progress in my assignments and cached a number
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of writings ahead we can make the journey -- say, in a month, or so."
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Very well; I would suppose here an admission is due. As I did consider
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a response such as this, I begrudgingly admit that my mother may have
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borne such a foole -- but -- this particular buffoon had previously made
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a similar blunder, well remembering the lesson learned! And so, I made
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the decision of a learned man; a man of letters and wisdom . . . .
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My sly and considered response was a neutral "Mmmm," as I continued
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to cram more crusts and soup into my foolish mouth!
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My goodly wife is not a harpy, nor can she be called unreasonable,
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shrill, or unfair. My experience has been that, when I refrain from
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being pigheaded and male, Susan will always afford me opportunity to
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save face and a most workable solution, to boot. True to this, her
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better nature, she spoke, and her reprieve gladdened my ears.
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"William," she began in her sweetest, most pleasing voice, "Ellen
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Darby and I were speaking just the other day. Her man Jason is away on
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extended business, and she's wanting to find quilts worthy of her new
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bedroom set.
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"What?" I said to her -- completely aghast at the coincidence!
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"My mother and her bee produce award winning comforters! In fact,
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nearby my childhood home lives a thriving Amish community, where I am
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quite sure you can find what covers you desire for a fraction of your
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anticipated cost!"
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Having swallowed my mouthful (and hers also) I smiled my best and
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replied, "And what was her reply?"
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Absolutely beaming and aglow in response to my inferred approval,
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she lept into my lap and gleefully said, "She leaves on the morrow and
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I shall show her the way! Oh, Wil! I am so VERY glad for your consent!
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I shall indeed fetch back those fruits -- and MORE!"
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Soon after, the remainder of my broth and bread was rendered fodder
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for the dog, as Susan and I became otherwise engaged. Of that I shall
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say nothing more, save this: my page and quill idled a fair part longer
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than usual after that noontide, and this rooster was granted the
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privilege of being the cock-of-the-walk that day!
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Shortly after the next day's dawning, I watched and waved as the wife
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and her benefactor rode out of the burg. Making best of the circumstance,
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I forewent all meals that day and worked the pen feverishly, meaning to
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accomplish all that I could before the dinner hour. And when at last I
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heard the reverend Murphy's bells ringing at dusk, I bid my desk and
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house farewell.
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Once gaining the street, I withdrew the passkey from my pocket, smiled
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broadly, and hastened my steps in search of the doorlock at the Liberty
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Tree Pub and Grille.
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* * *
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Upon arrival at the Liberty Tree, I was treated to a homecoming all
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my own. Before reaching the bar, the lovely and vivacious Eva accosted
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me in a most welcoming manner.
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"WILLIE!" she cried, bounding out and up from Benjamin's lap and
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hastily crossing the room. "And where is it that you have been? A
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naughty boy you are!"
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Ready and willing of the confrontation, I swept her off her feet in
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approach, pressed her lusciously scented self to mine, and hungrily
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kissed her full and wanting mouth.
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"You are forgiven!" she giggled as I released her from my clutch.
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Stroking my chin, she cooed; "and thank your dear wife for me."
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"And what is it I will be thanking her for?" I queried.
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"For sating your animal fever, my dear sweet William -- and, for
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teaching you so well in greeting!" she emphasized, petting me low and
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grinning.
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Though I had thought myself prepared for her manner, I blushed in
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reply.
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"Go on with you," she said, her voice singing in my ears. "Old Ben has
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been waiting the discussion for you. Can I bring you a cup?"
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"Yes, please." I muttered, attempting to regain my composure; feeling
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quite ignored, my entrails grumbled their want.
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"For you I bring a specialty," she giggled, patting my belly, "and
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though your master has grieved you, Evie will fill you up. Off with you
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now -- the both of you -- SCAT!" She finished, nudging me to face Ben's
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table, while she waltzed away toward the counter.
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As I sat myself to the table, Ben winked me a welcome while drinking
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his ale. To his left sat John, and I was pleased to find him in a much
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more chipper mood then when last we met. "Halloo!" he greeted me with
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open hand.
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"Wil, meet Thomas." Ben pronounced with pride, indicating the red
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maned gent to his right. "Much as you, he is an author. I dare say, he
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would honour the profession if he were not also a barrister."
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"This old curmudgeon has told me of you, William," he stated, shaking
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my hand. "We two -- three -- have been long in acquaintance, and I am
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pleased to know you."
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"And I you," was all I could get out before Eva set a large, frothy
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mug before me and dropped in my lap, requiring her recompense. Without
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delay, I thanked her as I knew best.
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"See here?" she announced to the room after the bus. "You would
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all do well to learn from this one!" Leaning in close and clutching
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me, she spoke in a whisper. "Tell your master I will chamber you when
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she tires of this," and again, she was off across the room.
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A strange look of perplexity coloured Tom's face, and I could not
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know why.
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"I dare say," remarked Ben, waving his arm to the room, "that Wil
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may be the first of us to sample the proprietor's wares. A toast to you,
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young man!"
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While we three drank, Tom grinned like a devil and slapped me on the
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back, saying, "Astonished at you is what I am! For years I have tickled
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and taunted that one, and she has NEVER shown ME such attention!"
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Once again, I burned with the rue of embarrassment.
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About then, another seated himself in the chair to John's left and
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waited patiently to be introduced. After a moment -- when none did so
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-- I introduced myself.
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"Pleased to meet you, William," he said with a nod, "I am called
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Henry."
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"I do not recall your face from when last I visited," I ventured,
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looking intently at his face, "but you seem familiar to me."
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"Rarely do I come here," he replied with a wry smile, adding, "I
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never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude."
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Without my notice, Eva had returned to the table, carrying a piping
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hot platter filled with a mouthwatering and ample fillet of perch flanked
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on opposing sides by parsley potatoes and buttered beans, and, a pitcher.
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She refilled everyone's mugs and collected her tithes from all -- but
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Henry. Instead of smooching the saucy one, he looked away to the crackling
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fire and the hearth across the room.
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If there were any who found his reaction peculiar, none mentioned it.
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To me, it was as telling of him as his words.
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While I ate, the others busied themselves with trivial talk, good
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natured teasing, and other such banter. By the time I had consumed near
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all my portions, Eva returned and deposited another brimming pitcher.
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"My compliments to the cook," I breathed, retarding a belch, "for a most
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memorable meal -- and I thank you, Evie, for such fine service."
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Displaying a moist twinkle in her eye and a broad, inviting smile,
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Eva announced, "Did you pack of heathens hear? Chivalry and good manners
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are NOT lost in this one! You all would do well to mind his example!" And
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when collecting my table service she muttered, "A special dessert for you,
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dear. Be sure to see me before you return to your misses this eve." This
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having been said, Eva left our company without another word and requiring
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none of the attention most customarily shown her.
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"Quite the charmer, are you not, sir? Perhaps you will bewitch us all
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in your -- your _futuristic_ ways," John said sourly over his cup.
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"Mind your tongue!" Ben snided in a lowish tone, "as some matters are
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best left alone."
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"You folk did not hesitate one whit in questioning me regarding such
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matters! Is this one so different?" John grumbled, sinking into a dark
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mood and further into his ale. "You forbid me from poking about, but
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why? Because I am a latecomer? A query for you, then: just WHO was it
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that placed YOU in authority?"
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"Be still . . ." Tom replied with menacing pitch in his voice and
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looking daggers at this other. "Know your place."
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With these words the conversation grew cold as the grave. But here
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is a curious observation I made: these others became quite sullen, and
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withdrew into the depths of their cups -- but again, with the exception
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of Henry. He alone looked to me with a wistful, pleasing countenance.
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Truly I tell you, I could not discover the meaning of this while
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courting their silence. After some longish moments of their brooding and
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his bemuse, I broke the quiet.
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What is it that is often said? Curiosity killed the cat -- but that
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satisfaction brought it back?
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"Gentlemen," I began, taking pitcher in hand, servicing each of
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their cups, and lastly my own, "it is time this was put behind us. To
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date, there has existed an unspoken truce among all who venture here,
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and I am not at all sure that such an arrangement is healthy. So -- I
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will breech the subject and risk the fates. How is it that we, persons
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of such differing periods in time's tale, can congregate here and now in
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the shelter of this enchanted place?"
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Their simultaneous, group look of astonishment spoke volumes;
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unfortunate for me, the language of those tomes was altogether foreign
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of my own. John alone retorted, "See there, Ben? He expects it! I am
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right as rain in April and this one will be its proof!"
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Tom glared at John, who quickly regained his composure, yet, retained
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his glee.
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Ben regarded me with an inquisitor's eye, apparently both
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apprehensive and curious. Pausing first to quench his thirst he then
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puffed up and spoke. "Very well, William. Since you urge the moment, I
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will moderate." Speaking to the others he remarked, "Any who think ill
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of this arrangement, speak now."
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None challenged him; not even John.
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"So be it. William," he continued, looking thoughtful. "Though we
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have discussed this matter amongst ourselves before, we have little
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to offer in solid evidence."
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"Save, that Ben finds each of us in his wanderings," interjected
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John. "And, that each of us freely returns to his place and time of
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origin."
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For the first time in my recall, Ben looked cross, but more so.
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Without hesitation, he spent this message on John. "If you will not
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abide by the arrangement, begone!" he shouted, and emphasized his words
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with a loud, hard stomp of his shoe against the floor.
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The whole of the tavern took notice of his outburst, and I was
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embarrassed for him, and for John.
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I began to laugh, much to the astonishment of my companions. I
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confess this to have been a nervous reply, but not an inappropriate
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one. One by one, each of my tablemates joined me, but it was not until
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Ben himself laughed aloud that the congregation of the pub returned to
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its normalcy. When I regained my composure I had some explaining to do.
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"My apologies, Ben. But just then you reminded me of myself when chiding
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the misses for a silly accident!" After seeing his face reflect a humble
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thought duly noted, I continued. "I understand gentlemen, I really do.
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Plain to me is this: each of you is want of news, and John is the most
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encouraged to take advantage of this moment."
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Looking toward the cowering John, Ben growled, "He neglects all
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protocol and common sense! Suffering such ungentlemanly behavior is a
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trial to me -- and he knows full well the harm to be done in asking."
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"There is that," I mused. Knowledge without wisdom can cause
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unspeakable destruction, and our shared circumstance was potentially
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timestopping . . . quite literally so. It was plain that I could say
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nothing -- solid -- of that which was yet to be for them. "Never the
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less," I continued, "have you an answer to my quest? Are any of you
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privy to the workings of this enigmatic tavern? I know it is frowned
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upon to look a gift horse in the mouth, but how else does one determine
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the value in the offing?"
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After first looking to the others Ben shrugged his shoulders, saying,
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"It is hard for an empty sack to stand upright."
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"Meaning?" I replied with a sheepish grin.
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Rather than offer response, Ben retreated into the depth of his cup
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and the others remained silent. Tom, his face twisted with intellectual
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perplexity and John, looking like a child spooked by strange sounds in
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the night. But Henry's eyes and mouth bespoke a strange serenity -- and
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a knowing.
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Again I laughed, telling them this, "Gentlemen, none of you
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surprise me! Each of you replies much as I would expect. Ben, the
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resident scientist and philosopher finds no little peg on which to
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hang his hat with surety. And wordsmith Tom! Tom, the lawyer -- he
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courts quiet after finding no misplaced words on which to base any
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argument!" At this point I paused to drink and look impishly at the
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others because of my suspicions. When I decided the wait had been
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dramatic and sufficient enough, I continued, quoting: "O Time, bring
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back those midnights and those friends,/Those glittering moments that
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a spirit lends." When finished, I smiled wryly at our brother John.
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"My dear Lord." John uttered breathlessly, "How is it that you know
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my muse?"
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With the most baffling smile I could muster I turned to Henry,
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saying, "Did you not once say, `Time is but the stream I go a-fishing
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in'?"
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Much to my amusement, Henery exhibited first surprise, then, a look
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of anger as if having been robbed. Quickened by the thrill in my heart,
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I continued speaking, saying, "Gents! Just as surely as I know myself,
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I know the lot of you!"
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Noticing Eva in approach, I stood with mug in hand and loudly
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pronounced, "Gentlefolk! I will not pretend to know just how this
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meetinghouse exists, but I can toast her spirit -- to Eva! For all my
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tomorrows, may she be ready to sate my every hunger!"
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In reply, all those attending the hall stood and raised their cups
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amid calls and cries of, "Hear, hear!" and "To Eva!" Almost immediately,
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the dear lady was being passed around from one set of lips to another.
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And while this carousal went round, I crossed to the bar and stood apart
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from it.
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When the patrons once again settled into their places I glanced back
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to the table and caught sight of Ben's happy eye winking a secret reply.
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From a distance, I observed all the clientele resume their conversations
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and gayeties as if I myself were an unseen spectre in the pub. That is,
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until that little vixen Eva set upon me with her hungry mouth. And I
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would have you know -- she did not release me until she was well sated.
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This proved to be quite entertaining to all those who noticed; laughing
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and cat-calling their pleasure at the spectacle.
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"Thank you, sweet William," she whispered while the two of us
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embraced. United, we edged our way toward the vestibule and so, out
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of eyespot of all others. Once alone, I looked deep into her emerald
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green eyes, and was sorely tempted to be imprudent and speak my heart.
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"I thank you for such a luscious dessert," I muttered privately to her.
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"I will say nothing to them of my knowing; your secrets are saved in me."
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Surprising enough to me, she blushed a little. "Whatever are you
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speaking about?" she asked as she pulled away, showing an enigmatic
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smile. But when she squeezed my hand in hers and winked, I found
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assurance that we had an understanding.
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Next, she helped me on with my jacket and kissed me quite fine.
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Afterward, I spent a long moment to look into those Erin pools of hers
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before finally speaking my heart's thought. "I cannot know if you hail
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from before or aft on time's line," I whispered, pressing my cheek to
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hers. "But I appreciate inclusion amongst your collection -- and I look
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forward to returning . . . good night, Eva Bartlett."
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Though I fully expected her to exhibit surprise at my assertion, it
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was I who became amazed. Rather than looking aghast, her smile became
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bitter-sweet and a lone, salty tear puddled in her right eye. "Such a
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wonder, you are -- does your woman know this?" Lastly -- putting me out
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door with a push -- she muttered, "When next you come the two of us must
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|
find another entertainment. Off with you, now! And remember to thank
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that misses of yours."
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|
And that, as they say, was that. Once again, I was walking the
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streets; this time, homeward bound. Yet, I remain curious. For if my
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assumption is correct, there remains a wonder yet to be satisfied. Not
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whether Eva is from a future time, or, if she survives as a relic of
|
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|
events past. Either way from that question, she it is a fact that she
|
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and the pub exist. And not that I am right -- that she is a Bartlett,
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|
that is.
|
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|
My nosiness lies in the thought that she regards me collectable and
|
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|
worthy of distinction among the bibers at the Liberty Tree. To date,
|
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|
none of my words or compiled works warrants notoriety, let alone
|
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|
immortality. So, I am encouraged to return to the stylus and page of
|
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|
my time; thrilled by the prospect of discovering words rought in gold,
|
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|
timeless, and noteworthy. But I shant stay away quite so long this next
|
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|
time. All the sooner shall I return to that hallowed hall; in search of
|
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copious spirits, food for the soul, and inspiration . . .
|
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. . . and, mayhap, some dose of eternal bliss.
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* * *
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Copyright 1994 Don M. Hanna
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----------------------------------------------------------------------
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Don, author of the Liberty Tree stories, remarks that the existance
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of the pub will be explained in episode #3, "RELATIVES." In addition
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to this on-going series, he promises other short stories soon to appear,
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and a new series, THE TIME TRIPPER TALES, slated for publication in 1995.
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He can be reached: netmail at 1:2601/522 or WRITERS BIZ, 412-588-7863.
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=======================================================================
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