109 lines
2.6 KiB
Plaintext
109 lines
2.6 KiB
Plaintext
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* *
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* *
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* ODE TO THE PHONE *
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* ^^^ ^^ ^^^ ^^^^^ *
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* --- -- --- ----- *
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* *
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* *
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* Written by: DIPPY BIRD *
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* *
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* *
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* *
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* Call these: *
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* *
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* The Bird Cage AE - 604/321-8850 *
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* Time Machine - 604/590-0851 *
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* Secret Service - 206/833-3982 *
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* *
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* *
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* "40 columns, for the best" *
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* *
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* *
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The phone. A majestic peice of equipment. It is only a machine, but we think
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of it as our friend. Yes, it is our friend. It all started many years ago,
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with a crazy old chap named Alex. He sort of put the whole sha-bang to gether.
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Well anyway, it was a groovey invention and has led to those numerous calls to
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the Disneyland Pay Phone. We all know that one can benefit from the friendship
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incorporated with one of those cheap little 99 cent jobbies at K-mart. In this
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fine "Phoney" Phile, I have put together a collection of poetic Phoneaphenelia.
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There once was a phone named Fred
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Who occasonally said:
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"You have dialed a number to which
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long distance charges apply."
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It scared me, oh my!
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I met with a group of Spock's
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Who gave me a little black box
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They thought me how to "phreak"
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by letting the box give a squeek
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But soon it was over
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Said my fuffy dog, Rover
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Some men came to the door
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And engaged in a dreadful chore.
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They locked me up in a little cell,
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it wasnt bad exept for the smell
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It kind of reminds me of my box
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As I sit examining these iron locks
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- Annonymous phreaker
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I willy wike my widdle Phone
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I even got touch tone
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Its wike another fweind
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I can talk and talk for no end
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- Elmer Phudd
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Every child needs a phone
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so he wont feel so alone
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It helps them get in touch
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with info and such
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- Dr. Joyce Brothers
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I dial the number to a local board
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and check my little software hoard
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I am really out of my gourd
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as I forgot to plug in the cord!
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- Larry the Leech
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A good sex aid can be the phone
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providing you use your bone
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but remember to grunt and groan
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Because telephone sex I dont condone!
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- Dr. Ruth Westhiemer
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Here sit high and stoned
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thinking of the 10 meg I phoned
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I'm so stoned I cant ryme
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so go away.
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- Stanley Stoner
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And so you see, the phone is
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poetic, the phone is magnetic.
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I like to believe that there is a
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little phone inside each and every one
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of us. Goodnight, and have your pet
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spayed or neutered.
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* * *
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Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open
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