169 lines
9.0 KiB
Plaintext
169 lines
9.0 KiB
Plaintext
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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The Lawless Society
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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Welcome To The Lawless Society. Issue #7.
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Well this is the 7th issue of TLS. Lucky number 7. The following file is an
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article ripped from the pages of Playboy. It comes from the June 1992 issue.
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This article is a bit humorous but should also be taken seriously. Sex in the
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90's can kill you. But other than that, if you're a man, you have a real good
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chance of ending up in jail if you're not careful about what you do. I hope
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you guys enjoy it, here goes...
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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The Stud Muffin Quiz
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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Let us assume for the moment that you are a genuine stud muffin. You are
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an attractive man and you like women. Sometimes they like you. You date a
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lot and there are a number of notches on your dick. For you, sex is not
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complicated. Sex is fun and games and you would like to play forever.
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But something strange is happening in your world. Mr. Happy is fine, but
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the society you live in is growing darker and more angry. There are new
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complexities to the dating game. Terms like date rape and acquaintance rape
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and he-said-she-said incidents are cramping your style. These days you seem
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to be less a stud muffin and more a stud pancake.
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"I used to be worried about being rejected by women," you say. "But now I'm
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worried about losing my job or going to jail if I make the wrong move. I
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don't know what the rules are anymore."
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Your worries are legitimate. As we have seen over the past few years, men
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are now especially vulnerable to charges of sexual misconduct. From Thomas to
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Smith to Tyson, a contentious area of the law is being explored, and men are
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confused about the rules and about what women want (and don't want) in social
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situations.
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But confusion kills, gentlemen, and it can also be used as an excuse for
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much misbehavior. So I have prepared a quiz to cut through the debate and
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answer some of your questions.
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What follows is the Stud Muffin Quiz. It looks like a multiple choice
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test, but watch out. There is only one correct response to each of these
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examples, and if you flunk this test in real life, you will not pass go and
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you might go to jail:
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(1) An attractive female colleague at work seems to be friendly, humorous,
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even bawdy. Her cubicle is near yours and you enjoy her presence. The two of
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you talk and joke; she is single and mentions no significant other. You
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eventually ask her if she would like to meet you after work for a drink. She
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says, "No, sorry, I can't." At which point you:
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A: Grab your crotch and say "Hey, you don't know what you're missing."
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B: Hang around her desk all day chanting "Please baby, please baby, please
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baby, please."
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C: Refuse to take "no" for an answer and ask her out again every day for the
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next three months until she accepts.
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D: Smile politely, say "I understand" and never again mention meeting
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socially unless she brings it up.
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(2) In an attempt to appear cultured, you skip a Saturday afternoon with
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your bowling league and go to an art exhibit. As you stand in front of a
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painting a beautiful redheaded woman says, "Doesn't that use of acrylics turn
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you on?" She invites you out for a drink, and as you sit there with her, she
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casually puts her hand on your fly and says, "Let's go back to my place."
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Just inside her front door, the two of you fall into a passionate embrace, but
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she suddenly breaks away and cries, "No, stop, I can't do this. My body may
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want you but my head won't allow it." You:
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A: Rip off all her clothes and carry her into her bedroom.
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B: Fall at her feet and whine "Please baby, please baby, please baby,
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please."
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C: Say "I never take 'no' for an answer" and pull her down to the floor
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with you.
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D: Stop what the two of you have been doing, say "I understand" and get the
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hell out of there as fast as you can.
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(3) You have been dating a woman for several months and you have been a sly
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fox about it. You never make the first move, you always stop when she asks
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you to stop and your perpetual horniness has been well disguised. The two of
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you have had some hot petting sessions, but you have yet to go all the way.
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This night by the lake seems to be the moment. She is naked, you are naked;
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she holds your erection in her hands as she sits astride you and seems ready
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to insert it. But a stricken look crosses her face, and she abruptly slides
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off and huddles on a far corner of the blanket. "No," she cries, "It wouldn't
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be right." You:
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A: Drag her back on top of you.
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B: Snuggle behind her and slip it in before she knows it.
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C: Grunt once and say "I suppose a blow job is out of the question?"
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D: Take a deep breath, say "I understand" and go jump in the lake.
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(4) You are doing it. She loves it, you love it; there seem to be no
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complications and happiness is a thing called intercourse. All of the forces
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in the universe gather in your groin and your orgasm is near; hers have
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passed. Suddenly she pushes you away. "This is wrong. This is immoral and I
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should never have agreed to it," she says. You:
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A: Say "Tell it to the judge" and reenter her.
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B: Say nothing and reenter her.
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C: Whine, cry, bicker, moan, gasp and yell before you reenter her.
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D: Grit your teeth, stop in mid-stroke, pull out, remember that there are
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no witnesses at this moment and that it will be your word against hers
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in a court of law and leave immediately, if not sooner.
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There you have it. A tough quiz for tough times. Item "D" is the only
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acceptable answer in each instance. And I am telling you as bluntly as I can
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that, as men, we now operate without choice in this area of our lives. Once
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she says no, it's over. So here are some new rules:
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Always take "no" for an answer.
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Always stop when asked to stop.
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Never assume "no" means "yes."
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If her lips tell you "no" but there's "yes" in her eyes, keep in mind that
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her words, not her eyes, will appear in the court transcript.
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It's not Kansas anymore, gentlemen. So you'd better live and date
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defensively. If it will help, have a chuckle and think of it like this: Even
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Toto might bring you up on charges one day if you're not careful.
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That's just the way it is pancake.
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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Although that "quiz" is a bit humorous, it is 100% correct. Women hold the
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entire deck in this card game, and it's their deal, not yours. Be careful
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about what you choose to do. Even an innocent kiss as a friend to a friend
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can get you in a heap o' shit if it's done in the workplace. Sex might be
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great on one special night, but one horrible night later on when you're
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fighting can turn that special night into a rape case.
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Just remember, sex with a woman is great if you do what you're supposed to
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and don't push her to fast. Sex with Bubba in cell block "C" is a living hell
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and the chick just ain't worth it!
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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Once again...If anyone would care to write for TLS on just about any subject
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please leave mail to either myself or Hegz on the boards listed below.
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If you would like to join TLSNet you can most likely download the application
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file from the board that you got this file from. The file should be named
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"TLSNET.APP". If you can't find this file, it can be downloaded free at
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either of the boards listed below along with over 50 megs of free text
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downloads.
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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////// // //////
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|||
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// // //
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// // //////
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// // //
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|||
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// ////// //////
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|||
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
|
|||
|
|
The Lawless Society
|
|||
|
|
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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|||
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-Flammable Fuzzball
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-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
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The Syndicate BBS (TLS Headquarters) (908)506-6651
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-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
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Tanstaafl BBS (TANJ Headquarters) (908)830-TANJ
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-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
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