207 lines
12 KiB
Plaintext
207 lines
12 KiB
Plaintext
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$$ .d""b. .d""b. HOE E'ZINE #1078
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[-- $$""b. $$ $$ $$ $$ -- ------------------------------------------- --]
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$$ $$ $$ $$ $$ss$$ "My Alligator Dancing Shoes"
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$$ $$ $$ $$ $$ by, Rhea
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$$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ 05/15/00
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[-- $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ $$ -- ------------------------------------------- --]
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$$ $$ "TssT" "TssT"
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baBOOM baBOOM baBOOM baBOOM strange things were coursing through
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me, I swear it baBOOM baBOOM and it was more than just the frenzied
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frantic frustrating rhythm of my heart beating that made me so crazy.
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baBOOM it kind of made me crazy kind of made me baBOOM baBOOM kind of
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made me want to dance.
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Things started. Life was sick of dancing with me because I barely
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even shuffled my feet and the rhythm, the baBOOM in me, wasn't too easy
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to groove to. I just wasn't where it's at, I guess. All I can say is
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that some things _didn't_ start, too, and probably never will. Where
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it's at baBOOM this scat that baBOOM baBOOM that was kind of making me
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crazy.
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baBOOM baBOOM baBOOM -- I used to think that _that's_ what makes
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the world go round, that rhythm of life of fucking life of fucking of --
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Strange things were coursing through me. That is... if the world _is_
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round, I thought. I was thinking, how do you even _know_ the world is
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endless? How do you know it's round and round and round? As if the
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pulsing baBOOM baBOOM didn't make me nauseous enough, I thought. I was
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dizzy, too, now, and it was kind of making me crazy. I remember
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thinking, how do you know the end of the earth isn't somewhere in the
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middle of the unchartered Australian outback or something? It probably
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is, I thought! Yes. I decided it was.
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Then I thought, _that's_ why Crocodile Dundee is so fucking smart!
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Yeah, I always saw those deep crevices in his thick, brown leathery skin
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and guessed there was some kind of strange wisdom hidden there, like a
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fountain of knowledge dancing in there, right in his ruggedly handsome
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masculine face, to a rhythm I always wanted to hear. Crocodile Dundee,
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king of the Aussie outback, has been face to ruggedly handsome face with
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the end of the earth. The end of the earth is where it's at, hey! it's
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always been flat baBOOM baBOOM this scat baBOOM those Australian bats that
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he could call so easily. Okay, so I admit it, I was kind of in love.
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Maybe it was _that_ crazy energy that was coursing through me so
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strangely, combined with the beating of that round fleshy organ in the
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middle of my chest that made the blood pulse through my body. Dying?
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Living? His hand pressed so sensually against the hollow of my wrist,
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feeling the pulse, the rhythm, the groove -- and then starting to move...
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those thick, callused hands had wrestled crocodiles! It was too exciting
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to bear, the thought of Crocodile Dundee holding the big jaws of a
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writhing, leathery beast shut and controlling the frantic movements
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beneath him with the weight of his strong, powerful body. That's a dance
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if nothing is a dance... human against nature... just two living creatures
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dancing with each other and writhing with each other and moving with each
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other to a baBOOM baBOOM rhythm of life and okay, so I admit it, I was
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kind of in love. And it was kind of making me crazy.
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Things started. Crocodile Dundee and his troupe of absurd
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alligators started hunting me, I think, and yeah that was a completely
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different kind of excitement, but it was strange, too. My blood was
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tingling and strange things were coursing through me and maybe it was the
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rush of adrenaline in the chase that made me feel so _alive_. The beating
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of my heart was getting faster and faster as I ran and I remember feeling
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it pulse through my forehead. It was throbbing, and my ears felt a kind of
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throbbing too, almost, as the warm pulsing tingling blood rushed to my
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head. They say to run zig-zag when an alligator is chasing you. I think I
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remember Crocodile Dundee whispering that in my ears on one steamy
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Australian night, and of course I remembered. baBOOM baBOOM I remembered
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everything that wild passionate man ever told me with his gruff but
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sensual voice, thick with that Aussie twang that just thrilled me so much.
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Thrilled me. The thrills were coursing through me and it was strange. I
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never even really knew how to dance. I guess I always had the baBOOM
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baBOOM the baBOOM the rhythm inside me but I well I was too wrapped up in
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the dizzying world going round and round because I thought _that_ was
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what made the world go round. But Crocodile Dundee chasing me with his
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troupe of absurd alligators and with those dead crocodile skins hanging
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from his pack taught me that it was really _love_ that made the world go
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round, after all, even though the world wasn't even round at all!
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And what I loved more than anything was staring into the deep wise
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crevices in his ruggedly handsome face and knowing all the while that the
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end of the earth was in there somewhere -- in that vast unchartered
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Australian outback -- and that he had seen it. Yes, I admit it. I was in
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love with him. He had been where it's at and knew that it was all flat.
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baBOOM baBOOM this rhythm, that scat.
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But then, as he kept chasing me and as baBOOM baBOOM my heart rate
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increased and adrenaline and thrills and love coursed through me all of a
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baBOOM sudden things started. The absurd alligators who were with my
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ruggedly handsome love started chanting things, hissing things -- bad
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things -- at me. They were just angry with me for running zig-zag,
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probably, and I think Crocodile Dundee had whispered something to me
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about their anger but that must have been when his hand, so thick and
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callused, was pressed so sensually to the throbbing pulsing hollow of my
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wrist because well because it was kind of making me crazy and it baBOOM
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was kind of making me kind of making me crazy so I guess I forgot what he
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said...
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Strange things were coursing through me and it was more than just
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the frenzied frantic frustrating rhythm of my heart beat and it was more
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than the dizzying nausea of the turning world that wasn't turning inside
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the deep ravines of knowledge on his tanned, leathery face. Now it was
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fear. I looked down and saw that my shoes, my dancing shoes that Crocodile
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Dundee had given me -- he had pulled them out of his pack with those thick
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strong callused hands -- were responding to the hissing of the absurd
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alligators behind me.
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And that's when I realized that the dancing shoes weren't made of
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crocodile skin like I had thought, but of absurd alligator skin, and at
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the hisses and chants of the troupe behind me the dead alligators on my
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shoes were stirring back to life. They say you should run zig-zag from
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alligators, but things change when the alligators are on your own feet.
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Yes, things were starting. Strange things were coursing through me and
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baBobaOObaOObamOObOOBom now things baBaOBbaOOabmOaOOmb were bMOO distorted
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and BOOMbA the rhythm baOBaobBaooOOmO was disbOOmAtorted, too. I tried to
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run zig-zag inBaOMMa my danciOOMbang shoes but even the rhythm from my
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feet hitting the hard dusty ground of the unchartered Australian outback
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was disBaBOabOOmMaBoBAmtorted. So I stopped.
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I was feeling nauseous.
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And dizzy.
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Then my alligator dancing shoes started snapping at my feet,
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biting my feet, and my ruggedly handsome Crocodile Dundee and his troupe
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of absurd alligators were still running towards me. I couldn't move. It
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wasn't rhythm and now it wasn't adrenaline and it wasn't even love now
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anymore but it was kind of making me crazy. My feet were consumed with
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pain.
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Suddenly Crocodile Dundee shouted out to me, "Teach me how to
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dance real slow and they'll let you go," with his gruff but deep and
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sonorous voice, just _dripping_, absolutely _dripping_, with that thick
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Aussie twang. I was suprised. Blood was leaking out of my absurd
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alligator skin dancing shoes and the pain was consuming me. Strange
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things were coursing through me and still I was suprised because I'd
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never heard my ruggedly hansome Aussie love shout before.
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I just stood there. I was feeling nauseous, and dizzy, and it was
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kind of making me crazy. "I'm sorry for stealing your watch!" he finally
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shouted, even louder, and the deep wise lines on his tanned leathery face
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stood out even more, because he was frowing. The blood was leaking out
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into a big puddle that soaked quickly into the dusty, dry land of the
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unchartered Australian outback. It was probably starving for nutrients.
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My dancing shoes were still biting me and my heart was beating very
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erratically, very arhythmically, very painfully. "I'm sorry for stealing
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your watch," Crocodile Dundee cried again.
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I looked at my wrist, the same wrist that he had pressed his hand
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against so sensually, and it was bare. I had forgotten all about my watch
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during my craziness. But now I remembered, more clearly than ever, that
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it was the watch that had made my dancing just shuffling back in the
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beginning. The ticking and tocking of the watch had been pressed coldly
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against the hollow of my wrist but now it was too late, everything was too
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late. Crocodile Dundee, so smart, so smart, held out my watch to me, a
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pathetic pleading expression on his ruggedly handsome face. I could
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barely move my bleeding, painful feet, but somehow I managed, because I
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was sick of being crazy. I took a step towards him, and then
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baOOBaOmMAbOOmABaABOOmbOmAa
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tick
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I took a step
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tock
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baBOOaBmA
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towards him, and then the absurd alligators burst into laughter.
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It was a cruel, bad, mean hissing noise. And then even Crocodile Dundee,
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still holding my watch, burst into laughter too... deep, hearty chuckles.
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baOMaBAticktockBaOOM rhythms were arythmical and yes I was finally yes I
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was finally baOOMTICKBAOmAAtock falling falling falling into a pit that I
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hadn't seen when I took my step.
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Crocodile Dundee whispered, as I fell, "Welcome to where it's at"
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and then he threw a dead crocodile skin -- one that he had wrestled to
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death with his bare hands, so strong and callused, as it writhed beneath
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his strong powerful body -- into the end of the earth after me. He threw
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it in after me so that if I looked up towards the unchartered Australian
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outback that I had fallen from, I couldn't see the sky... all I could see
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was the crocodile skin falling after me.
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And I could hear the laughter. And the rhythm -- I could hear
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that, too, baBOOmtickbaBOOMtock, mixed in with the laughter. They all
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melted together, as I fell. It became the strangest music... it was so
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strange, and it was coursing through me, this music. It wasn't dancing
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music, but that was okay, because my feet were too mangled to dance, and
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anyway, I was falling. I was falling to the strangest music, coursing
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through me.
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At least I wasn't crazy anymore. Crocodile Dundee had tricked me
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into falling off the end of the earth, and the strangest music was
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coursing through me, but at least it wasn't making me crazy anymore.
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...and I fell, and I fell, and I fell...
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...and then I remembered! I remembered where I had heard the
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music before! It was just the music played during the credits of a dumb
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movie I had seen one day called "Crocodile Dundee."
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...and I guess it had kind of made me crazy.
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[-------------------------------------------------------------------------]
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[ (c) HOE E'ZINE -- http://www.hoe.nu HOE #1078, BY RHEA - 5/15/00 ]
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