68 lines
3.6 KiB
Plaintext
68 lines
3.6 KiB
Plaintext
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Dear WiZ,
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I have wanted to tell you for some time Just how much I enJoy your column. next
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to handcuffing the old ladies wrists to her ankles and then {++++++}, its the
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most fun I get all month.
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I have been going through a lot of trouble trying to get lift charge [very
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coarse black powder], as black powder is considered class "A", it is next to
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impossible to obtain locally. I had tried the CIA method, and ball milling, but
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they are both more trouble then worth.
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My results using perchlorate/charcoal have been less then good, damnedest run
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of flower pots you ever saw. is there any thing else that I can use for lift?
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L.fascinus
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Ah, your timing is impeccable for Just the other day I had put some time into
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divining a replacement for bp for use as lift charge. my investigations lead me
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on a search for substances that can be easily nitrated and are at the same time
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readily available.
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A chance conversation with a relative brought forth the information that she
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had, "had it" with the cat, and therefore trucked it over to the local animal
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shelter. discreet inQuiries uncovered the information that while dogs were kept
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for 48 hours, cats were not kept at all. "when you go out the front door, they
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go out the back."
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With an unlimited supply of material to work with, [if they give you any static
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about taking the bodies, Just tell them "well i guess finding a cure for cancer
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will Just take a little longer", works every time.] a few Quick experiments
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were tried. first freeze drying: left one of the furry suckers in the frost
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free fridge for 6 months, at the end of that time it was found to be completely
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mummified, it was then a simple a matter of putting it into a sack and the
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breaking it up with a hammer.the resulting pieces were "nitrated" using nitric
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acid produced by the CIA method.
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After processing, it was found to be to slow burning for use as lift charge.
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{worked ok in fountains ,etc thou.} a determination was made that the bone
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minerals were slowing down the burn rate. as removing the bones before freeze
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drying would be rather messy, another procedure was sort.
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After not a little bit of work, the following method was found to produce lift
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charge of great utility. [pussy lift - purr lift].
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First skin the animal out, the procedure used by the sioux indians for skinning
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sQuirrels, works real nice. place the skinned carcass in a plastic bucket and
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cover it with a strong nitric acid solution, then let it sit two weeks or so in
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the shade, to react.
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Take the removed skin and hang it out to dry. after drying cut it up into
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little pieces and in turn place them into an enameled pot. with a solution of
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nitric and sulphuric acids (battery acid will do nicely for the sulphuric). put
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it on the fire and let the mixture simmer, out of doors for six hours or so.
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the nitration of the hair from the animal will produce picric acid, which when
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added to the nitrated carcass will help overcome the calcium and etc in the
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bones. combine the two mixtures and then boil (in the enameled pot) until a
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thick gruel is obtained. pour the mixture out on to a flat surface and let it
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dry slowly in the sun. after drying carefully break up the large pieces by hand
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or with a rubber mallet, sieve it and put in a safe place until your next
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shoot.
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While the supply of gone pussies is rather large, there seems to be a
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substantial variation in the number of cats disposed of day by day with peak
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production occurring on april 1st.
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Good shooting and thanks for writing the WiZ.
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Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open
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