214 lines
7.0 KiB
Plaintext
214 lines
7.0 KiB
Plaintext
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/ Ctrl-S to Start/Stop Ctrl-X to exit/
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/-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-\
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/ YOU KNOW IT'S A BAD DAY... \
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< by: >
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\ Red Phantom /
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\-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-/
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%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
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%% The Lazy Dragon...............(312)/(728-4069) %%
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%% Armageddon....................(312)/(967-0848) %%
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%% The Music Box.................(312)/(774-0202) %%
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%% Ripco International...........(312)/(528-5020) %%
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%% Blue Skies....................(312)/(386-0499) %%
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%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
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::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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We've all had our bad days. But exactly just HOW bad it is has been
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undeterminable, until now. If you THINK that you've had a bad day, compare it
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with the following guidelines for a bad day.
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::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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YOU KNOW IT'S A BAD DAY WHEN...
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============================
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You try to dry your hair in a microwave oven.
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Your little sister tries to flush a bannana down the toilet.
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You lose the piece of paper where you had your passwords written.
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You remember that you accidently threw out the piece of paper with all your
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passwords on it, and you have to rummage through 5 feet of garbage to look
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for it.
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After looking through the garbage for an hour, you realize that you have a
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text file of your passwords saved to disk.
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You forget to turn the computer off before you start messing around with the
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inside of it.
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Your air conditioner breaks down right in the middle of a heat wave.
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You accidently burn a whole in the floor during Chemistry Lab.
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You feel like listening to an ABBA album.
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You seal an envelope before you put in the letter.
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The radio station you're listening to starts playing the new song by George
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Michael and Elton John.
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You destroy your radio because it started playing the new song by George
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Michael and Elton John.
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You remember that you payed $150 for the radio which you just destroyed.
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You forget to turn off your computer while you're away for the weekend.
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Your car runs out of gas while you're driving in the South Side of Chicago late
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at night.
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You forget to study for a final exam.
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Your car gets stalled at a railroad crossing.
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Your disk drive starts to smoke when you turn on your computer.
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You get your access lowered on a BBS.
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You taste 40% Bran Flakes, and find out that you LIKE THEM!
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You go to school and wait outside for two hours before you realize it's
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Saturday.
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You cram four hours for a test that you think will be given tomorrow, but
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you find out that it will be a week from tomorrow.
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You find out that you are not a cool dude.
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You have to boot 200+ disks to look for a particular program.
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You try to look straight into an eclipse.
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You accidently enter a gay bar.
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Your passwords all get deleted because you forget to tell the sysops that
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you were going on vacation for the summer.
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You get expelled from school.
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You attempt to extinguish a grease fire by pouring water on it.
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Your car has a full tank, but still doesn't run.
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You remember that, although your car only takes unleaded gas, you filled it
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up with regular.
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Someone else has used your handle while you were out of town, and has ruined
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your reputation.
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You begin to post a message but forgot what you wanted to post about.
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You hear the song by Elton John and George Michael so many times that you
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start to like it.
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You forget to adjust your clock for Daylight Savings Time and arrive at
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school an hour late.
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You see it begin to rain, and remember that you forgot to put the top up on
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your convertible.
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You try to boot a disk for 5 minutes, and wonder why it isn't working.
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You open your drive and find out that you put the disk in sideways.
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You realize that your disk drive head is probably ruined by now.
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You get Dead or Alive's "Youthquake" album as a present.
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You become sick to your stomach after getting a certain album as a present.
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Your furnace breaks down when it's 30 degrees below zero outside.
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You find out that you are blocking against William Perry in Sunday's Bears
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game.
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You try to lick the third rail on an "El" platform.
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You see a text file that you wrote with someone else's name on it.
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You find out that you're going south for the winter---to Antarctica.
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You forget to take the garbage out, and it has to sit there for another week.
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You attempt to eat a Frozen T.V. Dinner without cooking it.
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You find out that your friend tried to sharpen a pen in your $80 electric
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pencil sharpener.
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You buy a 10 megabyte hard drive and find out that it won't work with your
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motherboard.
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Your little brother thinks that your floppies are 45" singles and tries to
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play them on the stereo.
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You accidently initalize the disk with your software list on it, and have to
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boot up 200+ disks to redo it.
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You find out that you have to read a 500 page novel in two days.
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You try to use a hair dryer while still in the shower in order to "save time."
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You find out that you are having a bad day.
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::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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# of Guidelines Your day's
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you match with: ranking:
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=============== ==========
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50 You've had a helluva
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day. Go to sleep.
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40 You've had a real bad
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day.
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30 You've had a somehwat
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rough day...now it's
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Miller Time.
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20 and lower Consider yourself
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lucky!
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::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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A man who gives "Dear Abby" advice---
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(] Red Phantom [)
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[11-17-85]
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[TMB] Which (1-81 ?,<CR>)two days.
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You try to use a hair dryer while still in the shower in order to "save time."
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You find out that you are having a bad day.
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::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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# of Guidelines Your day's
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you match with: ranking:
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=============== ==========
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50 You've had a helluva
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day. Go to sleep.
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40 You've had a real bad
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day.
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30 You've had a somehwat
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rough day...now it's
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Miller Time.
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20 and lower Consider yourself
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lucky!
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::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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A man who gives "Dear Abby" advice---
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