184 lines
5.7 KiB
Plaintext
184 lines
5.7 KiB
Plaintext
|
()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()
|
|||
|
|
()() ()()
|
|||
|
|
()() The "REAL" Leech Guide Part I ()()
|
|||
|
|
()() Scribed by : ()()
|
|||
|
|
()() ()()
|
|||
|
|
()() The Shithead of Television ()()
|
|||
|
|
()() - TSOT ()()
|
|||
|
|
()() ()()
|
|||
|
|
()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Leech (Le' ch): n; any person that has mastered the art of taking and not
|
|||
|
|
giving.
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Although there was a long paper on our society, the person who wrote that item
|
|||
|
|
was in error.
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Supreme Leech (<-Moi!)
|
|||
|
|
/ \
|
|||
|
|
Catline Leech Homosexual Leech
|
|||
|
|
/ \ / \
|
|||
|
|
AE Leech BBS Leech Transvestite Bisexual
|
|||
|
|
/ / \ \
|
|||
|
|
Shithead Pascal Programmer But-Fuk Trisexual(M,F,Animal)
|
|||
|
|
/ / \ \
|
|||
|
|
Nark Fortran Prog. Dick lick Quadsexual(M,F,A,Insect)
|
|||
|
|
/ / \ \
|
|||
|
|
PHED Volvo Driver Toilet Sucker Pentasexual(M,F,A,I,Alien)
|
|||
|
|
/ / \ \
|
|||
|
|
AT&T Investigator Logo Programmer Gutter Drinker Kmart shopper
|
|||
|
|
/ / \ \
|
|||
|
|
Ma Bell New Coke Liker Gutter liver Kmart Blue Light shopper
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
This is the true society, although many real pirates think that our society is
|
|||
|
|
otherwise, this documentation will hopefully show them what our society is
|
|||
|
|
really like. (By the way if someone is higher than another on this list, it
|
|||
|
|
means that they are that much lower that everyone else.)
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Now onto what real leeches do:
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
We ...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Leech off of lines at 3 oclock in the afternoon, or whenever the SYSOP doesn't
|
|||
|
|
want us to...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
But-fuk homo's at 10:30 in the morning to make sure that they are rested...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Burn our grass and time how long it will take to grow again...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Harrass people just because they said our name the wrong way...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Make sure our friends are 11 years old...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Shit in our pants and make our 11 year old friends eat it...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Shit in our pants again and show it too our sisters...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Stare in awe of messages left by other leeches that make us confused... EX:
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Message #10
|
|||
|
|
Msg Left By: THE SHITHEAD OF TELEVISION
|
|||
|
|
Date Posted: Someday in 1985
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW HOW TO USE MCI CODES ON SPRINT, AND I WOULD REALLY LIKE
|
|||
|
|
TO KNOW WHY THIS GUY NAME TSOR IS COPYING MY NAME???
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
-TSOT
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
we love to make up names incase we get discovered...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
EX: (I made these up!!!!!!!!)
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Pirates Disks (Does he really?)
|
|||
|
|
Doctor Disks (He fixxes hurt or sick disks?)
|
|||
|
|
Hybrid Horseshoes (???)
|
|||
|
|
Jumpin Housou (???)
|
|||
|
|
The Lude Dude (???)
|
|||
|
|
The Crude and Lude Dude (???)
|
|||
|
|
The Awesomely Crude and Lude Rude Dude (TACALRD)
|
|||
|
|
The Lude Crude Rude and Super Shrewd Dude (TLCRASSD)
|
|||
|
|
Super Human Interesting Transvestite (SHIT)
|
|||
|
|
Freddy the Udoing Cuplink Kracker(FUCK)
|
|||
|
|
ETC...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
WE...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Wonder why sysops delete our passwords when our name is: SYSOP SUCKS...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Watch Revenge of the Nerds fifty times and wonder why they look like us...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Put up a unmodified Net-Works board and call it: The Leech Line, and wonder
|
|||
|
|
why nobody ever posts on it...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Put up AE lines with a 132 meg hard drive that our mommy bought for us and put
|
|||
|
|
sneakers on volume 1 and leave the rest for uploading...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Erase all new wares on our 132 meg AE line after we put them on our Computer
|
|||
|
|
Land diskettes that we bought for $45.95, and wonder why we get stuff that we
|
|||
|
|
already have like: Choplifter and Frogger, but we still put them on our blanks,
|
|||
|
|
cause that a
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Stick straws up our cats ass and make him range dial while blowing in the
|
|||
|
|
straw...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Watch our cat have sex with the neighbors cat...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Fuk our dog when she is in heat...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Wonder why we dont have any girl friends...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Wonder why we have a 3 year old's voice...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Wonder why we have only 1 friends (the 11 year old)...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Wonder why REAL pirates hate us when we offer to give them KARATEKA...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Often go skinny dipping in public pools and wonder why everyone leaves in a
|
|||
|
|
rush...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Prove that we are entering puberty by showing REAL fags our dicks...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Like to watch rated G films...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Dont understand what happened in the movie DEBBY DOES DALLAS...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Wonder why the people at movie theaters wont let us into PG-13 films when we
|
|||
|
|
are 17...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Dont know why people want to see the MADONA PENTHOUSE issue...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Dont know why our dads call us wimps...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Are offered a subscription to PENTHOUSE for free, and we dont take it...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Are offered a subscription to PLAYGIRL and take it...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Wonder why people tease us about wearing our pants so high...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Read text files about us, and wonder what they mean when they call us
|
|||
|
|
BUT-FUCKERS...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Try to make friends with a two year old, but decide that their voice is lower
|
|||
|
|
than ours and we dont like that, so we kick their ass in, but it ussually take
|
|||
|
|
about 10 minutes to win...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Wonder why we have to change names so often...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Wonder why people hate us so much...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Make threats of beating someones ass in on the local C-64 board...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Call the local C-64 and try to get CO-SYSOP on it...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Tell the C-64 sysops that we will kick their ass in if they dont give us
|
|||
|
|
CO-SYSOP...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Finally get CO-SYSOP, and then we decide we dont want it anyway, and tell him
|
|||
|
|
to delete ourselves...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Then call back under a different name and start it all over again...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Wonder why our parents let us stay out all night...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Dont stay out all night anyway...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Wonder why our parents encourage us to go to a movie with our only
|
|||
|
|
friend(remember the 11 year old?)...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Rent VHS movies and wonder why they dont work on our Beta...
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Well I have to go leeching now, I will write some more very soon...L8R
|
|||
|
|
|
|||
|
|
Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open
|
|||
|
|
|