38 lines
2.0 KiB
Standard ML
38 lines
2.0 KiB
Standard ML
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Santa's Favorite Jokes.......
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Santa loves a good joke. He must -- he tells the same ones over and over
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again, time after time! Here are some of his favorites:
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I just got back from my yearly flight around the world. Boy, are my arms
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tired!...After I left home, I wrote my mother that I'd grown another foot.
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So she knit me another sock.
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Let me tell you about the Ice Nymphs. Once three nymphs were sleeping in
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the same bed. It was so crowded that one got out and slept on the floor.
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After a while, one of the Nymphs said to the one on the floor, "You ought
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to get back in the bed with us. There's lots more room now!"... Once the
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Nymphs were out playing football. One of the players asked the coach to
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flood the field so he could go in as a sub.
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Then there are the elves. One of the elves is great at magic. He walked
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around the corner and turned into an outhouse....One elf snored so loud he
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woke himself up. But then he solved the problem -- he started sleeping in
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the next room....Everyone knows the elves are famous for the baths they take
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each year. But perhaps you don't know what the first elf in the tub is
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called -- he's the ringleader.....We've got one elf who just hates to take
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baths. Once he got so dirty that when he finally took a bath he found some
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underwear he thought he'd lost three years before.
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With all my expertise over the years I've learned some interesting things.
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For instance, if a bee and a doorbell get married, what kind of children
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to you think they'll have? Humdingers!....And I've learned why penguins
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cross the road only halfway -- they like to lay it on the line.....I deliver
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toys to a boy who parts his hair from ear to ear. Its a real problem --
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people keep whispering in his nose!
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People always have questions about my reindeer. For instance, they want
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to know why reindeer wear bells. I tell them it's because their horns
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don't work.....Or they ask, "How much reindeer feed do you get for a
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quarter?" My answer: "None. Quarters don't eat reindeer feed!"
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