681 lines
20 KiB
Plaintext
681 lines
20 KiB
Plaintext
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yET
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Another
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Moonie
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trIp
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to
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THE LAND OF ELSE
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----------------
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+ Chemical testing done by Doctor Murdock and Yule Tide joys from Space Ace +
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12/22/89
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Shine On you crazy Psilocybin!
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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Hey, babe....take a walk on the soft side. Walk upon the shallow waters of
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Else and watch the waves splash on the orange rox and roll over the bright red
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sand. Hazzy Dazzy!
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Hey, you...ya gotta spend more time in the water!
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No way! There are sharks in the water....
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Yeah, so? Ever here of a Land shark, stupid?
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Hey I resent that!
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Who does?
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I do.
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You?
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Yes.
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Me?
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Yes.
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AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
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I am a cloud waving good-bye to it's celestrial mother!
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I fish out of air. Black air. Smooth, silent, crisp, cool,
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black air. If it could only be bottled......
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Wow, cut your circulation off until you feel the warmth of the blood trying
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to push through! It's neato.
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/
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dsf . . ./
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./ / / .
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fsdf /> / ./ /
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sd l;/. / . ./
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./ ?8//..// / .
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sdf >/ 8? . ./ /
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sf > /. ./ ./
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/8./8>/ / .
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/
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./
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I am a golden sword with no one to savor the red.! DAMN!
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I never could quite understand the full meaning of Iquablinoxationalism..could
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you? And it ain't in the dictionary, friend. whao.......
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PEEK! PEEK, BABY, PEEK! Can ya feel the quick rush of the Peek? Damn that's
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worth living for....it's even worth walking through the Harckiroids.
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Instantaneous RUSH! RUuuuUUuuUUuUUuUuUuuuuuUUSH! AaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhH
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ahhaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaH!
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Peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeekinnn,,,,,,whoa boy. I'm just on the edge of dropping
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off into totaly limbo. It's amazing cuz I can still type. But my mind is
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like swirling in it's juices. And I'm a puppet of that Blue. That Aqua Blue.
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Yeah, it comes in all kinds......of.....species. That bitchen bluuuuuuueeee.
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Ya know it ain't just quite RIGHT. Well, iiit's right but not like right,
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right? pp-p---ppppppp--peeeeeekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkuuuuuunnnnnnnnnn. aaaahhhhh
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Ror, maaaaaaaaaannn...like there ain't nothin like the Black air. It's so
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smooth. LIke a cigerette ad you see on billboards. Only this doesn't
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advertise, it's all around you and you juist breeeeeeeeeeeaatthh In.
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Oaaoaaaaa, wait a sec....that was a ppppppppEEEEEEEkkkk! ahahahar!
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PeEk peeK pEEK peEk PeeK pEEk Oh yeah? PPPPEeeeEEEEEeEKKK!KK!KKK!!
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Nya! It's time to ramble bamble amble shamble......my mouth ain't working cuz
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it's busy, pEEEEEkin. shift in..
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I just shifted. It's a good thing I was wearing my headfones or I'd be
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one....one....uh.........what was I sayin? Who the fuck is Golem?
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Hey, it's a bitch and moan yesterday! Did you miss your black hole today? I
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think you did! WHOA! The kkkkkeyboard just shifted on me!! It did a 360
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under my fingertips! Or was that my brain did a -360? Whoa..time for another
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tape....ok:
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> We are setting all controls to Left Side Of Tapedeck!
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> We are about to launch, Captain!
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go for it...
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> LAUNCHING!
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(ok...in very unstable state at the moment, sir...please hold....)
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> Ok, Captain! We seem to have made it.....although our controls are shaking
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a bit....it seems that Blue was a little more BLUE than we thought. It's ok
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though, Captain because we seem to have stabalized the controls on a surface
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and then the shaking went into our bbbbbrainsss...and we're now floating. And
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it seems our destination has changed....our original course was set to LZ-1,
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but our current postition is orbiting the Dark Side Of The Moon...go figure,
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eh Cap?
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And what color is the moon?
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> Well Cap'n......it's no color....it's a blank page on the foreground of the
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Universe. Captain....we all thought you would have known that...
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Uh...uh....I meant to ask you what color was the...the....warning
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becon.....yeah...don't you know ANYTHING??
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> Oh, I see. Our fault. So, Cap....what do you think about t
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<<<<<<DANGER DANGER>>>>>>>>
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<<<<<<<THERE WAS A SHIFT>>>>>>>
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"Attention all crew: There is no cause for alarm. We just seem
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to be having a few Shift's now and again. It could be that Blue thats hanging
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out with you at the moment. That Bitchen Blue? Anyhow....you can exppect
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these Shifts on and off for about the next 5 or 6 hours. Return to your
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duties....whatever you do up there."
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> Bad news. THose Shifts are UN cool. They are like the TRUE meaning of UN.
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Whoa....the controls are slightly shaking again. Wait, I see a pattern!!!
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First the Shifts......and then the Shakes! And the Peeks come at any ranDOm
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moment..uuuhhhuuhuhuhuhhhh, like nOW....please hold..
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<<<<<<<Pausing for maximum Peek>>>>>>>
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Hmmm, it seems the Peek isn't going away. We're on a PEEK for the duration!
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Whoa!
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(Captains Note: Peek.....not Peak, mind you...there IS a difference...)
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> So we our like constantly Peeking then?
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Uh, yes. Isn't that neat? it's like your riding a massive Wave, D00D.
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> Is it? Neat. I've never been on a Wave. And what is a D00D?
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Never mind.
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> Excuse us for a sec, Cap....there seems to be this erie glow coming from
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the light fixture and we are going in for a closer look/examination. It's a
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bitchen Black Light, it is....
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Ok.
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<<<<<Pausing for examination of the great light fixture in sKy>>>>
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> Ok, we're back. Our controls are shaking a bit. It' seems that exerting
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pressure causes our controls to shake.
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How brilliant of you.
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> Hmmm. Well, the light fixture was neat and all, but we seemed a bit
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unstable uppppp there so we came back down. We like looking at it from here
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anyway, Cap'n. Ya mind?
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Me? No not at all. Whatever makes you happy. Whatever gets yer rox off,
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pal. Pals?
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> Yeah...pals.. After all there are about 30 billion of us up here.
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That many, huh?
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> Yeah, THAT many.
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Hmm, we should talk more often. Lets do lunch!
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> yeah, right, ok. Lets do lunch....
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<<<<<<PPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEKKKKK STATION>>>>>>>>>>
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> There go our controls again.......hey there hasn't been a Shift in awhile.
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Hmmm. Ya never can tell whats gonna happen next....eh Joey? Joey?
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Damn....where'd ya go? You all look so much alike. Like....me....geez.
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Are you ok? Nevermind..,...read that backwards so you didn't hear it.
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> Boy...your an intelligent one, aren't you?
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HEY...watchit or I'll.....I'll.......I'll send some more BLUE your way!!
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>Go ahead...
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How bout a little blast of Black Air, smart ass?
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> Uh....umm..go ahead...mmmm....see if...uf www we care?
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Ok..here..
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> NO WAIt.! I mean.....no, pleased waiaiaiiaaiaisdojas'fgkdglfhhgf
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<<<<<<<<<<DANGER DANGER!!!!!>>>>>>>>
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<<<<MAXIMUM PEEK HAS BEEN ACHEIVED>>>>>
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> Tell that computer to shut up.....geez the controls are twitchen big time
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here, Cap'n......what say you give us a hand?
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funny. Aren't we just the little punster tonight...
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> Oh. Well....I didn't mean it that way. Umm, Cap`n? We're gonna go for a
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little stroll into the black hole since the controls are shakin a bit too
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much. We`ll contact you when we get back, ok?
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Yeah, yeah....bust a gut..
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> uh huh. Bye nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwww
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<<<<DANGER DANGER............
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> That'll fix YOU, ya idiot!
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>> Uh, Jim...the meters are reading a little high.
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> Uh huh. Thats what the dumb Computer said.
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>> But it's true!
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> Ask me if I care.
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>> Do you care?
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> You really went and asked me didn't you? NO! I DON'T CARE! Do YOU feel
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threatens by the meters? Just take a moment to decide...
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>> Ummmm.....not...really.
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> Good. Then that's settled. Lets go for that walk....
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>> Righto!
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<<<<OPENING DOOR FOR A WALK THROUGHT THE BLACK HOLE>>>>>
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> Well Cap`n.....all we found there was a few frosty skeletons, really ugly
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lookin corpse's and it was FREEZING!
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That nice. Oh, and keep up the good work!
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> THe controls are no better off. What the hell are you DOING down there??
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Heh heh heh. NOW ya got the picture....
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> welll....heh....whatchadoin?
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Nothin much, you?
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> I mean whatcha doin to US????
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Sendun ya a little Blue! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH!
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> I see. Well what the
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he/.d;df'.,l;'sdfgk,sl;dfgk;sl;fg;lsdfgs;dhk63w450tpfbk;l.,
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9N70I65YORTHKLFGB,.VC /739650YUETHOIKPLGFBN;, V.76U905YHIOPKNLFGB V,
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<<<<cONTRoLS ghONE totALLLLY BAZERKA aNd wE ARE uNABLE tO compREHEND ANY TYPE
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of cOMUNICATIOON, cAAaaaaAaAAAP'nNN >>>>
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> wELL, gUYS. bucklE UP.....wE'RE iN FOR A rIDE. oH boY!
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---------
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| ON |
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-+-10-+-+20-+-+-+-30-+-+-+-+-+-40-+-+-+-41-+-+-+-50-+-+-+-60-+-+12213342+-+-++
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. ,
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., , . .
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,. . , ,.
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, , .
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. ,. . ,. ,. ,. . ...............
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, . , . , . , , ,
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, . , . , . ,. . .
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. ,. . ,. . ,. ,
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, , ,.
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----------------------------------------------------------------------------
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/;/; ; ; ; ;
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/ / ;;; ;;
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/;/; ; / ; ; ; ;;
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/ ;;;; ;; ; 0 ; ; 0 ;
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; ;;; ; ; ;
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;;;;;;;; ; ;;;;
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| | | - Hi. Do you know what your doing?
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Lets see if we can slowly slip into the
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unconscious world of insanity, shall we?
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No? Ahh....c'mon. Goood.
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^ ^
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U U
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o - Well, I see you've lost control
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of your Shift capabilities.
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So'kay. Taste the Black Air,
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while your there. Go ahead...
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taste it....
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> Captain! Are you there??
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Yeah. What now, I'm busy...................................................
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> Captain, we're going to land on this planet, we're going to go down
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(haahahaha, right). So if you want to go exploring in this brand new world,
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we suggest you MAKE OUR GODAMN CONTROLS STOP SHAKING!!!!!
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Hey....I like just the way they Shake? And Sift...and shut up or I'll send ya
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another Peek. Now go about your business. Swirl, man...swirl.
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> Great. Well, you explore on your own then.
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Thank you, I will
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>> Jim...we're loosing control of the ship.
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> I know. Well, fuckit. Warm the hotub up and I'll go get the tea.
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>> Yessir!
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Now you're thinkin.....I'll come up an join ya!
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> That should be interesting. Come on up, boss man. Oh, and would you like
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to know where we are?
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Ummm....sure.
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> Sensors say,
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! THE LAND OF ELSE !
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! THE LAND OF ELSE !
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! THE LAND OF ELSE!
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! THE LAND OF ELSE !
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! THE LAND OF ELSE !
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! THE LAND OF ELSE!
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! THE LAND OF ELSE !
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! THE LAND OF ELSE !
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Pretty spiffy sensors ya got there.
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> yeah. well we are loosing all control, so until next time boss man, have a
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fine one and what the hell.......SHIP UP THE BLUE!!! Ya only live thrice.
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Thats a lot for us little guys.
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Hahah, ok gotcha... we are now......SHIFTIN!
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<<<<<<AlL cONTROLS aRE USELESS AND aLL ORGANIC THINGS aRE shiftING!!!>>>>
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<<<<danger danger>>>>>
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aHAHAHAHAm SHUT up! Go look that word up in the dictionary.
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Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh
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hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
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..
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....no p .
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a .
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i . ., .
|
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|
n . . . .
|
|||
|
. . m..........................!
|
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|
. . . . . .
|
|||
|
. . .. . .. . . .
|
|||
|
. . . . . . . .
|
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|
. .. .
|
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|
. . . . . .
|
|||
|
. . . . .
|
|||
|
. . ,.,. . .
|
|||
|
. . . ,/ .. . . .. .
|
|||
|
... . . . . .. ..
|
|||
|
. ,. . . . . .
|
|||
|
. . ,./ . . . . .
|
|||
|
. 7 .. . . . .
|
|||
|
. ,. gj 9 .
|
|||
|
./ jhk k 78 645 .
|
|||
|
./ , kg jk7 .
|
|||
|
,./ / /,. hj 0 5 0 4 .
|
|||
|
/ ,. iuk 5 5456 .
|
|||
|
..,./ / .,/ 55 5
|
|||
|
/. . 5 5 5 5 5555
|
|||
|
S 5 555555 S
|
|||
|
S S S
|
|||
|
S SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS S
|
|||
|
S ,; ,,. S
|
|||
|
S . hey bozz man!. S
|
|||
|
S ,, , ; S
|
|||
|
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
|
|||
|
Faded out for about 40 mins....
|
|||
|
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> Hey Captain?
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Yeah?
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> We've seem to taken our helplessness into stride and we're just goin with
|
|||
|
the flow now.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Good.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> We realize that our fate is in your hands....which are our controls....and
|
|||
|
so forth.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Good.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> And WHY are you wearing Vampire teeth?
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Cuz.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> Hmmmm....ok, well, I'm goin back to the hottub, you never did show up...
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Yeah, I am sorta busy down here at the moment. Somebody has to maintane the
|
|||
|
Peeks, Shifts, and whatever Else there is.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> Speaking of Else. We like it here. We think we're gonna stay.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Silly person. Even I can tell you that you can't stay. I could send ya
|
|||
|
somemore Blue though.....but I'm not. Gotta save some for later.....eh?
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> Hmmm. Well, we're gonna camp out here for awhile then.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Sounds like a plan.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> have you looked at yourself lately?
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
No.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> Your wearing gloves, vampire teeth and a jacket, in a hot room while
|
|||
|
drinking a beer thats dribbling down your shirt because the vampire teeth are
|
|||
|
to big for your mouth.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh <grin>
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> Just thought I'd point that out......boss man, Captain, Sir!
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Thats nice....keep up the good work. And gee...while your up there, swab the
|
|||
|
deck or sumpin.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> uh huh.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
\Hey.....there no dark side of the moon, reeally. Matter of fact it's ALL
|
|||
|
dark. Makes a lotta sense huh?
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> Yeah....ok. Our controls are shaking again......
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Bogue...
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> Yeah....Bogue.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
HEY, DO YOU HEAR THAT NOISE??!
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
> What noise??
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
THAT noise....it's goin...
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
<<<<<<<<<<<FFFFFRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYY>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
|
|||
|
.
|
|||
|
. . . . . . . . . . . . .. .
|
|||
|
,,, ,... . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
|
|||
|
, , . . . . ... .. .
|
|||
|
, , . . . . . . .
|
|||
|
, , . . . . .
|
|||
|
, , .. . . . .
|
|||
|
, . . .. .
|
|||
|
. ...... . .
|
|||
|
. .
|
|||
|
. .
|
|||
|
. .
|
|||
|
. .
|
|||
|
.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Colors....I need colors.....
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
<<<<<<SWITCHING TO THE FILE FRY.ANS>>>>>>>>>>>>>>.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
|
|||
|
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
The death of a brain cell.
|
|||
|
There's a madman in your closet.
|
|||
|
aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
|
|||
|
Blend, baby...blend!
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
>> Captain.........
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
what?
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
>> Jim's dead, Captain.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Ah well....another day another cell
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
>> Gee.......thanx.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
L
|
|||
|
e
|
|||
|
t e e
|
|||
|
th r be hphhBLUElphlhplhplhphplhhhhhhhhhh
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
gone
|
|||
|
down under
|
|||
|
zip
|
|||
|
piz
|
|||
|
zoooooom
|
|||
|
<fade>
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<FADE>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
>> end of report....................................bozz man.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Another file downloaded from: NIRVANAnet(tm)
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
& the Temple of the Screaming Electron Jeff Hunter 510-935-5845
|
|||
|
The Salted Slug Strange 408-454-9368
|
|||
|
Burn This Flag Zardoz 408-363-9766
|
|||
|
realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 510-527-1662
|
|||
|
Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 415-583-4102
|
|||
|
Tomorrow's 0rder of Magnitude Finger_Man 415-961-9315
|
|||
|
My Dog Bit Jesus Suzanne D'Fault 510-658-8078
|
|||
|
New Dork Sublime Demented Pimiento 415-566-0126
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Specializing in conversations, obscure information, high explosives,
|
|||
|
arcane knowledge, political extremism, diverse sexuality,
|
|||
|
insane speculation, and wild rumours. ALL-TEXT BBS SYSTEMS.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
Full access for first-time callers. We don't want to know who you are,
|
|||
|
where you live, or what your phone number is. We are not Big Brother.
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
"Raw Data for Raw Nerves"
|
|||
|
|
|||
|
X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X
|
|||
|
|