107 lines
6.8 KiB
Plaintext
107 lines
6.8 KiB
Plaintext
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From: ranjit@gradient.cis.upenn.edu (Ranjit Bhatnagar)
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Newsgroups: talk.bizarre,alt.drugs,alt.consciousness
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Subject: Wisdom teeth and Nitrous Oxide
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Message-ID: <134789@netnews.upenn.edu>
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Nntp-Posting-Host: gradient.cis.upenn.edu
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nitrous oxide/wisdom tooth report
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It started with the foul-tasting anesthetic spray. (Well, it really started
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with the panoramic x-ray, but that's boring. "Bite down on this, hold onto
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these, breathe in, and swallow...") By the time they asked me if I wanted
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nitrous oxide, it was already difficult to speak due to rubbery lips and
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tongue. I was reluctant, but decided to give it a try.
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Lying down on the operating table. They strapped a tube over my nose, and I
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felt panic as I came close to fainting, and breathed through my mouth for a
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while until the world was visible again. Fading vision was replaced by a
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feeling of detachment, tingling and slight numbness in my arms and legs, and a
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loud buzzing-humming-rushing noise which soon either faded away or I learned to
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ignore it. I then spent almost the entire time of surgery planning how I would
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describe what nitrous consciousness is like.
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It felt a lot like lucid dreaming, or like the half-dreaming state on lazy
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weekend mornings. There was a similar sense of distance from my perceptions.
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I could feel, hear, see everything, but it just wasn't my main concern. After
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I had been breathing NO2 for a few minutes, the dentist came in to inject the
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deep anesthetics. He warned me that it would hurt (I could barely hear him
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through the haze) and it did, and I thought yup, that hurts.
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My top stream-of-consciousness -- the talking-to-myself kind of consciousness
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-- was much more lucid than in a dream, pretty close to wakefulness... but not
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quite there. I felt that I could think almost as clearly as ever, though I was
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aware of being easily distracted (like when half asleep), and obviously the
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most important effect was the lack of interest in the physical world. Every
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once in a while I checked the clock (over the foot of the bed), partly to check
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my perception of time (usually about the same as normal consciousness, except
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when I got distracted) and partly just to make sure I could still focus my
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eyes. I couldn't converge the double image, though. I also wiggled my feet
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and fingers whenever they started to feel like they weren't attached any more.
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At some point the surgeon removed my two upper wisdom teeth. I never
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noticed... it must have been easy, so I may have missed it in the much more
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complex process of smashing the two lower teeth to bits with hammers, drills,
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and levers. Whenever I smelled burning enamel or heard the sharp CRACK of
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another chunk being pried off, I thought "I sure am glad I opted for nitrous.
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This wouldn't have hurt much, but it would have scared the heck out of me. As
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it is, I just don't care." The surgeon frequently made requests... open
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wider... turn your head this way... that way... they seemed to drift into my
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consciousness from a distance, and though I was intellectually aware that he
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was right there, it didn't feel that way. I wondered what would happen if I
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refused to obey-- would he think I had fallen asleep?-- but I never refused. I
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wondered what would happen if I bit down on the drill-- but I never did. I
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wondered if people under nitrous would be more susceptible to suggestion--like
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hypnosis--because I had heard that people following hypnotic suggestions had
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similar thoughts: "I could refuse to obey... but I don't feel like it." I had
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all these thoughts and metathoughts--including this one--while under the gas,
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which is why I say I was nearly lucid the whole time. I was always aware that
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I was drugged, and that I felt lucid, and that it was possible that what I
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thought was lucidity at the time really wasn't. But on reflection, breathing
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plain old oxygen and nitrogen now, I don't think I was deceiving myself.
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When I thought of it, I tried little tests of my consciousness. Could I
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recite pi to 16 digits? I could. Could I sing my favorite rounds to myself?
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I could and did, but one round got fixed in my mind and didn't go away until
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I'd been breathing atmosphere for fifteen minutes. I was also aware that I was
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having difficulty thinking of tests, and wondered if that itself was a symptom.
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I wish now that I had thought of testing my visual and aural imagination,
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which is always much more powerful in a half-dream state. I thought, if they
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put this stuff in the air in long plane trips, they would seem to go by a lot
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faster! I wondered if I would seek out illicit nitrous trips in the future,
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and eventually decided that I probably wouldn't, because the chief attraction
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was in avoiding confronting a very unpleasant situation (oral surgery). It
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wouldn't be good for parties, and I couldn't imagine bringing it with me to
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wait in line at the bank or some such.
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I was hoping to write more about that particular feeling- which is what makes
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it such a good surgery drug- but I'm having trouble figuring out how to
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describe it. Although I've said I was almost fully aware of everything that
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happened, that's obviously not really true. After all, I missed two
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extractions entirely. I felt very sleepy the whole time (a rather different
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feeling from the near-fainting when I first started the gas), and several times
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realized that the reason I was having trouble seeing was that my eyes were
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nearly closed. I fought against sleep; I didn't want to be unable to respond
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to the surgeon's instructions. I may have missed a lot during these episodes.
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I know from my clock-watching that I never lost self-awareness for more than 3
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or 4 minutes at a time. I think the most useful thing I can say about nitrous
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consciousness is that my internal mental life became much more important than
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my physical state, like reading an absorbing book while the radio is chattering
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away in the background.
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It took at least 20 minutes after being disconnected from the gas (and I felt
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a definite pang of regret when they took the tube off my nose... is it over
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ALREADY? Total gas time about 25 minutes) before I felt like I was mostly free
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of nitrous consciousness. Some of that may have been the influence of the
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anesthetics, though, which took over three hours to wear off completely. As I
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mentioned before, I tried to keep careful track of time, mostly to prove that I
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could. To my great regret, I forgot to ask in advance if I could keep the
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extracted teeth, and they were medical waste by the time I got around to it.
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Maybe they'll wash up on the Monterey coast sometime soon.
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Later I took a codeine pill and spent the next few hours fainting and
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vomiting, but that's another story. No more codeine for me.
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"Trespassers w" ranjit@gradient.cis.upenn.edu
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The surface of the water where they move swiftly about in curves.
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