61 lines
2.6 KiB
Plaintext
61 lines
2.6 KiB
Plaintext
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Newsgroups: rec.sport.paintball
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Path: zimmer!rat!usc!elroy.jpl.nasa.gov!swrinde!cs.utexas.edu!utnut!torn!nott!cunews!freenet.carleton.ca!Freenet.carleton.ca!ai257
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From: ai257@Freenet.carleton.ca (Dan Leger)
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Subject: Murphy's Laws for Paintball
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Message-ID: <CHoEwF.2LI@freenet.carleton.ca>
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Sender: news@freenet.carleton.ca
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Reply-To: ai257@Freenet.carleton.ca (Durty Dan)
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Organization: The National Capital Freenet
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Date: Tue, 7 Dec 1993 17:50:38 GMT
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Lines: 48
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Murphy once said that "Anything that will go wrong, will go wrong at the
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worst possible moment."
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Well I sez:
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1. Try to look uniportant, they may be low on ammo, or short on time.
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2. NEVER share a bunker with anyone braver than yourself.
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3. Descretion is the better part of valour. Retreat is the better
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part of descretion.
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4. The enemy will only attack on two occaisions, when you're ready
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and when you'r not.
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5. Make it hard for the enemy to get in, and you won't be able to get out.
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6. No matter how much you carry, you'll always run out of something.
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COROLLARY:
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You'll always need what you don't have.
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7. There are only two times when you can get eliminated during a
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game, when you're alone, or with someone else.
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8. Friendly fire, isn't.
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9. Your paintballs will bounce on him, his paintballs will break on you.
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10. The amount of cover you have in front of you is directly
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proportional to the chances of someone coming up behind you.
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11. Incoming fire has the right of way.
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12. Any plan, when explained by the team leader, will have as manny
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different interpretations as there are players who have heard it.
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COROLLARY:
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No plan survives Initial Contact.
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13. No matter how good you are, when your luck runs out--you're road pizza!
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14. There is always someone better, faster and younger than you.
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15. Professionals are predictable, it's the AMATEURS who are dangerous.
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16. When you think that no one would be foolish enough to hide behind
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a particular object, a person will shoot at you from behind it.
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17. All things being equal--you really don't have a snowball's chance
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in hell.
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18. When the enemy is in range--so are you.
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19. The number of players you have with you, in a no win situation, is
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directly proportional to the numbner of stupid ideas you will
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hear to get yourselves out of the situation.
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20. When in doubt, shoot it out.
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21. Never assume ANYTHING.
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As far as I am concerned, Murphy was an optomist.
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--
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"Teamwork, it gets the job done and gives the enemy someone else to shoot at."
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Play hard! Play Fast! Play SAFE!
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Durty Dan--Contributing Editor, ACTION PURSUIT GAMES
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