110 lines
4.9 KiB
Plaintext
110 lines
4.9 KiB
Plaintext
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Mindless Mayhem.......
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Dubbed by request from the author....
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-=-
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Revision Date: 07-02-91
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-=-
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Big Wheels o' Fun!
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By Mr. Beeg
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05/17/91
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In this day and age, I am overwhelmed by TONS of text files that let you
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make blow up this, short-out that, etc.
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As far as I can tell, most of these files are full of shit. The ones that
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are feesable require that you have an engineering degree or an unlimited
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budget and great connections for chemicals. I am tired of reading this crap,
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so I am releasing USABLE information for pissing people off and destroying
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property.
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SIDE NOTE - I am a chemist by trade. When you come across a text file
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involving chemicals, take it with a grain of salt. Many of the formulas
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are inaccurate, and most are simply wrong. Too many of the chemicals are
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not quite as easy to get as you may think. Many of the household substitutes
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simply aren't correct. Use care, and don't be too optimistic!
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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OK! Now on to the fun...
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Sure we all know that little kids are stupid as fuck. We were all once
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stupid as fuck ourselves, right? Well, for some reason, parents of little
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kids can be equally stupid. Here's a way to take advantage of all that
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stupidity and have a BLAST doing it...
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Before kids are old enough to have bikes, they usually have tricyles or
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(even better) Big Wheels. Remember the Big Wheel? It is that all-plastic
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3-wheel low-rider with the big front wheel.
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Getting to the point, kids ALWAYS leave these things out at night. Parents
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are dumb enough to let them. So, all you have to do is walk (or drive)
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through a residential area and look for a Big Wheel. Snag it, then it's
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time for fun.
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You'll need a junky long-sleeve shirt, junky sweatpants or jeans, newspaper,
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heavy fishing line (50 lb. test is nice, but 20# or 30# is fine), a heavy
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glove, and packing tape (preferably clear).
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Stuff the pants and shirt with newspaper. Tape the shirt to the waist of the
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pants. Wad up a ball of newspaper about the size of your head, and wrap it in
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tape. Tape this onto the neck of the shirt. Yes, you now have a dummy.
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For a better effect, place a baseball hat on it. Make sure the stuffing
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doesn't look TOO half-assed. It isn't too hard to make a very human-looking
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figure.
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Now grab the dummy and Big Wheel. Tape the 'feet' to the pedals, and the
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'hands' to the handlebars. Getting the idea yet?
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Now take the fishing line and tie one end to the Big Wheel, preferably under
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the handlebars. Now comes the good part.
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Go back to the residential area (at night is best) and find a car parked
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out in the street. Place the Big Wheel/Dummy combo in front of the car,
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pointing out into the middle of the street. Make sure any traffic can't
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see it. Run the fishing line across the street and hide. Now, PUT THE
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GLOVE ON. If you don't, you will hurt your fingers. Trust me.
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Wait patiently for a car to come from the 'blind side'. When the moving
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car is almost up to the back of the parked car, pull hard! The moving car
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will slam the fuck out of it! The driver may have a heart attack. When
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he/she realizes what really happened, he/she will spazz like crazy!
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This is a fucking blast!
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(Big Wheel) (parked car)
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-------------------------------<2D>----------------------------------------
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| <20><><EFBFBD><EFBFBD><EFBFBD> (moving car)
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| <---- <20><><EFBFBD><EFBFBD><EFBFBD>
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== == == == == == == == |== == == == == == == == == ==
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-------------------------------|----------------------------------------
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(you)
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Of course, this works on busier, faster streets too. Just be careful
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because you don't really want to KILL the driver, right?
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Another variation is to blow off the fishing line, and glue the handlebars
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into the 'straight ahead' position. Go to the top of a hill and push it
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down into oncoming traffic. You could light it on fire, but a car can
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see this a mile away and probably won't hit it.
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Speaking of hills, have I mentioned how much fun rolling old tires or
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stolen bowling balls into traffic is?
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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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OK! That's about it... Have fun and don't get caught!
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Destiny Knights BBS
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7o8<EFBFBD>3o7<EFBFBD>3768
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The NUP is FOURTH DIMENSION
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Make sure (if ya call) to give the names of other boards yer on!
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-----EOF
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