83 lines
4.0 KiB
Plaintext
83 lines
4.0 KiB
Plaintext
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/==:==:==:==:==:==:==:==:==\
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| Urine Box Plans | ... new and improved! ...
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\==:==:==:==:==:==:==:==:==/ 3/2/86----
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Now at last, Underground_Elite brings you these ultrasophisticated box plans
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for, well, uh, I guess we just kind of bring them for you. After many months
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of keeping this puppy secret, we here at Underground_Elite have finally come
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to the consensus that the public oughtn't be kept in the dark from the wrath
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of Ma Bell, that great telephone company in the sky.
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The Urine Box (tm) basically creates a capacitative disturbance between the
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ring and tip wires in another's telephone headset. I have utilized this to the
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distinct advantage of the operator of the Urine box and to the disadvantage
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of the other party involved, hopefully you won't get caught.
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Without further ado, wire this schematic together. Copper wire (or gold)
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will work best due to its lessened resistance. It might be a good idea to
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keep the wiring cooled, to further reduce current loss.
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47k ohms --------------- .01 uF
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!\ !------/\/\/-----------! SPST switch !----!------)!---------!
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! \ ! --------------- ! !
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! !--! ! ! +
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! !----------<-!-----!--------/\/\/------------! ----------
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! / PVP diode ! 470k ohms ! 12 VDC !
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!/ ! _ ----------
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! / .005 uF ! -
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SPKR 20W !-------/\/\/\/\/---------)!----<-!---------!
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! _/ VR1 (see note1) PVP diode !
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! !
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to RING to TIP
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(your phone) (your phone)
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note1 - VR1 is a three position variable resistor, enabling settings
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equivalent to 100k ohms, 210k ohms, and 320k ohms (all 110k apart).
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note2 - The diodes are silicon-germanium based bipolar RF reducers to limit
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current polarity reversal. If these are placed backwards the box will not
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work as intended.
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note3 - The speaker will emit low tones when the SPST is closed (ie the box
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is "ON") and when the settings of VR1 are moved to higher resistance the tone
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level will increase.
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note4 - Place setting evaluation symbols to represet the lowest resistance
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setting for VR1 to be "STEAM", the second (210) to be "MELT", the third (320)
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to be "VAPORIZE".
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Usage of box.
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Use in place of your normal telephone receiver. Do not attempt usage as a
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regular phone. Call victim by sending tones through speaker with tape recorded
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noise. Use touch tone sounds as pulse requires electric disruption of line,
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not just audio. After answer (listen in on SPKR 1) set VR1 to desired strength
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and let her go. Victim will feel unpleasant sensations in his/her head and
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will undergo a series of high intensity seizures, not unlike epilepsy, and
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jointly proportional to VR-1 setting and time induced.
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Settings. (The Fun Part)
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STEAM. A short -poof- of water vapor condenses within the victim's earpiece,
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rendering the telephone short circuited and the victim quite dazed.
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MELT. Causes structural phase change of receiver (usually reinforced
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ureaformaldehyde plastic material - high tech). This has the unpleasant
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bonus of removing the victim's hand.
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VAPORIZE. If the victim is particularly nasty, this setting will remove his
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upper anatomy (if box is enabled properly, that is!). Continued usage
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of this setting is generally not recommended, as death or other serious
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injury will accompany.
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Disclaimer.
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Yes, I will refuse to take responsibility for your incompetence in electrical
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doings. This includes my reluctance to give court testimony, etc. etc.
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Wolfgang von Albatross
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Attorney at Law, ex Telco employee.
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